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#1
Jan 22, 2015, 11:57 PM
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Sadly, I'm an addict. Addicted to anything possible. I fell under the midst of various drugs. So young and so experienced in the art of drugs. It was something I was good at. I'm not good at anything other than drugs. Why can't I be normal? Why can't I be human? Why must I fall so deeply in love with the art of drugs? Intoxication is what I crave. I feed off a possible high or buzz. Why am I so addicted? Why am I so in love? I feel I desire intoxication far too much. I've been in love with it for many years. It keeps me sane. It helps me fear. I'm battling myself and it's a terrible battle, indeed.
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 angelicgoldfish05, gayleggg, sideblinded
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#2
Jan 23, 2015, 07:14 AM
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I'm sorry addiction is giving you such a tough time. Have you been in counseling. I had to do extensive therapy to get help for the addictions I had. Though, it doesn't work for everyone. I was also in a 12step group for years. It was like I was trying to fill up an empty hole in my soul.
Keep working at it. There is hope.
__________________
Bipolar I, Depression, GAD Meds: Zoloft, Zyprexa, Ritalin "Each morning we are born again. What we do today is what matters most." -Buddha  |
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#3
Jan 23, 2015, 08:54 AM
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Apparently addicts are looking for connection! Most medical patients in hospital for surgery etc who are given hard drugs return to their loving families and quit morphine etc easily, rats injected with hard drugs return to enriched happy cages and stop needing the "hit"! Apparently people who use drugs lack human connection and fab environments! Countries who stopped punishing addicts and banning drugs in "wars on drugs" but spent the law enforcement money instead on helping drug users, had better outcomes! Sounds all very hippie and sunshiney! If only you could have all yr relationship and genetic and environmental problems solved overnight!  Addiction gone! Magic apparently! 
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| angelicgoldfish05, theGorcelainDoll13
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 angelicgoldfish05, theGorcelainDoll13
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#4
Jan 23, 2015, 02:51 PM
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#5
Jan 23, 2015, 05:53 PM
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It's interesting isn't it theGorcelaindoll13!!
I stopped abusing anything for about 15 years and now, when it appears that the husband I adored can't be trusted, I'm back drinking too much and too often! The idea of the book does seem to make sense! |
| theGorcelainDoll13
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| theGorcelainDoll13
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#6
Jan 23, 2015, 06:17 PM
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If you are willing to accept that mood-altering chemicals are crutches, then it would be logical that these emotional "crutches" prop us up but make us weaker and more dependent upon them in the long run...
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| theGorcelainDoll13
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#7
Jan 23, 2015, 06:25 PM
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The Likely Cause of Addiction Has Been Discovered, and It Is Not What You Think | Johann Hari
Agreed mountain human - drug addiction is not the best way to live your life! But - the fact that many animals use drugs to feel better and usually only abuse them to the point of illness in times of stress and suffering, challenges current models like AA (which doesn't work for everyone) where the belief is that "your brain is a failure" - to a more optimistic model where, if u work on yr relationships and fix yr life etc, u won't necessarily have to struggle with addiction for ever! Addiction is your response to mental pain rather than the cause of a "wasted life"! |
| theGorcelainDoll13
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| theGorcelainDoll13
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#8
Jan 24, 2015, 01:36 PM
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#9
Jan 31, 2015, 07:00 PM
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I'm sorry Gorcelain Doll
I didn't see the post above until today! Makes perfect sense to me that you would start drinking because u were hurt by an unfaithful husband. Is he still about?
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#10
Feb 01, 2015, 01:26 PM
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Quote:
__________________
To love for the sake of being loved is human. To love for the sake of loving is angelic. |
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#11
Feb 02, 2015, 05:58 PM
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Just a quick follow-up...I used alcohol, etc. as a coping mechanism. But it only fixed things temporarily, usually things got progressively worse. That's the main thing I got from AA and therapy--finding healthy coping mechanisms for when the s**t hits the fan. And that's what happens in life: people betray us, they die on us, health problems, financial problems, etc, etc...no one is free from life's chaos. The question is how do we deal with it?
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| FallingTears
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#12
Feb 11, 2015, 10:23 PM
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12 step may not be the only way, but it is a way and does provide some sense of belonging and connection to something larger than oneself.
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| Reply |
This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
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