[ComfortablyNumb5]

Yesterday was bad. I made it almost exactly one year with no alcohol. Well my bf and I got into our hugest blowout ever. We both said some very awful ****. I told him to leave. And I thought he was leaving. So I thought two years was down the drain so "****it" right? Oddly, the first liquor store I stopped at, I ran into my dad lol. Can I get a bigger sign than that? Lied and said I was getting a soda. Then I went to another store. Got my usual old drink. My cold huge cans of beer. Got home and bf was still here. We faught more and he started packing. I sat and drank while he packed. Then before walking out the door he turns around and says he never wants to leave. He wants to spend the rest of his life with with me. So at this point we had already sent the step kids to grandmas because we were fighting so bad. So no kids, then plus beer, and a great dinner to cook, we made a night of it. It actually turned out good! I'll leave out details lol.

And then I woke up lol. There's two more beers in the fridge and if this was a year ago, I would of gotten right out of bed and grabbed one. But they are staying in there if not getting dumped. My head is pounding and I feel like crap.

I'm not saying I will NEVER drink again. But I can say I didn't miss it and it wasn't all it used to be. It was a messed up day. We both recovered. Now back on that wagon I go.

Just wanted to share.

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[Skeezyks]

Congratulations on making it through, RxQueen875!

Thank you for sharing that. So being on the wagon has ruined drinking for you for life. And you found out you can't drink anymore which was another good lessoned learned. Don't look at it as 2 years wasted, look at it as a lesson learned. Sobriety is not about being dry (not swallowing alcohol). Sobriety is about more than that, it is about learning the lessons so we don't drink, do not want to drink, and realize we can't drink. I am proud of you for what you shared. And it is a miracle to fall off the wagon and want to go back on it again. I congratulate you on that! Blessings and tc

[ComfortablyNumb5]

Originally Posted by omegalamed

Thank you for sharing that. So being on the wagon has ruined drinking for you for life. And you found out you can't drink anymore which was another good lessoned learned. Don't look at it as 2 years wasted, look at it as a lesson learned. Sobriety is not about being dry (not swallowing alcohol). Sobriety is about more than that, it is about learning the lessons so we don't drink, do not want to drink, and realize we can't drink. I am proud of you for what you shared. And it is a miracle to fall off the wagon and want to go back on it again. I congratulate you on that! Blessings and tc

Thank you! That means so much to me and to have support. Yes I messed up but good thing is I caught myself before it got out of hand. I could of easily fallen back into it like I've done many times before (especially with everything I'm going through right now). Those two beers are still in the fridge and my bf can have them or I have no problem dumping them. I am proud of myself and thank you again!

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[Refuse2Sink]

You have to always be proud of yourself for every good decision you make in trying to recover, even if it follows a not so good one.

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