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Metaphysic
Member Since Aug 2016
Location: The Netherlands
Posts: 13,024
(SuperPoster!)
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#21
****s SAKE phenibut it like alcohol makes me social and I'm not social at all off of it. When I take it, I get peridlcarisis or what ever the **** and high blood pressure and these ****ing xanaxs and zopiclone are ****ed I want off everything I'm sick of waiting and life itself suck of people
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Elder
Member Since Nov 2016
Location: Texas
Posts: 5,037
7 15 hugs
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#22
My sponsor said something tonight that upset me more than I already was... I was trying to tell him I have been feeling sui. He said sometimes he feels like I want attention. WTF... I don't understand how someone can say that when the other person I already struggling. The only reason I survived Wednesday was because I dissociated... (I told the IOP T Thursday and we discussed things after group.) I haven't told my sponsor that part because he is also a social worker and I would really rather not deal with a welfare check. IOP T was ok letting me leave, I don't know what sponsor's level of comfort is... But really, I want attention because I get sui a lot? How about I'm sui all the time, at least passively, and I just don't mention it most of the time...
Sorry the whole "doing it for attention" mindset really pisses me off... I just needed to rant for a minute. __________________ ![]() Diagnoses: PTSD with Dissociative Symptoms, Borderline Personality Disorder, Generalized Anxiety Disorder, Fibromyalgia and Chronic Pain |
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Moderator
Community Support Team Member Since Mar 2006
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 11,427
18 78 hugs
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#23
childofchaos, you're sponsor sounds spectacularly uninformed, especially if they are a social worker. Personally, if it were me, I just wouldn't mention it to them again, and just would consider dealing with the the SU ideation with help of your IOP and T.
I'd also consider looking for a new sponsor who has actual experience in dealing with mental illness. That's why I really like double recovery meetings. They get it, and it's ok to talk about both mental health and addiction in the meetings. Hang in. splitimage |
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Elder
Member Since Nov 2016
Location: Texas
Posts: 5,037
7 15 hugs
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#24
Quote:
__________________ ![]() Diagnoses: PTSD with Dissociative Symptoms, Borderline Personality Disorder, Generalized Anxiety Disorder, Fibromyalgia and Chronic Pain |
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![]() Bill3
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Elder
Member Since Jan 2010
Location: Where? US
Posts: 5,621
14 101 hugs
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#25
115 days!!! In 5 days I'll have 4 months!! I give this win to my higher power. May you find something that helps you.
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![]() Bill3, emgreen
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Legendary
Member Since Mar 2009
Location: USA
Posts: 10,936
15 24.1k hugs
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#26
Congratulations!
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Moderator
Community Support Team Member Since Mar 2006
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 11,427
18 78 hugs
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#27
My addictions Dr. has agreed to prescribe gabapentin to me for cravings, which are through the roof at the moment. I hope it helps, Naltrexone did nothing for me.
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Magnate
Member Since Feb 2013
Location: planet earth
Posts: 2,986
11 401 hugs
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#28
Quote:
I take gabapentin for nerve pain. It makes you tired throughout the day so that’s why I take it at night for bed. __________________ Love, Light and Happiness!!! |
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Student of Life
Member Since Mar 2014
Location: South America
Posts: 4,673
10 2,913 hugs
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#29
Wow, I realized I haven't had alcohol in a very long time now. I can't remember when I last had a drink. This is the longest I've made it in a while.
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Elder
Member Since Jan 2010
Location: Where? US
Posts: 5,621
14 101 hugs
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#30
Day 119. And I don't know what I need right now. This isn't a good headspace to be in.
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Moderator
Community Support Team Member Since Mar 2006
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 11,427
18 78 hugs
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#31
greentires4me, yes my pharmacist warned it might make me tired, but my Dr. wants me to try taking it in 2 doses, 1 an hour before my cravings usually hit, and one at night. I'm hoping it doesn't knock me out too much.
WastingAsparagus - that's great. Are you feeling better without the drinking? Keep it up. puzzlecar. Today should be 4 months right. Congratulations. I hope you do something to celebrate. I think everyone is feeling sort of on edge and out of sorts, I know I am, due to COVID. Don't know if you're on lock down or not - we are, and I find being cooped up in my apartment is really bad for my mental health. I'm coping with phone calls with friends. I'm doing ok. I'm a little over 17 months, so in about 3 weeks, I'll hit 18 months which is my previous best ever, so I'm happy about that. Taking it a day at a time, but I'm determined to get to 2 years. |
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![]() Desoxyn
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Elder
Member Since Jan 2010
Location: Where? US
Posts: 5,621
14 101 hugs
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#32
Quote:
That is so exciting that your three weeks till 18 months! I know that we are all stressed but I also know that this, if we let it, will make us stronger! Being isolated is tough. I find myself wanting to go out and also not wanting too. It's difficult to navigate. But oh well, most things in life are difficult! |
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Moderator
Community Support Team Member Since Mar 2006
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 11,427
18 78 hugs
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#33
My addictions Dr. called me on Fri. to talk and see how I and my recovery are doing. She's trying to schedule phone appointments with all her regular patients once a week, which is great support.
Also she prescribed me gabapentin to help with alcohol cravings. It's been like a miracle drug for me. After taking it for 2 days - zero cravings. Unfortunately I don't like some of the side effects so I'll have to see if they wear off after a couple of weeks. |
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Elder
Member Since Nov 2016
Location: Texas
Posts: 5,037
7 15 hugs
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#34
Got 2 months yesterday. Because of all this, can't go get a keytag or a chip.
__________________ ![]() Diagnoses: PTSD with Dissociative Symptoms, Borderline Personality Disorder, Generalized Anxiety Disorder, Fibromyalgia and Chronic Pain |
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![]() Bill3, emgreen
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Legendary
Member Since Mar 2009
Location: USA
Posts: 10,936
15 24.1k hugs
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#35
Well done childofchaos831!
![]() I'm sorry about the keytag or chip. ![]() ![]() Still: You are doing great! ![]() ![]() |
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Wise Elder
Member Since Aug 2012
Location: Michigan
Posts: 9,645
(SuperPoster!)
12 937 hugs
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#36
I worry about folks having to go without AA or other support groups during these times. "Idle hands are the devil's workshop." Since I have a few 24 hours the urges haven't hit me, but I know how difficult things were early in sobriety. You are to be commended for your two months, childofchaos! I'm not sure what would have happened to me in a situation like this at two months. Stay safe, sober and clean, y'all!
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![]() Bill3, childofchaos831
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Wise Elder
Member Since Oct 2017
Location: USA
Posts: 9,890
(SuperPoster!)
6 9,941 hugs
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#37
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Elder
Member Since Jan 2010
Location: Where? US
Posts: 5,621
14 101 hugs
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#38
4 months and 4 days!!!!
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![]() emgreen
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Moderator
Community Support Team Member Since Mar 2006
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 11,427
18 78 hugs
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#39
Congratulations childofchaos, well done.
And puzzlecar, congratulations on your 4 months 4 days. Keep up the good work everyone. splitimage |
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![]() childofchaos831
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Metaphysic
Member Since Aug 2016
Location: The Netherlands
Posts: 13,024
(SuperPoster!)
8 4,929 hugs
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#40
Slightly addicted to phenibut and xanax. Dependent on zopiclone.
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