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Member
Member Since Nov 2008
Posts: 206
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Dec 06, 2008 at 10:07 PM
#1
so for a while now i have been smoking pot, just a way of coping with my depression i guess.
 it just makes me so happy and i forget about everything. but now i cant get through my day without smoking and i get angry when i cant. i'm just sick of this temporary high to satisfy me. anyone have any thoughts or ideas of how to stop...? i tried but it was too hard. i like smoking and dont care enough to stop but know i should 
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Elder
Member Since Nov 2008
Location: Sunny East Coast Florida!
Posts: 6,873
15 542 hugs
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Dec 07, 2008 at 11:40 PM
#2
that's a good question of ideas of how to stop using. for me it had to be me wanting to stop bad enough. i was told, "we quit when we are sick and tired of feeling sick and tired"...of it and where it takes us. problem was that for me i had to go down a very slippery slope before i hung it up. i realize today i could have done what i needed to do long before the mass destruction of "self" happened to me but i didn't want to bad enough. so...i went further down first. (by no means do i advocate what i did to others. i almost didn't make it back to the "world'.) by the time i got clean and sober i was so terrified that i might ever use again and it took me almost 5 years one day at a time and a 12 step recovery program on a daily basis to finally gain some element of confidence that i could truly do this..meaning successfully staying stopped.
anything mood altering did provide minor temporary relief from my bipolar but in the end it bit me in my behind. IMHO. __________________ Do not let your fire go out, spark by irreplaceable spark, in the hopeless swamps of the approximate, the not-quite, the not-yet, the not-at-all. Do not let the hero in your soul perish, in lonely frustration for the life you deserved, but have never been able to reach. Check your road and the nature of your battle. The world you desired can be won. It exists, it is real, it is possible, it is yours..~Ayn Rand |
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 Capp, lmg103
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Feb 2008
Location: SC
Posts: 4,083
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Dec 08, 2008 at 11:46 AM
#3
Quote:
But wishing is for children..and I have pretty much given it up...sometimes I slip...  But change always begins with the desire to...and often that desire creeps up on you... Keep wrestling with it..keep seeking answers and maybe eventually you'll get real sick and tired of being sick and tired... Chances are it will easier with some help..have you tried a NA meeting..lots of folks there with the very same battle going on.. With care, Lenny __________________ I have only one conclusion,,and that is things change too quickly for me to draw them.... Sobriety date...Halloween 1989. I was plucked from hell...and treat this gift as if it is the only one... |
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lmg103
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Poohbah
Member Since Oct 2008
Location: Third Star On The Left
Posts: 1,096
15
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Dec 08, 2008 at 04:04 PM
#4
Quote:
What popped out at me was "coping with my depression." have you sought any treatment for your depression? yeah, smoking will make you float-in-feel-good then you crash and it becomes a cycle...at least that was my experience when I was drinking/doping "temporary high" speaks to me. it's what I wanted so badly when I felt so damn bad and carried a lot of anger and self-hatred. I knew I couldn't stay high all the time, so I thought I deserved a temporary one... lmg103, I sincerely wish you well in stopping. jmo, but there does seem to be a wee bit of fear/frustration in your post... Cap __________________ The most dangerous enemy is the one in your head telling you what you do and don't deserve. ~~unknown~~ http://capp.psychcentral.net |
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Member
Member Since Nov 2008
Posts: 206
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Dec 09, 2008 at 06:12 PM
#5
capp, well i hadn't been getting any thing for my depression, but recently i had a fall out and blah now i gotta go to lots of therapy. but ya, the high just makes me feel so good for at least a little, and i feel like i deserve that. but when its gone its just neverrr ending. i want to feel good again, so i smoke more. its just so hard. i feel like right now, i cant stop.
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Poohbah
Member Since Oct 2008
Location: Third Star On The Left
Posts: 1,096
15
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Dec 10, 2008 at 02:33 AM
#6
Quote:
hey, just my opinion...you are doing the best you can right now. please don't put yourself down, ok? You are aware of changes you want to make and you will make them when you are ready...it may be soon, it may be later. Keep sharing as honestly as you already have... I admire that in you, img. Honesty and I believe there is willingness developing, too I know it's hard. I'm going to share something with you now...when I had my surgery and was getting my pre-op meds, I throughly enjoyed that temporary high. I'm not ashamed of feeling that way, either. It was a bit of a reminder of how good it can feel even for a little while...but I'm still fiercely protective of being clean and sober. I came out of the gutter and I'll do everything I can not to take up residence there again... Cap __________________ The most dangerous enemy is the one in your head telling you what you do and don't deserve. ~~unknown~~ http://capp.psychcentral.net |
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lmg103
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