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Poohbah
Member Since Jun 2013
Location: So. Cali
Posts: 1,495
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#1
My parents are coming to visit on the 19th. I had been anxious but have found my thoughts shifting to a peaceful place. In part because of the work I'm doing to strengthen my positive energy. So I'm feeling better about myself. And I'm letting go of the outcome. They're coming to help me buy a car. I keep saying if / when I get a reliable car... Who knows what will happen. I can only control my sense of self regardless of if I get a car. And then I also started feeling pity for them. I like who I am and i feel sorry for their unconscious way of living. My mother's health pays the price. Instead of feeling annoyed with her aches and pains I see them as a manifestation of her internalized denials. My father just takes most everything personally and lashes out. I know what it's like to take things personally and the insecurity behind it.
All this is giving me the gift of separating myself from them. I feel strong... My relationship with my boyfriend has helped me break the anxiety that kept me silent and feeling like a victim. I've been speaking up to them (and him) in the sense of setting lines and boundaries that I insist be respected... without getting overwhelmed in trying to achieve some deep connection or understanding (which rarely if ever gave results)... Does that make sense? |
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JadeAmethyst, kaliope
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Legendary Wise Elder
Community Liaison
Member Since Jun 2011
Location: somewhere, out there
Posts: 36,240
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#2
it sounds like you are doing a good job taking care of yourself.
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htebsiL radnalaS
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htebsiL radnalaS
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Magnate
Member Since Jul 2012
Location: gone
Posts: 2,224
12 1,739 hugs
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#3
Yes, it makes sense. I think you will surprised at how well you will be, and how you may even enjoy the visit with them. Either way, wishing you well.
warm regards Jade __________________ |
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htebsiL radnalaS
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htebsiL radnalaS
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