[lb84]

Okay, so a few months ago, I opened up to my mom about some of the things I've been struggling with, one of them being weight and restrictive eating.

We figured some things out however I'm not sure what to do. I'm only 16 so I'm still stuck at home with this stuff.

I feel like my life is being dominated by this problem and while I don't want to let it go, I'm so scared to move forward into my life and possibly be in a relationship or have kids without getting help. My mom has specifically said to me that we will "handle this together" which means no outside help.

I don't have time to deal with a therapist or inpatient/outpatient treatment or anything right now, and I'm not mentally ready. However, I do want to get diagnosed because I'm very tired of having questions in my life about what exactly I'm struggling with and I also feel that people discredit me since I'm not diagnosed (even though I know that shouldn't matter).

I'm not sure what my question is but I'm just extremely confused about what I want in my life right now. Can someone please help me sort this out?

Thank for reading

[buttrfli42481]

Can you talk to your school counselor or another trusted adult? I can sort of understand your mom's view of dealing with it with no outside help, but sometimes you need to be proactive and ask for the help. Of course, with you being a minor getting help has to include your mom being willing. She may not want outside help because she is scared to admit that you have an ED. I am 31 and have been dealing with anorexia for about 16 yrs off and on. I never asked for help when I was your age because I wanted to be seen as perfect. I have now been in treatment twice and am doing great this time around. I had to miss my daughter's dance recital due to being inpatient, but I had to take care of me in order to take care of her. Sometimes we have to put our lives on hold so we can get the help we need to live our lives. It is not an easy journey, but one that is managable with the right help. I hope you are able to get that help with your mom's approval.

[lb84]

Originally Posted by buttrfli42481

Can you talk to your school counselor or another trusted adult? I can sort of understand your mom's view of dealing with it with no outside help, but sometimes you need to be proactive and ask for the help. Of course, with you being a minor getting help has to include your mom being willing. She may not want outside help because she is scared to admit that you have an ED. I am 31 and have been dealing with anorexia for about 16 yrs off and on. I never asked for help when I was your age because I wanted to be seen as perfect. I have now been in treatment twice and am doing great this time around. I had to miss my daughter's dance recital due to being inpatient, but I had to take care of me in order to take care of her. Sometimes we have to put our lives on hold so we can get the help we need to live our lives. It is not an easy journey, but one that is managable with the right help. I hope you are able to get that help with your mom's approval.

Thank you, I hope you're doing alright. I'm sorry to hear you've been struggling for so long though, I wish you the absolute best luck.

I've just actually talked to her this evening and we've agreed to set up an appointment with my doctor to set up a plan. I feel very relieved and I am so glad some things are going to get resolved.

[AngelWolf3]

Yay! I am glad to hear that your mom is going to help you and that you will find some relief. The forum here is a great place to vent/let your feelings out, as you have discovered already!
I am so glad your mom is on board with you. Having a good, patient, support person is great! I would encourage her to find some ED/anorexia books to better understand what is going on (that is what my mom did when she finally decided to believe me that I had a problem). I don't remember the name of the ones she had, but I can ask her if you have trouble finding good medical ones. (I avoid certain ones, because some only trigger/unwittingly suggest ways to further the ED)

[lb84]

Originally Posted by Wolfin3

Yay! I am glad to hear that your mom is going to help you and that you will find some relief. The forum here is a great place to vent/let your feelings out, as you have discovered already!
I am so glad your mom is on board with you. Having a good, patient, support person is great! I would encourage her to find some ED/anorexia books to better understand what is going on (that is what my mom did when she finally decided to believe me that I had a problem). I don't remember the name of the ones she had, but I can ask her if you have trouble finding good medical ones. (I avoid certain ones, because some only trigger/unwittingly suggest ways to further the ED)

Yeah, it's just frustrating because I'm not mentally ready to recover but I do want to get diagnosed. I don't see how I can open up about this problem I'm having to a doctor without having to worry about getting forced into treatment that I'm not ready for.