[argv]

well. I just recently got diagnosed as bipolar, but am wondering about it. I originally got diagnosed as ADHD when I was 21 (14 years ago).

I dunno. I'm just plain anti social. I don't care for people. I like watching them, but not really associating with them. I've done some messed up things in the past (hurting animals, people, etc) but have much grown out of all that. I'm pretty infamous around my little town. I know alot of people, or at least know OF alot of people, I only have a few friends, and nobody that truly knows my whole past.

I dunno. I'm exploring different avenues as I see I definitely have some psychopathic qualities to me. If I quit taking medication, I know I like the crazy feeling.. but would end up quitting my job and who knows what else. But trying to diagnose myself on medication is difficult. I feel different.

From what I've read, I have some definite lack of empathy. I can fake it kinda, but I don't really have any. I'm pretty empty and void inside. I even wrote a song about it called "I am void". haha But I don't know if that's just bipolar or what. I don't really want to mention it to the psychologist for fear that.. i'm right. haha

[IKellyI]

As people start to age to 40, their ASPD traits tend to become less severe. Something else you might be interested in looking at is Asperger´s. They share some qualities with ASPD, however, aren´t as "cynical" from what I´ve seen anyways. DO you manipulate people to get what you want? Without regard for their feelings after you have accomplished your mission? Are you a pathological liar? Also, I have made a song about a hypothetical serial killer, that I just so happen to know... Hehe.

[argv]

I don't give a **** about anyone. Asbergers is more about hearing weird noises like tapping and can't stand it isn't it?

I can lie, if it suits me or if I have to. I've lied or twisted the truth several times for various reasons.

perhaps I'm a little more calculated. I've waited years to get back at someone. But then again, I've also done some things totally unplanned.. But usually when I'm drinking.

Uhmm.. My uncles exibit this disorder very much. They're effing ruthless. I am too if provoked enough.

I know noone here can make a diagnosis, but I like to talk with people that have been diagnosed just to see if I fit the bill at all by asking basic questions.

This isn't something I think is cool, it actually kinda scares me. The mere fact that I could see myself doing very bad things without guilt or remorse tells me
I might be worse off than my doc is telling me. But I dunno.

[argv]

one of my questions is... How do you feel about your friends? I personally feel like I have to protect them sometimes from other predators. I like my friends, but can also walk away from a lifelong friendship without a hint of emotion. I can make friends easily. People think I'm a really nice, safe, person.. Although some people seem to see through me a little. Those people I try to make friends with. I do something kind and it's usually all good.

Anyways, I'm the guy in the crowd that never smiles. People think it's creepy sometimes but I can change to make it less creepy and more lighthearted. I smile when i'm in 'social mode', laughing, talking, etc.. But thats about it. I have no real feelings toward anyone. Not even family.

"I don't give a **** about anyone. Asbergers is more about hearing weird noises like tapping and can't stand it isn't it?
I can lie, if it suits me or if I have to. I've lied or twisted the truth several times for various reasons."
"I'm the guy in the crowd that never smiles."

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Asperge...haracteristics
It notes a distinct lack of empathy & emotional reciprocity, as well as a lack of facial expression... I have absolutely no problem with facial expressions! I smile to myself if I think about something funny, look pissed if I think of something that pisses me off. Personally, I'm not really fond of being around people myself, but being ASPD isn't equivalent to being "creepy" as far as I'm aware! Perhaps you have some unassociated social anxiety?
However, depending on how severe on the Autism Spectrum someone is, they usually have a hard time lying. But that DEFINITELY varies from person to person -- usually lying is harder when put under pressure or when the lie involves concrete fact. And since you've been diagnosed ADHD before, that could be prevalent for EITHER Asperger's or ASPD, seeing as in childhood/adolescence they can present similarly... Or it could have been your Bipolar. ADHD presents itself in a lot of different ways.

"This isn't something I think is cool, it actually kinda scares me. The mere fact that I could see myself doing very bad things without guilt or remorse tells me I might be worse off than my doc is telling me. But I dunno."

Do you feel like you have no control over yourself? If not, then what warrants you to be scared? It's not like everyone with a diagnosis slapped on them goes out & kills people. If anything, since I've been self-realized, I've been a lot less careless... Self-knowledge is a tool that makes the difference between acting on every whim & finding new ways to entertain yourself.
Granted, I'm probably not THE star example since I've actually been acting out a lot lately (oh, the benefits of being young!)... But instead of going around the condominium & picking/stealing everyone's gate locks just to **** with them, I'm struggling to entertain myself otherwise. Do I like holding back? Not particularly, no. But talking obsessively here & wasting my time in other ways is a lot cooler than getting arrested (since they have multi-directional cameras not unlike in department stores on every floor...).
But no, it's not cool. However it can be useful sometimes.

"How do you feel about your friends? I personally feel like I have to protect them sometimes from other predators. I like my friends, but can also walk away from a lifelong friendship without a hint of emotion. I can make friends easily. People think I'm a really nice, safe, person.. Although some people seem to see through me a little. Those people I try to make friends with. I do something kind and it's usually all good."

I don't feel like I ever need to protect them, per se, however that kind of circumstance at least allows me to get some frustration out of my system. Said 'predator' is an easily accessible target & would allow me to have a little fun. I keep many acquaintances around so I never run out of possible sources of entertainment/help should I ever need it & I have very few friends. The few friends I do have are somewhat aware, but it really depends. Some are directly aware (my boyfriend, my partner in crime, & maybe one or two others), meanwhile everyone else recognizes the features but doesn't have the full picture. To some people it's devestating (family), but others seem to find me entertaining!
Unless someone gives me problems, there's no real need to start conflict. Unless I'm bored, but I'd rather find someone worthwhile to target because I kill two birds with one stone: Keeping my friends & dissolving my boredom. That way I don't totally blow my cover, which is important... To most people, all we do all day is think of ways to hurt people. As if we don't have lives of our own? Hahahaha

****. I need to think of something else to do other than talk my *** off on these forums. :|

[argv]

Hmm.. Sounds like me. I'm older though.. So I have calmed down quite a bit. I still make friends for a specific purpose, but then I'm a real asshole on facebook. I know I can make friends with pretty much anyone, but only choose those that can possibly help me out, and I always like making an enemy for whatever reason. When I say protect my friends, it's exactly like you say.. I get my enjoyment of having a reason to mess with someone, and show my 'love' for a friend at the same time.win,win. I don't mind helping people if it helps me or if I see something in the future that might be helpful. Lately I used a bunch of people to cry on their digital shoulders, then insinuated they were a bunch of asshole
Humans and deleted them. (facebook again) thats where I get to **** with normals. FB. Haha

I dunno, I just know I'm a real non-caring son of a *****, and everyone knows it. I got no feelings for anyone, and I absolutley hate trying to say 'I love you'. But I hate to say 'I don't love you' especially to family members. I like to seem like a nice guy. Really I'm a bit of a skeezy bastard. Haha

Then again, maybe I'm just really narcissistic.