[Mattmx]

Brutal honesty seems to be a trait to ditch on this site. No matter how nice you word things, people still get defensive and offended. Does anyone have any suggestions on how to "fix" this issue? I really don't think I'm in the wrong..but I feel like now I have to either not talk or get insulted for having an opinion.

[unaluna]

I read your new member intro. I think you just think you know how other people feel. You dont really take the time to find out. You have a lot of potential but youre not using it right now; not in a mature way.

[Mattmx]

Originally Posted by hankster

I read your new member intro. I think you just think you know how other people feel. You dont really take the time to find out. You have a lot of potential but youre not using it right now; not in a mature way.

Even if I'm not saying something directed at others, I get caught up in this drama though. What made you think I don't understand how people are feeling? There is a lot more to me than my introduction; it was a rather vague rundown and every time I read back on it I get cringes on how bad it is.

[unaluna]

Originally Posted by Mattmx

Even if I'm not saying something directed at others, I get caught up in this drama though. What made you think I don't understand how people are feeling? There is a lot more to me than my introduction; it was a rather vague rundown and every time I read back on it I get cringes on how bad it is.

Just cuz i could relate to it so much! I mean, i always thought i knew what other people meant, now im in a phase where i realize i really do not, and it is hard to get it. If you just go by the first sentence or two, yes, you think you get it; any more than that, and im like wtf where are they coming from??

As for the brutal honesty in general, i dont know if you meant on the avpd (which i always read as avoir du poids) but thats why they say this is a support website - we do try to say things as positively as possible. Its good practice. Probably a lot of us are here because we were raised by people being negative at us all the time. I know i was. And i didnt even realize i was acting that out and that people didnt like me because of it. And here i am such a sweet person! Effin a, ya know?

Eta - i thought your intro was fine. It really displayed your intelligence, which i liked, and where your head is at, which i also liked that it did.

[Mattmx]

Originally Posted by hankster

Just cuz i could relate to it so much! I mean, i always thought i knew what other people meant, now im in a phase where i realize i really do not, and it is hard to get it. If you just go by the first sentence or two, yes, you think you get it; any more than that, and im like wtf where are they coming from??

As for the brutal honesty in general, i dont know if you meant on the avpd (which i always read as avoir du poids) but thats why they say this is a support website - we do try to say things as positively as possible. Its good practice. Probably a lot of us are here because we were raised by people being negative at us all the time. I know i was. And i didnt even realize i was acting that out and that people didnt like me because of it. And here i am such a sweet person! Effin a, ya know?

Eta - i thought your intro was fine. It really displayed your intelligence, which i liked, and where your head is at, which i also liked that it did.

Thanks, I just don't think it was a good representation of my life like I intended it to be. I agree partially though. For me, it's easy to see how they feel, but to understand why they feel that way is where I get lost. I try to keep things positive, and never direct statements at the person to avoid them being defensive, but sometimes I think people are just too self destructive to accept statements that are honest and different from theirs.