[Cwill]

Hi all, this is my first time on this site, i hope i can get a little help with some issues. I have not been to a doctor yet or had any formal diagnostics, but ive been experiencing symptoms of what i believe is anxiety and some form of OCD. Ive noticed that every so often i would get into a fixation on something ive done, or something ive fearwd i might do, and obsessed over it for days or weeks or even months, constantly. This time around, this has manifested as a fear of not actually having feelings for my girlfriend, whom i was very happy and excited to be with before. Now its early in the relationship, but it just feels like im in a doubtful slump i cant shake. This is made worse now that ive added a fear that i may be a psychopath or sociopath to the mix, which ive been obsessing over constantly and researching incessantly. I keep feeling like i cant feel empathy for people or love or emotions, or that i dont really love my family, or that i dont have the right emotional responses when things happen. Although thinking more rationally im certain i do or at least did before this. I feel like im living a lie with my family and my girlfriend because of these thoughts, like im ashamed of myself for leading them on that i care, when all i want is to truly feel like i do, but i just feel detached and worried I might have one of these anti social personality disorders. I just try to act happy and go with it hoping for it to pass soon. I was even looking up purposefully sad songs to see if i could cry, which i managed to do a little bit, to reassure myself i could feel something. But then my mind comes back and tells me "what if even that was insincere"? I do plan on seeing a doctor for my anxiety and possible OCD soon, when i muster up the courage. I just want to be more "normal" and feel happy again. Please any advice would be appreciated, and sorry for the wall of text.
Update: my girlfriend just broke up with me because i came clean about how i was feeling, or rather, not feeling. She said i had just lied and used her for sex todsy even though i knew i was going through this. That was not my intention, i guess i was just trying to act ok not to upset her or ruin the relationship, and hoping it would go away soon, really i wasnt too excited for sex with all of this on my mind but i did it anyway because i almost felt obligated i guess. But now i question maybe shes right and i, maybe subconsciously, was being manipulative. Well she broke up with me and i feel like i should be more upset but really i dont feel anything. This reinforces my suspicision that i am a psychopath or something. I dont want to be like this. I want to feel something