[chipperdear]

I'm pretty sure I have a hemorrhoid. I had one once before (external), and it started bleeding quite a bit for a few hours. I ended up throwing on a maxi pad and not moving for a good 6 hours. The bleeding slowed enough so that I didn't have to use a sick day at work, and luckily went away after a day. I think it's back, but its not bleeding (yet). Unfortunately, the experience I had last time has me in anxiety mode. All I can think about is it getting worse and starting to bleed like it did before while I'm at work. I would have to walk around the entire place past about a hundred people to find the manager to A) explain the issue and B) ask to go home. Chances are I'd have to do an accident report of some sort to cover themselves in case I had to go see a doctor. Meahwhile, my pants would be covered in blood. There's no way I could go back to work there. I'd have to find another job. Finding a full time job with benefits that I can support myself on is next to impossible to find in the area. In panic mode at the moment and not sure what to do. I want to cry just thinking about it. I'm also out of maxi pads, so I'll have to run to the store tomorrow and get some and hope nothing happens while I'm there. Going to have to wear one the next few days just in case, but not sure how much it would help with the way it started bleeding last time. Really hoping this goes away over night, but I know it won't and I'll have to deal with it all tomorrow. Doing my best to not ball my eyes out.

[whatbeanbelieved]

Chipperdear... that sounds really scary and I don't blame you for being anxious at all. One of my lasting fears for some odd reason is that I'm going to have an "incident" while sleeping (a la Trainspotting) and it drives me crazy anxious. I've had a hemorrhoid once and I think it's one of the most unsettling experiences ever. So many many hugs to you to begin with.. and I hope you know you're not alone. This is very normal and happens to a lot of people. It is indeed very embarrassing, and can be frightening from the social perspective.

In the first place, you need to get to a doctor. That's the most important thing, to take care of yourself and make sure you are healthy.

In the meanwhile, maybe you can think of a short term solution until you can get to the store to get a maxi pad or get to a doctor. Such as, toilet paper, or a wad of cotton, or even some extra padding of any kind.

Love
And hugs
Bean

[chipperdear]

It hasn't started bleeding yet, I'm just worried that it will.

[whatbeanbelieved]

That was what I had understood. I did however assume you were worried because of a physical sensation or something like that - which perhaps I should have checked... To add to my clarity, would you be willing to explain why you are worried it will happen?

Hoping everything works out,
Bean

[chipperdear]

Originally Posted by whatbeanbelieved

That was what I had understood. I did however assume you were worried because of a physical sensation or something like that - which perhaps I should have checked... To add to my clarity, would you be willing to explain why you are worried it will happen?

Hoping everything works out,
Bean

Sorry for the misunderstanding. I'm worried that it will happen, but no signs yet that it will. Just one of those things that sparks my anxiety and makes me panic.