[Annonymous1]

I have been dealing with depression for years now. I am almost 17 And only recently it evolved into anxiety. Servere anxiety that consumes my life, my body and my mind. I feel like my heart is pounding out of my chest and the only way to get it out is through suicide. Ill tell you why..

My parents had relationship issues for a long time. that caused them not to pay much attention to me. I fell into depression and I felt like I needed someone. I was 14 when it started. I ended up getting into relationships with bad guys who only used me, and left me. I ended up having sex with 5-6 guys. Two of them when I was dating my current boyfriend. (We hadnt met eachother in person yet.) When I met my boyfriend I lied and told him I was a virgin. Because I Was a stupid kid. So two years later (only a week ago) I decided to confess to him about my past, and cheating. He ended up staying with me, and he wants us to move forward together. But the thing is. We cant move foward because I cant get over my past. It kills me. I feel guilty and anxious and horrible every day. I feel unworthy, and tainted. I feel like the lowest of the low. It kills me. The only way I feel like the pain will ever stop is through death. Ive tried everything to deal with this. My mother is studying to be a counselor and even she cant help me. What do I do? How can I get over these feelings?

[Piraeus]

Only time will heal a broken heart.
Are you taking any kind of meds now?
You should discuss this with people that you trust.
It's just going to take time.
Good luck

[lancetrot]

Hi
You need someone to share your feeling who can understand you and support and guide you in this situation. when you share, you will get some relief. Teenage is a stage when teens need support and guidance from their parents to pass through.That did not happen to you. Death is not going to solve the issue. Dont lose your heart. Learn practicing yoga and meditation will keep your mind peaceful and clear.

Goodluck

Please put the suicide thoughts out of your head.
You're young and have plenty of time to get yourself strightened out w/ the problems you are facing now.
I should be the last one giving advice to anyone, but it hurts me when i see the word > suicide.
we all get more mature as we grow at differant stages.
You kinda gotta write it all off, and turn to the next page.
I know you'll get through it, and you will be happy again.

"If your heart is not empty, how can someone fill it"