Severe Health Anxiety

For as long as I can remember, I have had very bad health anxiety. I remember being 5 years old & getting a little chest pain & staying up all night so I wouldnt die from a heart attack. Now I know that the pressure I felt was a panic attack.

As I got older, the worries went from heart attacks to cancers to HIV to germs, you name it, Ive thought I had it. At the moment Im stuck on Dvt. Even though 2 months ago, a doppler ruled it out, its still keeping me up at night. Ive been having severe, full blown panic attacks all throughout the day. I am constantly checking & rechecking my leg. The other night I stressed out about it so much, I gave myself a horrible migraine. It was so bad that noise was making me throw up. Even though the only symptom of Dvt that I have is pain & the Er told me its sciatica causing it, its like Im obsessed with my leg. I have varicose veins & they cause such anxiety, that I cant hardly look at my leg without getting scared. I feel stupid.

My aunt gets blood clots in her legs all the time & told me that blood clots make your leg itch. Well lo and behold, my leg is now itching. I dont know how to make this stop. Im at my wits end. I try to be logical about it. I know the itching is probably because I shaved my legs today & my skin is just dry from that, but the more I try to reason with myself, the more anxious I become. I start thinking "Well sciatica dont make your calf hurt" or "Varicose veins mean a blood clot" even though I know varicose veins are secondary. See? My thoughts are so back & forth & disjointed.

Im so tired from lack of sleep & the panic attacks wear me out physically & emotionally. I.cant function like this. I have a doctors appointment with a new Gp Tuesday to see about an Mri. Im hoping he can help alleviate my fear of this pain in my leg. But waiting is so hard. Is there any advice yall have? Please?

Its a stormy sea and the waves are high and low. Have no fear. Be at peace. Be still and calm here in this present moment. This will pass. You have the power within you to heal yourself.

Anxierty needs meds. or cbt to kill it, personally after having CTB i would chose meds. If you think your going to die of some obscure illness every day, WWWWWWWWWWell you keep wakeing up so your not , just say that to yourself.

I don't have those extremes but I know people who do. I have had something similar but to a far lesser degree. Anytime a thought like that pops into my head I just basically say **** it... if it's real I'll either die or wake up in the ER but I'm not going to let it interfere with what little normality I have
If it alleviates your anxiety to keep going to doctors trying to find something wrong then so be it. Have you thought about when you will finally accept a diagnosis?
If this has been a problem since you were 5 and you are reasonably healthy you may want to consider therapy for hypochondria.

Sewerrats, Ive tried thinking like that but my mind is set on bad thoughts, or so it seems. Its almost like I have an obsessive compulsive disorder of some kind. My phobias have gotten so bad, that Ive stopped eating a lot of different foods. I cant drive due to a phobia of fainting behind the wheel & hurting people. Its just frustrating. I was on low dose 2mgs Valium but I wanted to combine it with CBT but my pdoc just didnt ever try to do the Cbt. He kept just giving me 15-20 minutes once a month. So I quit going to him after 3 years of half *** therapy. That was in Nov. Hopefully Tuesday, my new Gwill help me find good psychotherapy.

George, Ive tried telling myself that, too. But its not death that scares me, its the thought of leaving my kids & husband. It seriously freaks me out. Ive been in & out of therapy since I was 7 years old for Ptsd & panic disorder. Im 32 now. Thats a lot of therapy. I tried to bring up hypochondria with different docs, most recently with the Er doc, and they either crackva smile like Im joking, or they tell me hypochondria is a made up disorder. I wish they could wake up as me one day. Mabye theyll treat hypochondria as an actual illness. Its frustrating trying to explain it to GPs. No one understands it unless theyve felt this kind of fear. Its truly an all consuming thing. Im just so tired.

Today has been rough. About an hour ago, I hyperventilated and almost passed out. I dont have any anti anxiety meds so I kinda forced myself to take a flexeril hoping itll help the panic attacks & insomnia they cause....*sigh* hoping is all I do anymore

It sounds rough. I'm not sure what to say to you that might help. I'm pretty sure that hypochondria is a real disorder. It's a type of anxiety disorder I'd guess. The Mayo Clinic among other institutions recognizes it as a real disorder. Can your GP refer you to therapy for anxiety? If this is your first time seeing this doc chances aren't good that you will be prescribed an anxiety med but maybe he/she has some help to offer. I have a relative who gets blood clots often. I've never heard her mention itching as a sign and trust me I've heard every other sign/symptom she has She's the type of person who gets a headache and worries she has a brain tumor
Try not to read any medical books or watch any tv programs about doctors.
Maybe someone else with some experience in this will chime in.
Let us know how it goes next week.

Every one as a trigger that Can spark a fire in your head, server anxierty is one big trigger, me at one time could not whach any tv or read a newspaper. CBT to me was rubbish but its group theropy in england not 1-2-I ,antidepressants an benzos let my brain slow down so i could think for myself instead of the insain whirling spin dryer of bad thoughts in my brain 24-7

Im a little better today. Must of been the flexeril. I have a little vertigo from a Vestibular disorder but its not one of those things that send me into outright panic attacks. I would rather the doc refer me to a psychotherapist rather than benzos cause Im sensitive to them or something. Even half of the 2mg valium knocked me through a loop. Yall are great for taking the time to talk to me. Im grateful for my friends here on PC. Seriously there have been times I would of lost my mind if not for this forum.

It's just my opinion but I don't think that valium would have been the best med or even the best benzo for your problem. Therapy can be very effective for some but it's hit or miss and even with a very good therapist it's going to take a lot of time.

It definitely seems like it is really difficult to get people to take severe heath anxiety seriously.

I feel as though I have experienced much of what you have, but much less intensely.

Triggers: On a day to day basis, I will have troubling thoughts about potential pathogens or illness -- generally AIDS. I will think of the danger of getting a cut and thus having an open wound, or getting stuck with an inappropriately discarded needle, and that I could exposed to any number of diseases, such as AIDS. I have been working extra shifts and as a result my finger nails have become very weak from washing dishes and cleaning, thus fears of a hormonal balance surface. I will be disturbed thinking about tapeworms and the like. Lately I have noticed my teeth shifting due to my overbite, now I am afraid of potentially losing those teeth. Perhaps I should not deliberate further, I can see this discussion being very triggering.

Luckily for me, although troubling for the few minutes it persists, the anxiety normally does not wreck me. However, I have had extreme spikes in anxiety where I thought I had a tumor, cancer, the Lamictal Rash, and that I was pregnant, among others. These last for several hours for a few days. It is a terrifying form of anxiety.

I have noticed that online research can occasionally help but also make it worse. Sometimes you find symptoms you know you do not have; so then you are safe. However, most conditions have very broad symptoms such as fatigue, itching, etc -- you're guaranteed to have some of those. I think, overall, it is probably much worse to obsess over online information. I understand that there is this constant need to check, the need to list out the reasons why you might have something and why you shouldn't believe you have it.

I don't have advice for you. I can only tell you that I have experienced a bit of what you have, so I hope that helps you. I think it is very important to remind yourself that it is anxiety. This helps me because I know the specific preoccupations of my anxiety attacks will pass and my health anxiety will pass as well. I make myself remember how I feel when the attack is over and retrospect reveals that it was ridiculous. It will be harder for you if you experience it constantly. When your anxiety in general under control, you will cease to have such hypochondriac anxieties.

My anxiety waxes and wanes. I will feel at peace thinking about the potential for terrible health conditions at one time, only to fall apart at another. Having felt both those ends, I understand why it is very hard to be taken seriously by others. It is utterly ridiculous to others. I think we evolved to have protection in our minds to keep ourselves from over stressing about travesties that only could happen but likely won't. Even though it seems "logical" to be aware of risks, it makes for a much healthier mind to not have those fears. Being afraid of death seems so logical to me, but others are not bothered. It is because we simply aren't meant to crush ourselves with these thoughts.

Take care of yourself. A little bit of health anxiety is good for you -- strive to eat well and exercise and I hope that will help assuage your fears. I'm going to go brush my teeth before they fall out.

the AIDS phobia hit almost everyone that had unprotected sex in the 80tis when it became big big news, jesus i had sex with lots of ladies and felt the same, I was a regular blood donor and are tested every donation. plus if you go in mental hospital the first thing you get is a rack of blood tests , for aids hepititis ,std ect ect .These illnesses and anxierty can be guilt phobia it was with me anyway. You have phobias , I used to have hundreds you have to deel with them 1 at a time. No theropy can help because soon has they solve one you move to another, ocourse haveing anxierty is bad news but i deal with that in ways i would not recommend. Its a case of saying F*** this why should i stand for this ********

Thanks sewerrats.
My Aids phobia started when I was really young. My mom had a hysterectomy in '85 & had hemoragged and recieved 11 units of donor blood & soon after, you started hearing about Elizabeth Glaiser on the news & how she, along with her son, were in infected by donor blood. My mom had to be tested every 4 months for 2-3 years before she was cleared. I was 4 years old at the time. Then my moms freakishly religous brother told me that if I kissed my gay uncle on the cheek that I could get the "fag disease". My uncle didnt have it but being so young I didnt understand. I thought all gay men had it. So I would stay awake at night in fear that I had become infected cause my uncle was (stil is) my best buddy & I kissed him all the time. Since then, there hasnt been a sexual relationship that didnt send me into Aids panic. My doctor has a policy that when you first see her, you get tested for all stds amd Hiv. I explained to her this phobia, and she said safe sex is always the best route but just in case you have unprotected sex, that they are finding out more everyday about the transmission of the. virus and the it is transmitted at a rate of a 2% chance out of 1000 male/female exposures. Although a woman can pass it easier than a man. I dont know why. I guess periods or something play a role in that. Im just all messedd up in the head these days. I hope this post made some sense. My thoughts are so scrambled and racing anymore. I cant think straight.

Hi George. Yea Valiumm depresses me & makes me have crying jags. I try to avoid it unless Im in a full blown runnin around panic attack. Honestly, Klonopon (sp?) works the very best. It stops all of my anxiety but doesnt make me feel depressed or drunk like Valium & Xanax does. But Im afraid to ask for it cause I dont want to look like a drug seeker.

And ((((Odee)))), your response in no way triggered me
It helps knowing that Im not the only one & theres someone who understands & can sypathize....

That's exactly what I was thinking. I don't feel any effects from clonazepam except the lessening of anxiety and clearer thinking...sometimes
I understand that a lot of doctors have a fear of dependence/addiction to anxiolytics and pain killers but it's gone too far when medication isn't prescribed purely for political reasons.I think there may be more than a bit of OCD in hypochondria. Maybe your doc can prescribe something that will help. I hope so

That Klonopon also helped me concentrate. I agree with you on the political influence in these crazy new prescription limits. My illness is documented from 1989 when I was 8 till now. Its not like Ive taken advantage of my Panic Attacks in order to recieve drugs. Ive never failed a drug test or anything. But healthcare providers in Ky are so scared of the Dea shutting them down that theyre afraid to do their jobs. Its a real mess here & from what Ive been reading over in Chronic Pain, its like this in a lot of states. It makes getting mental healthcare frustrating. Cause you go to your doc for help only to be given 4 different kinds of pills that have nothing to do with anxiety. I had a pdoc actually give me blood pressure pills for my anxiety to avoid writing a prescription for benzos. My Bp is already low (90/62). Its crazy. Just plain nonsensical

My std phobia stems from sleeping with to many women to remember , and guilt i had 4 kids with different girls by 21 ,2 i never see. i punished myself , and my guilt turned to phobia, i have nuked it now but i would never sleep with another other than my wife, even if it was scarlet yohanson , i still flirt with ladies an there has been many times i could have had sex but i wont. the first time i do i will die of guilt., i mean it. if i were you give blood on a regular basis, your not infected so you help someone and get tested at the same time after a while you will think i sayed someone and myself at the same time, i dont go now do to hospital meds not shrink meds but i have a siver pin for 10 donations and my wife has the gold pin has she is o neg a much needed blood. take care and that will solve you prob.

Thats great youve found a way to stop the Aids/std phobia. I cant donate blood due to severe anemia. Idk why cause its iron anemia not like, red blood cell anemia. I dont think. Anyhow, I try to rest my mind by reminding myself that if Im perfectly healthy. My bloodwork always comes back normal well, not counting the anemia.

I hate this happened to you and hope you
can get to the root cause.