[fireturtle]

I'm a 26 yo male. The last 4-5 years I've been terribly paranoid about my health, the last two years especially is when it really got to the point of full-fledged hypochondriasis. I am especially scared to death of cancer. My mom and aunt were diagnosed with cancer about 2 years ago (luckily both survived, but the chemo took a toll on their bodies), and I just feel you hear so many stories of cancer taking lives too early. Even most TV shows seem to have sad stories of loved ones lost to cancer, and these are just fun shows I watch with my wife like What not to wear, House Hunters, Say Yes to the Dress (no shame!) I also remember reading a report that said 1 in 3 people will get cancer in their life, and I'm just scared to death of it. I feel I would rather be hyper vigilant than not worry, but everyone agrees I take it too far, I worry myself literally sick over worrying!

The last 3 years, my health hasn't been too great. Really bad strings of layoffs and unemployment, sports injuries, 60+ weight gain over 2 years, depression and anxiety, panic attacks, high stress, etc. I get random aches and pains, and have had ongoing stomach issues for months (9 months now of very slight discomfort and inconsistent bowel movements) I feel like a 50 year old! I've probably went to doctors about 15 or more times in 2013 and had different tests and blood work done, but all comes back I'm generally healthy other than being overweight. There's more major tests I haven't done yet like stomach ultrasound and colonoscopy, but doctors don't feel they are necessary yet. (plus they are costly and we've already done some costly tests to begin ruling things out from the bottom up before diving into the bigger tests) Stomach issues were labeled as Irritable Bowel Syndrome, but never confirmed. Doctor feels other aches and weird symptoms are ALL from the stress and anxiety. Despite there professional thoughts, I never feel reassured. I still feel this lingering feeling of something terrible happening, but I also feel it could all be in my head.

I really do need to start exercising again, but I've been really down in a hole with depression and stress for a long time, and it's easier said than done. In many ways the internet is my worst "friend" as well, because I'll experience a weird pain or symptom, and Google likes to label it as the worst case scenario of something terrible like cancer. I admit my hypochondriasis is a big problem, but I find it hard to stop worrying about my health in fear of missing something that could have been treated if caught early. Nonetheless, I worry myself sick and let terrible thoughts of health issues consume me. I remember once I noted a mole on my face I've had for years was a bit painful to the touch. I freaked out and immediately began crying melanoma, it's melanoma, oh my god no! That night I ended up throwing up I made myself so stomach sick and was in tears over the thought of it. Next day I saw a dermatologist and the mole check came out perfectly fine. Ironically, the mole that was painful had a pimple growing next to it! But that's just one example of how badly I worry.

How can I stop worrying about my health? How can I ease up?