[Moshi]

It has been a long time (4 years) but last May I finally started paid work (2 hrs/week). However, the combination of new work style, new rules, and the continual visits from siblings and family meant that I was exhausted by the time the 2 week summer break came round.

I also completed a good art course with a group and I had high anxiety and I was stressed each session. I could stop talking and talking etc.

I did the activities I had to do to cope with anything, you know, deep breathing (especially when driving to clients), yoga, walking, writing lists and processes, updating diary and calender, and putting a prayer up to God or thanking God for everything. By the end of 2013 my sleep pattern was bad and a few times I had to take a Valium to keep calm.

However, there is something that is troubling me ... sometimes, when I want to speak no words come out. My lips are moving but no words. Or, my words are all jumbled up when I speak. I put it down to all the newness of last year and having to cope with family stuff, but it has started happening again and I am not stressed.

Does any one else have this?

[maruf]

I have experiences in dealing with people, including communication and talking. And this difficulty is not rare, I've heard from people about this. Do you experience lack of confidence in what you're trying to say to others? Or maybe you try to perceive others more than being yourself?

[purplemystery]

I definitely have this problem too. I sometimes find it hard to explain myself or to know what to say. I might struggle to find the right word or even avoid telling a story because I'm afraid I'll mess it up by losing my train of thought part of the way through. It happens when I'm nervous, but sometimes it just happens period. I've also wondered why this is, and I think my best guess is that a part of my mind is occupied on something other than what I am saying. If I'm thinking about how others perceive me or trying to plan what I'll say next as I'm talking, then this tends to jumble up my speech. Do you think this could be the case with you too? I know I need to be more mindful and present in conversations.

[Moshi]

Originally Posted by maruf

I have experiences in dealing with people, including communication and talking. And this difficulty is not rare, I've heard from people about this. Do you experience lack of confidence in what you're trying to say to others? Or maybe you try to perceive others more than being yourself?

I am not still not sure why I am like this.
I think that even though I do all I can to get rid of the thoughts, ideas, past conversations etc. in my brain and embrace the new experiences, the combined pressure from external groups and internally stresses me out. So that like the end of last year I was a wreck - totally stuffed.
This in turn makes me get intimidated or hyper or knowledgeable or just a pain in the neck really.

Actually, it is when I am really stressed I can't stop talking but I think if I glued my lips together I could stop talking.

[Moshi]

Originally Posted by purplemystery

I definitely have this problem too. I sometimes find it hard to explain myself or to know what to say. I might struggle to find the right word or even avoid telling a story because I'm afraid I'll mess it up by losing my train of thought part of the way through. It happens when I'm nervous, but sometimes it just happens period. I've also wondered why this is, and I think my best guess is that a part of my mind is occupied on something other than what I am saying. If I'm thinking about how others perceive me or trying to plan what I'll say next as I'm talking, then this tends to jumble up my speech. Do you think this could be the case with you too? I know I need to be more mindful and present in conversations.

I am beginning to understand that when I am pre-occupied with the activity I am doing currently and then talking with someone else for a period of time while working then my memory is basically not there.

I must be too hard on myself, which is what a lot of people tell me that I am. I believe it is that rotten "perfectionism" coming through again. Also, it occurs when I am in a situation where I cannot just 'open-up' because it is either work or course etc.

Hopefully by the end of this year I won't be such a wreck.