[megitsune]

Hello, I'm new here at the website. I'm a teenage girl (not a native english speaker so please excuse my english) and I'd like to be a psychoterapist one day. I used to explore and learn about psychology a lot even before I noticed that something was wrong with me. Then I noticed how I have many symptoms related to anxiety and depression. So, I started researching more about it, and now I'm completely sure I have some major anxiety issues. For example, I often feel sick to my stomach, tremble, have headaches, experience anxiety attacks and my heart starts beating fast, all for no real reason at all. Things that I usually did with no problem, are now almost impossible for me. Is it just because of stress? I have a lot on my back, I am a straight A student in both ordinary school and music school, but feeling pressured by my mother. My family situation is horrible both my father and brother are addicts, and around three months ago my father was diagnosed with cancer. I don't even know where my brother is these days, he's in too deep. I don't have friends, my classmates are all acting really bad towards me. My self-esteem is too low, and everyone's giving me **** about it, like I'm the one to blame for that. I hate myself and I feel like a nuisance to everyone. I've been self harming regularily and having some seriously violent thoughts, not only about myself. Now, if you read all that, would you please help me? Like, simple breathing exercises, or things I can do to improve my self-esteem? I don't want to feel like this, it's suffocating. Thank you.

[lizzyjb]

Hi and welcome. I am not native English too.
I think you should go therapy but as I can read in your post, I think you can't afford.
There's a lot of breath exercise you can do, some guided meditation that can help you. You can find it in the net maybe in your own language (I'm from Spain and I have find a lot of mp3 in Spanish that have helped me a lot, )
You can try mindfullnes too, a kind of meditation. John kabatt zinn has good books and audio that can help you. Theese are in English.

[pisces22]

My therapist just showed me some breathing techniques. She told me to inhale and exhale and as I exhale she told me to relax my body. I've been trying it but I don't know how effective it is in the long run. You should try it. Like lizzyjb said, there's a lot of resources online that can help you control your issues. I also have a lot self esteem and social issues. I'm taking therapy and hopefully I can learn how to get over those things as well. Good luck to you!

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Hello Megitsune: I read your post as well as the replies you received. I noticed that lizzyjb mentioned Jon Kabat-Zinn & mindfulness. There are many videos on YouTube related to the practice of mindfulness as well as other techniques. You could go to YouTube yourself & find these. Otherwise if I had a more clear idea of what you're looking for, I could post a link here on PC to something that might be helpful, since I have a YouTube channel.

When I first read your post, I thought that maybe you were just imagining that you have the types of problems you were reading about. This is common among psychology students. Medical students also tend to imagine that they have every disease they study about. But, as I read further it became apparent that you really do have some mental health struggles going on. I, of course, don't know what is available to you where you live. But, if you can arrange to get some therapy, I think this could be helpful. The sooner you can begin to address the issues you have, the better. But, under any circumstances, keep posting here on PC. It's a great place to find on-line friends & get support as well as to find needed information. My best wishes to you.

[chlo-bo19]

There are many selfhelp things online which have helped me! Well done for carrying on

[Aquarius7]

Google Kim Eng breathing meditation. It is on youtube along with a lot of other good ones. I use this all the time.
You are not alone, and not a bother! You can help us as much as we can help you. Just remember, you do not need to be perfect. Having straight A's is great, but if school etc. is causing stress, it will affect you and your life. Give yourself a pat on the back for being able to put up with the difficulties you are facing. We are all human and have problems coping from time to time. You are obviously a very intelligent and nice person. I'm glad you posted!