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#1
Sep 29, 2014, 12:11 AM
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I'm 22. I currently work as an at-home telemarketer for a company that sells things I don't care about. I don't have a college degree because I'm scared of going into debt or taking out a loan and having to pay it off for the next 5 years. I live with my 68 year old dad but I'm planning on moving out and buying my own house as soon as I save up for a down payment, and I'm even planning on moving to another state but this won't be for another year or even two. I'm scared to get a "real job" where I have to drive to work every day, interact with coworkers and customers face to face, and stay there from 9-5, I am very shy and just plain scared of this. I was super lucky with this at home job but its all on commission and its a struggle. The last job I had was in retail and I quit after 2 months because it was hell for me. I have nothing on my resume except a volunteer position I did when I was 18. I feel like I'm wasting my life or not doing what I should be doing like getting a degree or having a "real" job. My mom makes me feel like crap about this and my dad even comments about me still living with him. I'm so depressed right now I'm about to cry. I feel like a total loser. I just broke up with my boyfriend yesterday because I wasn't in love with him and he was a good guy. I can't believe my life right now, I don't know what to do. I'm scared and feel stuck. I'm terrified of "growing up" and actually being out on my own, but I crave the freedom so bad. I got in a fight with my dad tonight and I feel like ***** because I went off the handle and yelled at him, even though he helps me as much as he can. I'm so lost...
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"Re-examine all you have been told, dismiss what insults your soul." - Walt Whitman "Never be a spectator of unfairness or stupidity. The grave will supply plenty of time for silence." - Christopher Hitchens "I do not fear death. I had been dead for billions and billions of years before I was born, and had not suffered the slightest inconvenience." - Mark Twain |
 Irrelevant221
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#2
Sep 29, 2014, 02:15 AM
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Hi CosmicRose, you're definitely not a failure. Have you considered therapy?
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“All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi Diagnosis: Schizoaffective disorder Bipolar type PTSD Social Anxiety Disorder Anorexia Binge/Purge type |
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