Cant give up, Wont give up!

hi,

I have an anxiety disorder. My Doc says i am Hypochondriac. I don't know if thats a 100 % right, coz thats my affliction. Theres always a part of me that says "what if...he's wrong, and it all goes spiralling downhill from there. Every desire and passion that burns inside me, they all get tested every day, i say, I want a family of my own, feel loved and spread love, and my mind puts a thousand hurdles in front of me. Like what if i cant control the anxiety and seeps into my professional life, i'll lose my job, who'll marry an unsuccessful person and on and on it goes. Im sure you all are pretty much familiar with this loop of thoughts and counter-thoughts that runs endlessly inside your head.

The harder part is that I'm literally in it alone. I live in India. There are no support groups, no psychologists (sure there are people studying and researching and teaching psychology, but no one is actually helping people, none that ive found) . We do have psychiatrists, who prescribe pills without explaining the side effects or how it'll work. Ive had to learn it all myself. After a year of going through ****** shrinks, ive now found a decent one. so one good thing is that i'm finally on the right meds.

My parents or the society here has literally no clue about how to take care of people with mental illness. My friends and familly's way of helping me is, by telling me to " Be Happy" , "dont think negative thoughts". Thats about all the help i get out here.

The only thing keeping me going through all of this is this part, thats buried deep down inside of me, that sometimes gets temporarily inaccessible when clouded by threatening thoughts, yet it always lets me know that, like your heart, even if you cant hear me some times its still there, this part of me that refuses to let go of the belief that good things will happen no matter what, refuses to give up hope, even if noone comes for help.

This piece of writing is the same stubborn resilient part of me, asking for help, looking for hope, a sliver of light in this state of darkness. I dont neeed much, id settle for a friend whom i could talk to every once in a while. Someone who's going through, or have gone through, a similar experience, who understands what its like to live with this sickness. Someone who hasnt given up hope altogether. Maybe if light could find light and it'll shine a little brighter.

Hello Ravdeep Singh: Welcome to PsychCentral… from the Skeezyks! I hope you find the time you spend here to be of benefit.

PsychCentral is a great place to get information as well as support for mental health issues. There are many knowledgeable & caring members here. The more you post, & reply to other members’ posts, the more a part of the community you will become. Plus there are social groups you can join & chat rooms where you’ll be able to connect with other PC members in real time (once your first 5 posts have been reviewed & approved.) Lots of great stuff! So please keep posting!

P.S. The Skeezyks celebrates that part of you, deep inside, that won't give up! Please nurture that...

Well trust your instinct not doctors .If your hearts tell you something have faith in it

Thanks appreciate the advice.

Hello and welcome. I'm relatively new here myself.

How frustrating to not have any treatments available in your county. What is the point of studying and researching if the end result isn't to help people?

Your worry that you may be misdiagnosed isn't necessarily a bad thing because it happens all the time. Also, I've known some hypochondriacs and this always seems to go along with something much more complex, so your doctor may not be seeing the complete picture.

I was misdiagnosed and the treatment I received from this made me worse. Because of this, I'm going without a therapist right now, although I plan to find a new one eventually. I just want to be sure I learn how to find one that really knows what they are doing when it comes to my real problems.

In the meantime, I have discovered Pysch Central and can tell you that so far I'm finding it very helpful. If you spend time here reading posts and participating in discussions, going to support chats, you will get much out of your time here.

I suggest you get in touch with DocJohn, who owns this website as he may have some suggestions about ways you can get treatment. For one thing, I know that there are therapists who will treat people using Skype. He may be able to connect you with someone who does this, or tell you how you can find someone who does.

I understand DocJohn is hard to get a hold of, but he holds a general question-and-answer support chat every two weeks, on Tuesdays. You could certainly talk to him there. Check the Calendar for chat information. (If you have programmed your correct time zone into your profile, when you check the Calendar for information on the chat time, the time listed will be correct for your zone.)

It's great that you are so stubborn and refuse to give up. I'm pretty nonfunctional from my illness, but also believe things can get better. Our illnesses are in our mind, so it's important we have the mindset that we can heal. The foundation of recovery is being able to see that you can recover.

--Ceara1010