[BlueMoonBlueEarth]

I hope posting this isn't a mistake.

I've been a member of Psych Central for three years but have barely made over fifty posts due to my anxiety of being judged. This is one of the safest sites I've seen online, but humans are complex creatures and there's always going to be people out there who enjoy sewing discord a.k.a. trolls. As a result, I have barely commented in my three years of being a member here. I'm so frightened of negative feedback and would rather avoid it all.

Truth is, a few years ago somebody made a post on this very site describing themselves as 'the only real person in the world'. The post got a few comments ranging from cool acquiescence to negativity, and I myself made a slightly snappish reply, telling them they didn't think of the consequences of writing a potentially offensive post before hitting 'Submit'. To this day I still wonder if I did the right thing and if I hurt their feelings. Thinking of my comment makes me feel like I deserve to be judged and condemned.

I want to talk about my issues, but I'm too afraid. But then, I thought "What if I talked about my anxiety of posting instead?" Still, I feel scared right now thinking of what kind of comments I might get. I've come out to people in the past looking for help, and received only scorn in return.

[SvanThor]

You won't be judged... I promise.
Everyone is ****ed up, everyone has their own flaws.
No one is going to overlook their own just to judge you for yours.

[Sunflower123]

You won't be judged. I haven't found that to be my experience at all. The people have been kind, understanding and supportive. If someone is on the off chance being negative you can ignore them and you won't see their post anymore. Sending big hugs.

[Guiness187055]

Nobody is going to judge you post away.

I understand what you're talking about, to some degree. I've kind of had to force myself to be active on this site (it got easier after a while). Even right now, I'm a little concerned that I'm posting in a sub-forum that I've never posted in. I feel like it isn't my place to just show up and start talking. But your post struck a chord with me.

I've sent a few private messages here and there on PC, and even though each one was met with friendliness, I still am asking myself if it was okay that I took that step and initiated a conversation. I'm always questioning if I did the right thing, or if I just ended up irritating people.

Fortunately, the trolls and such seem very few and far between on this site. I really don't think anyone will be judging you for making this post. I'm happy you did, too. If you feel like it some day, tell me your story. Zero judgement here.

[Fuzzybear]

I'm happy that you posted. There will be no judgement from me

[Unrigged64072835]

No judgment from me either.

[BlueMoonBlueEarth]

Thank you so much for the kind responses, everyone.

[reb569]

Yes, post away. This is a very safe environment and I enjoy my time here.

I think there are a lot of people on here that feel the same but just have never mentioned it. I myself end up deleting a lot of posts before I submit them because at times I feel my responses aren't overly helpful due to emotional numbing, or just not being in a "place" where I'm able to effectively communicate what I want to say.

[scarlett35]

I had some of the same worries as you but through posting more I've found everyone has been really supportive. Not one person has judged and even when posts have been a little... offensive, people have given comments in a really nice helpful way, acknowledging that the person who wrote it was hurting!

You'll be fine here. Post away

[boogiesmash]

No judgement. We are all here to try and be better and to support our peers. I encourage you to post often, it is part of your support group.

[feeshee]

I'm glad you are here, Blue.

[Samadhi]

Originally Posted by BlueMoonBlueEarth

Truth is, a few years ago somebody made a post on this very site describing themselves as 'the only real person in the world'. The post got a few comments ranging from cool acquiescence to negativity, and I myself made a slightly snappish reply, telling them they didn't think of the consequences of writing a potentially offensive post before hitting 'Submit'. To this day I still wonder if I did the right thing and if I hurt their feelings. Thinking of my comment makes me feel like I deserve to be judged and condemned.

The fact that you feel remorse for posting something that probably wasn't that harsh shows me you are a very nice and caring person. Believe me when I say it, no one here is going to judge you here, we all do bad things, we've all made big mistakes, and we've all felt regret. We all care about you here, and opening up to your problems is a very brave step to help your anxiety. I was scared to post on forums for years on end, but when I started posting, I realized it wasn't as bad as I originally thought it was, it wasn't hostile, it was very supportive, I even got thanks from people and very kind replies for my posts. I hope this helped, and I hope things get better for you too. Have a great day!

[boogiesmash]

Blue how about this. Tomorrow you read the forums and post in at least 2 threads. Saturday bring it up to 4 and Sunday 6. Feel free to read every post you want but you have to post the minimum for the day. Mon do 8, tues 10. Wed do 12 and create your own thread or two. How's that sound? Anybody maybe wanna tweak it?

[scarlett35]

Originally Posted by boogiesmash

Blue how about this. Tomorrow you read the forums and post in at least 2 threads. Saturday bring it up to 4 and Sunday 6. Feel free to read every post you want but you have to post the minimum for the day. Mon do 8, tues 10. Wed do 12 and create your own thread or two. How's that sound? Anybody maybe wanna tweak it?

I think this is a great idea. Build it up slowly. If you feel like it's too much one day you could always stick at the same amount you did the day before I bet you find you get some great responses

I made an "angry" reply to someone because I was annoyed and she told me to get a chill pill. That's the only time I've had someone be rude to me but apart from that I've had mostly had a positive experience on here.

[FallDuskTrain]

Well, i am going to be very honest with you. You will not be judged but that does not mean that you will personally not perceive a feedback as judgement. Does it make sense? If you are this sensitive of being judged, there is a possibility that you might end up thinking that you are judged when in fact you are not.
On the other hand, here is somewhat an opposing view: When a member (OP) initiates a thread on PC and reveals something intimate about her/himself, the OP also has to acknowledge that not every single reply will be what she/he wants to hear. There may potentially be some feedback that challenges the OP’s thinking and it okay. In fact, I personally embrace a challenging perspective as long as it comes from a caring and a kind place.
I guess what I am trying to say is that not every response will please the OP’s ego and that is a beneficial thing.
We are here for you.