[Loose Screw x 2]

I'm not going to say what it was because it's too personal to me to fully open up about it at this point but, the effect that it had on my was that I tried to ignore it at first and tried to just push the feelings and thoughts away until the movie ended which was soon, thank goodness.
After the movie ended I got up off of the floor because I was nervous and was being bombarded by negative feelings and fears about what may have happened to me as a child and my suspicions about all of that. I felt anxiety and depression coming my way and suddenly there was a pretty intense fear that a blocked memory from my childhood was about to show up and even though I couldn't see it, I had a feeling that I knew what it was and that just about sent me into a panic because I didn't want to see it and "V", one of my supportive alters had to calm me down and I was nauseated too but, had to force myself to eat to counter the depression that was coming over me and growing by the second. I ate some ramen noodles because that helps me to feel better when I'm depressed and afterward I still couldn't shake the depression and took a nap for about an hour and a half or so and when I awoke I did feel better and had my self control back to almost normal.
I just want to know if anyone else has ever experienced anything like this with the fear, dread and panic of a long ago, unseen memory threatening to show itself and if it could possibly be an indication that I was abused in some way that was so bad that the memory of it had to be blocked. I see my T in two days but, I don't know if I can hold out that long. Any advice would be greatly appreciated and thank you in advance.

Mav can I suggest you post this on the PTSD board too? I'll chat with you in a bit as well.

Originally Posted by MavriforceK9r

I'm not going to say what it was because it's too personal to me to fully open up about it at this point but, the effect that it had on my was that I tried to ignore it at first and tried to just push the feelings and thoughts away until the movie ended which was soon, thank goodness.
After the movie ended I got up off of the floor because I was nervous and was being bombarded by negative feelings and fears about what may have happened to me as a child and my suspicions about all of that. I felt anxiety and depression coming my way and suddenly there was a pretty intense fear that a blocked memory from my childhood was about to show up and even though I couldn't see it, I had a feeling that I knew what it was and that just about sent me into a panic because I didn't want to see it and "V", one of my supportive alters had to calm me down and I was nauseated too but, had to force myself to eat to counter the depression that was coming over me and growing by the second. I ate some ramen noodles because that helps me to feel better when I'm depressed and afterward I still couldn't shake the depression and took a nap for about an hour and a half or so and when I awoke I did feel better and had my self control back to almost normal.
I just want to know if anyone else has ever experienced anything like this with the fear, dread and panic of a long ago, unseen memory threatening to show itself and if it could possibly be an indication that I was abused in some way that was so bad that the memory of it had to be blocked. I see my T in two days but, I don't know if I can hold out that long. Any advice would be greatly appreciated and thank you in advance.

so sorry you got triggered by the movie.

do try and tell your therapist when you see them, it will help to talk about it.

for now, I suggest trying to find something funny to take your mind off it

when I get triggered by a movie, I usually resort to trying to find some humor of some kind to replace these feelings.