[Emma09865]

I've been having bad anxiety since I was about 8-9, and recently (over the past two years or so, roughly) it's gotten increasingly worse.

I've had derealization/depersonalization on and off for about three months, probably due to panic attacks. It's started to get a lot, a lot better (until the past few days, when it's been coming back, but that's pretty normal), but now something else is happening:

Even on days where I don't have it all and am fine and mostly happy, it comes back at night. Everything looks the same (instead of muted out, etc.), but it just feels different and surreal, and I can't have the lights on, or it gets much worse.

I'm just wondering if anyone else has experienced this? Another common thing I've been having, even during the day, is just feeling like my episodes of derealization have changed my view on the world forever, and even now that it's mostly over, nothing will ever be the same again.

[Skeezyks]

Hello Emma: I'm sorry I can't really comment with regard to your concerns. However I noticed this is your first post here on PC. So... welcome to PsychCentral.

Here are links to 11 articles, from PsychCentral's archives, that offer suggestions for living with anxiety & panic attacks:

Anxiety Disorders - Learn the Symptoms & Treatment

Living with an Anxiety Disorder

9 Ways to Reduce Anxiety Right Here, Right Now

15 Small Steps You Can Take Today to Improve Anxiety Symptoms

Top 10 Lesser-Known Self-Help Strategies for Anxiety

https://psychcentral.com/blog/the-bi...ng-my-anxiety/

https://blogs.psychcentral.com/culti...panic-attacks/

https://blogs.psychcentral.com/dysfu...in-its-tracks/

https://psychcentral.com/lib/tips-to...-attack/?all=1

https://psychcentral.com/blog/10-way...-panic-attack/

https://psychcentral.com/blog/5-more...ng-with-panic/

I hope you find PC to be of benefit.

[MickeyCheeky]

I'm so sorry you're struggling, Emma09865 I'm sure other people here at PC have had other experiences similar to yours. I'd suggest to talk to your doctor about this and see how it goes from there. Do you see a therapist? Maybe that could help. Please don't give up. Things will get better at some point. I'm so sorry you have to deal with this

[mulan]

I am sorry you have been sofering.
Being tired might be a trigger for deersonalizarion. That might be why it happens to you at night. I prrsonaly think that fake light from light bulbs helps to increase the sense of irreality.
I don't have any good advice, but as far as I know symptoms from anxiety as derealization might manifest themselves after what you call the crises, when everything should be fine.
Take care of your self and welcome to PC.