[OCD1972]

Here it is 3 in the morning and I can't sleep even though I'm tired. Tonight I'm obsessing over a mattress I bought 3 weeks ago that has turned out to be too firm. I can get 1 exchange and that's it. I don't feel nervous but I know this is anxiety. The older I get the worse aspects of my mental illness are. I take 4 psych meds and often sleep 12 hours because they make me tired. Well on nights like these even with the psych meds no sleep. I am sick and tired of being sick and tired. I'm glad that I'm closer to the end of my life than to the beginning. Being mentally ill for 47 years has been no picnic and it's exhausting. When I get spun out about something the insomnia hits. Or there have been times when I fall asleep for a few hours and then wake up. Occasionally when I get really happy it flips over into anxiety. I just needed to vent and it's way too early to call a friend.

[Fuzzybear]

hugs to you

[hope2010]

Originally Posted by OCD1972

Here it is 3 in the morning and I can't sleep even though I'm tired. Tonight I'm obsessing over a mattress I bought 3 weeks ago that has turned out to be too firm. I can get 1 exchange and that's it. I don't feel nervous but I know this is anxiety. The older I get the worse aspects of my mental illness are. I take 4 psych meds and often sleep 12 hours because they make me tired. Well on nights like these even with the psych meds no sleep. I am sick and tired of being sick and tired. I'm glad that I'm closer to the end of my life than to the beginning. Being mentally ill for 47 years has been no picnic and it's exhausting. When I get spun out about something the insomnia hits. Or there have been times when I fall asleep for a few hours and then wake up. Occasionally when I get really happy it flips over into anxiety. I just needed to vent and it's way too early to call a friend.

I know exactly how you feel about being so tired of being sick and tired.
My mental illness changed my life. I did not let them define me but I will be a fool to say that they didn't change my way of living.

I am sending you a big hug

[Skeezyks]

I'm sorry your life continues to be such a struggle. I'm 70 years old now. So I definitely am closer to the end than to the beginning. Not a day goes by I don't hope it all comes to an end sooner rather than later. I don't think it would be going too far to say being here on PC has a lot to do with keeping me going. I hope it can do the same for you.