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lark265
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Default Nov 27, 2020 at 08:47 PM
  #1
.I'm glad you're here. I just moved to a new place and am a bit more isolated now. I think my demons salivate when they see that. They stay away in the morning for the most part.....though I can still feel them chattering. Later in they day they emerge. If I have isolated or am presently alone in my new place, the messages that I am a loser and that anything I do in life will not alter that come on strong. I don't have any way to defend myself (other than getting drunk which is not an option). Do any of you feel this way? Do you wonder, "what the hell did I do SO BAD in my life that I deserve this?" Been to about half a million therapy appts. in my life (though I admit I have never really "committed" to it). I'm pissed off, it's not fair, etc etc etc. Maybe that's the main thing I do: I say it's not fair. It's not fair that that asshole over there has and keeps a great job he likes and has three happy kids and a nice spouse and good parents. And I guess once I compare myself like that I have already lost.
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Yaowen
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Default Nov 28, 2020 at 06:33 PM
  #2
Dear lark265,

I am so sorry you are in the situation you describe and I can definitely relate. Wish I knew what to say that would be helpful.

Sincerely yours, Yao Wen
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AzulOscuro
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Default Nov 30, 2020 at 12:44 PM
  #3
I didn’t understand you very well. You are in a new place, right?
You have a wife and three kids and a job you like?
I’m sorry, my mother tongue is not English and I’m a bit confused with your post.

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annoyedgrunt84
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Default Jan 21, 2021 at 11:00 PM
  #4
I can relate to those feelings, the thought that I'm a loser who has screwed up everything I ever touched. My voices chatter every time I have the slightest difficulty with a task, or when I'm alone at night. It actually sounds like you have a pretty good handle on these thoughts. It's so easy to compare oneself to others but try to keep in their lives are often not as rosy as it appears from the outside.

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Default Jan 30, 2021 at 05:04 PM
  #5
I tend to think I'm already on my second chance in life, so anything bad that happens to me, a part of me thinks that I kind of have it coming. I'm probably too harsh on myself, because I've never actually purposfully harmed anyone, but it does help with acceptance and possibly, acceptance helps with moving on. So I would gently push you towards acceptance in the hope that it too will help you move on.
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Default Jan 30, 2021 at 08:21 PM
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