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Default Jan 11, 2021 at 12:02 PM
  #1
I have a dental appointment tomorrow, and I am totally freaked about it.

I have had problems for years.I have a serious phobia concerning dentists. Problems so serious that I would go very long lengths of times without seeing anyone, and now I have implants. No teeth. You would think you wouldn't have to see the dentist with implants. Not true.

My dentist has physically hurt me more than anyone in my life ever has.. I have had moments that I held myself back from getting out of the chair and punching him. I don't hit people, so that was serious. At first he advertised himself as caring for people that were scared. He doesn't now. He's had problem with his practice, and I think he is taking his anger out on me. Once upon a time he was very kind, and he isn't anymore.

My children think it's funny that I'm scared and make jokes at me, so I don't tell them when I go. My spouse used to be helpful, and go to the appointments, but I think I have used up any compassion that anyone had for my situation. I'm supposed to face my fears myself now.

I don't know how to feel better. This is fairly routine tomorrow, but any visit is scary for me. I don't like facing him because he has become unpleasant, and because he hurt me so badly.

Thank you for reading my message. I just needed to get this off my chest.
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Default Jan 11, 2021 at 03:05 PM
  #2
Dear prettymccute,

I can TOTALLY identify with you. Dentists scare me like nothing else. I even have panic attacks before going to the dentist. I used to take a tranquilizer before going but then learned the hard way that tranquilizers reduce the effectiveness of the lidocaine use to treat dental pain. What you said about dentists causing you more physical hurt than anyone in your life is true for me too. My heart goes out to you!

Sincerely yours, Yao Wen
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Default Jan 12, 2021 at 10:48 AM
  #3
thank you Yaowen. I did not know that about the lidocaine. I did learn from experience that because I take pyschiatric drugs, the ones that help to relax you are less effective. I have had some serious work done (as in the implants) and portions of my gums removed. They required sedation. I believe I made my dentist mad when I told him that I was conscious during the procedure. I wasn't criticizing, it was no refection on his work. I only wanted to communicate that I was aware of what was occurring around me. I don't think he liked that I told him. Now I have to touch it through the difficult situations, and it's very hard when you are nervous before hand.

Thank you for listening to my situation. It really is very difficult to face fears when you lack support.
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Default Jan 12, 2021 at 01:47 PM
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Maybe you should find a new dentist? There’s lots of caring ones out there.

I don’t like the dentist myself but I’d rather go to the dentist than a gynecologist office. Now that is really painful for me. And super awkward for everyone.

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Default Jan 12, 2021 at 04:24 PM
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I have to take extra Xanax just to get through any dentist appointment. Even if I know them and have been going to them for years. I've had a lot of dental work done starting at a young age due to a calcium deficiency.

Many dentists will offer you nitrous or a sedative if you tell them you've got serious issues with visits.

You're not alone. Tell them about your fears. If they don't offer any solutions or options, then they may not be right for you.

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Default Jan 12, 2021 at 05:36 PM
  #6
My ex husband was so scared of dentists that he went under full anesthesia to get work done.

Maybe full anesthesia is extreme but some type of sedative isn’t out of the question. Call around and ask for suggestions from different dentists if you don’t trust yours. They must have some ideas!!!! i
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Default Jan 14, 2021 at 11:48 AM
  #7
Thanks for the input everyone. My spouse wants me to stay with this dentist since we've invested so much money there. The dentist has actually been very good about discounts and actually had to credit us several thousand dollars when a lab he was using closed during the process of my implants, so I see the sense of it.

I've actually thought of the sedation, but they seem to only be in favor of that when there is serious work done, as in teeth pulling and surgeries etc. I feel stuck with him, cosidering the money issue and respecting my spouse's feelings.

On a positive note, I did do well with my appointment. I was scared as --well, you know--before the appointment. It wasn't bad at all, and the dentist was pleasant yesterday.

Thanks to you all for reading, and understanding. It was very difficult, and I talked with my spouse for a bit about my fears on the way there. I imagine most people have fears and understand what it's like to have to face them, so even if it's an easy appointment, it's hard to pretend it's ok when it's not.
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Default Jan 19, 2021 at 01:01 AM
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Glad it worked out well for you.

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Default Jan 19, 2021 at 06:05 AM
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I totally understand. I have had 4 impants and have been seeing the dentist and periodontist for 40 years; it never gets better. I have an excellent dentist and periodontist, but I am always so nervous every time I see them. My teeth are so sensitive, that I can't even stand cold water. Unfortunately, nitrous doesn't work.
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Default Jan 19, 2021 at 07:38 AM
  #10
My old dentist was excellent, careful not to hurt me but I was still nervous about routine checkups even so. In your case I would be looking for a new dentist, if they’re hurting you unnecessarily and/or can’t help you with your concerns. Good that this appointment went well, though.
It’s fine that you want to respect your husband’s feelings on this, and maybe you’ll decide you can stay with this dentist after all (I hope his treatment does improve so you don’t feel the need to find a new one), but I think his argument is based at least partly on the sunk cost fallacy. Just something to bear in mind.
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Default Jan 22, 2021 at 09:07 AM
  #11
if a dentist saw my teeth now, I imagine he (or she) would quit their day job. I don't think they are that satisfactory, and though they personally don't cause me many issues (they do sometimes), I think a dentist would have a diffrent story!.

I can't remember the last time I saw one
 
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