Family members who are anti-medicine

why98 · Sep 20, 2021 at 08:36 PM

How do you deal with someone who is against psychiatric medicine? My brother and I are very close and agree on most things. But he is so anti psychiatric medicine. He read that you can stop a panic attack by deep breathing, so he thinks that anti anxiety meds are unnecessary. I try to tell him that some people need both medicine and to do behavioral things to cope. He just gets angry and says I'm weak. It's very hurtful.

How do I deal with a person like this? I'd like to be able to depend on him when I'm having a panic attack, but I can't if he equates meds with weakness. I feel like there's no convincing him.

Yaowen · Sep 20, 2021 at 09:51 PM

Dear why98,

I am so very, very sorry you are in that situation. Since I am in a somewhat similar situation with a family member, I can definitely relate to what you must be going through. It is heartbreaking when people are rely on half truths and then use those to hurt the people who are near and dear to them. I wish I had some good advice for you, but sadly I don't. Many people are prone to oversimplification which is a fallacy that really brutalizes the truth. It is hard when one is related to such a person. So sorry I do not know how to help. My heart goes out to you. Please forgive me if my English is not correct.

Sincerely yours, Yao Wen

rjdb · Sep 21, 2021 at 01:18 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by why98

How do you deal with someone who is against psychiatric medicine? My brother and I are very close and agree on most things. But he is so anti psychiatric medicine. He read that you can stop a panic attack by deep breathing, so he thinks that anti anxiety meds are unnecessary. I try to tell him that some people need both medicine and to do behavioral things to cope. He just gets angry and says I'm weak. It's very hurtful.

How do I deal with a person like this? I'd like to be able to depend on him when I'm having a panic attack, but I can't if he equates meds with weakness. I feel like there's no convincing him.

Tell him to mind his business. Sounds like an a-hole.

why98 · Sep 24, 2021 at 01:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Yaowen

Dear why98,

I am so very, very sorry you are in that situation. Since I am in a somewhat similar situation with a family member, I can definitely relate to what you must be going through. It is heartbreaking when people are rely on half truths and then use those to hurt the people who are near and dear to them. I wish I had some good advice for you, but sadly I don't. Many people are prone to oversimplification which is a fallacy that really brutalizes the truth. It is hard when one is related to such a person. So sorry I do not know how to help. My heart goes out to you. Please forgive me if my English is not correct.

Sincerely yours, Yao Wen

@Yaowen, your English is very good. Thank you for your response. It is really hard when you're related to the person, because I expect my brother to be more supportive. He is my big brother after all. I hope your situation changes for you.

sarahsweets · Sep 24, 2021 at 04:01 PM

Hey @why98:

Quote:

Originally Posted by why98

How do you deal with someone who is against psychiatric medicine? My brother and I are very close and agree on most things. But he is so anti psychiatric medicine. He read that you can stop a panic attack by deep breathing, so he thinks that anti anxiety meds are unnecessary. I try to tell him that some people need both medicine and to do behavioral things to cope. He just gets angry and says I'm weak. It's very hurtful.

To put it simply you dont deal with someone who is anti-psyche meds if you can help it. Have you firmly told him how you feel? And I dont mean just telling him that you need meds and that its not so easy for you, I mean looking up something for him to read or to share with him, and laying down a boundary?
Something like "brother it bothers me that you feel the way you do about mental health meds. if you think taking them makes you weak then do you think I am weak because I also take them? We can no longer have discussions about mental illness and its treatments because I feel like your anti-med stance and lack of support for my struggles means that we will never agree. I'd appreciate you not discussing this with me anymore".
Once you lay it out like that or some other way the next thing is to come up with a consequence or bottom line and then stick to it.
"if you do not stop bringing this subject up then I will have to limit the time I spend with you or talk to you because I am trying to be well and your outdated and antiquated views on meds are making it really hard for me."
Just my opinion.

How do I deal with a person like this? I'd like to be able to depend on him when I'm having a panic attack, but I can't if he equates meds with weakness. I feel like there's no convincing him.[/QUOTE]

*Beth* · Sep 26, 2021 at 05:44 PM

I'm sorry you have to deal with your brother's anti-med beliefs. My husband is anti-med, which leaves me feeling awfully isolated. The best advice I can offer is to stay away from the subject. If it unavoidably comes up say, "We don't agree on this and I don't want to ruin our time together, so let's not discuss it." Or something like that.

*Beth* · Sep 26, 2021 at 05:45 PM

btw- be sure to seek support from people who do understand your need for medication. It's so important to have peer support.

why98 · Sep 27, 2021 at 10:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sarahsweets

Hey @why98:

To put it simply you dont deal with someone who is anti-psyche meds if you can help it. Have you firmly told him how you feel? And I dont mean just telling him that you need meds and that its not so easy for you, I mean looking up something for him to read or to share with him, and laying down a boundary?
Something like "brother it bothers me that you feel the way you do about mental health meds. if you think taking them makes you weak then do you think I am weak because I also take them? We can no longer have discussions about mental illness and its treatments because I feel like your anti-med stance and lack of support for my struggles means that we will never agree. I'd appreciate you not discussing this with me anymore".
Once you lay it out like that or some other way the next thing is to come up with a consequence or bottom line and then stick to it.
"if you do not stop bringing this subject up then I will have to limit the time I spend with you or talk to you because I am trying to be well and your outdated and antiquated views on meds are making it really hard for me."
Just my opinion.

How do I deal with a person like this? I'd like to be able to depend on him when I'm having a panic attack, but I can't if he equates meds with weakness. I feel like there's no convincing him.

[/QUOTE]

I told him how I felt but with no consequence if he continues to condemn my path of treatment. That's a good idea!

why98 · Sep 27, 2021 at 10:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BethRags

I'm sorry you have to deal with your brother's anti-med beliefs. My husband is anti-med, which leaves me feeling awfully isolated. The best advice I can offer is to stay away from the subject. If it unavoidably comes up say, "We don't agree on this and I don't want to ruin our time together, so let's not discuss it." Or something like that.

@BethRags, that must be difficult to deal with. What you sugget seems like the right thing to do. I think it would save a lot of fighting and heartache in the future.

convalescence · Oct 24, 2021 at 02:19 PM

I second @BethRags advice

You do what works best for YOU!

Oct 25, 2021 at 05:03 AM

I don't really have a good answer for you.

my mother was the same, and actually threatened anyone who tried to say I needed it, even scaring them off her property

it was sad really, because if she was accepting, I could have got help a lot sooner

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Family members who are anti-medicine

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Beth catches the flowers Member Since Jul 2019 Location: Downtown Vibes, California Posts: 15,701 (SuperPoster!) 4 23.7k hugs given	Sep 26, 2021 at 05:44 PM #6 I'm sorry you have to deal with your brother's anti-med beliefs. My husband is anti-med, which leaves me feeling awfully isolated. The best advice I can offer is to stay away from the subject. If it unavoidably comes up say, "We don't agree on this and I don't want to ruin our time together, so let's not discuss it." Or something like that. __________________
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Beth catches the flowers Member Since Jul 2019 Location: Downtown Vibes, California Posts: 15,701 (SuperPoster!) 4 23.7k hugs given	Sep 26, 2021 at 05:45 PM #7 btw- be sure to seek support from people who do understand your need for medication. It's so important to have peer support. __________________
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convalescence Member Member Since Dec 2014 Location: USA Posts: 473 9 106 hugs given	Oct 24, 2021 at 02:19 PM #10 I second @BethRags advice You do what works best for YOU!
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Anonymous32451 Guest Posts: n/a	Oct 25, 2021 at 05:03 AM #11 I don't really have a good answer for you. my mother was the same, and actually threatened anyone who tried to say I needed it, even scaring them off her property it was sad really, because if she was accepting, I could have got help a lot sooner
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