how to help anxious online friend?

I got a online friend who when she gets anxious about her work, her boyfriend or her studies she floods me with emails asking for reassurance, she doesn't seem to look back through past reassurances before emailing me, she can email me da after day asking the same thing, even when I respond she gets into a "are you sure, are you sure your sure" and so on thing


Me reassuring her doesn't seem to help for very long


We are in different countries so only have online contact




How can I help her that will actually help? Online friend I mean

I put what I think is the trigger round thing but it might be the angry face I not sure

Online relationships (even friendships) can be very different from real life. It is easy to pour out our heart & soul to another person when we can't see them, but it can also be harder to know if they are sincere.

If you have a real connection with this person, then I would strongly encourage you to talk to him about how you are feeling. Try not to worry about overloading him. Often it is easier to talk to someone about mental health if you know they understand how you feel.

If you want a real romantic relationship with him it would be worth sorting these issues out now before you commit. It's also important to look after yourself. Do you have people that you can talk to about your depression and anxiety?

We are just friends, both female, no relationships

She's in freakout mode in emails now, I can't wade through them all just yet, she's sent at least 10 from when I started work to now

Please, tell us a little more. What does she think is her problem? Ir if she wasn’t very clear in this aspect, what she complains about?

She basically freaks out about stuff like her boyfriend not knowing the right things to say to her (it sounds to me like he's a "fixer" in other words he tries to fix problems that she tells him about, instead of just letting her let it all out)

She also freaks out about whether or not her work and studies will go well each day (i cant help her with her studies, i'm less educated than she is, plus my learning difficulties mean i would not be able to understand what her assignments and stuff was anyways)

I’m sorry a lot for replying so late. Have been health problems but your friend was in my head.
Poor girl, she must be feeling without control over what’s happening in her life. And also feeling that she’s not accomplishing expectations and she punishes herself.
I think that’s by she lies on you. At least, to feel some kind of reassure she can’t get from people who are closer to her. I’m not criticism these people, please, take my words with good intention. It maybe simply that these people don’t know how to help her or maybe she can’t connect with them in this sense to find some comfort or she may be ashamed. There may be many explanations. No criticise at all.

I wish I could know how you could help you. I know you have tried many things. Any way, if it may be of any consolation. Sometimes, the fact that you hear her, it may be very helpful for her. On another side, I’m sure that fact triggers things up in you, however, you are there.

It’s a pity she doesn’t want to see a professional. These people together with the ones who went through the same problems as her and took their time to dive deep on what they were going through, the ones that can help her more.
I think this is the reason why forums like that exists. I have a friend with a similar but more severe psychological issue than me and I received a lot, a lot help from this person. You can’t guess.
Hope this happens a lot here among us.

From what your friend told you she may has Ptsd. Do you see as a good idea to post your thread also in the forum about PTSD? (If it does exist. I’m not sure)
Many people who posts here know a lot about PTSD. But, they know a lot. I have read their posts and maybe they can help with what they know.
Let’s see if all together can help a little to her.