[darkfeary]

I feel constant impending doom and hopelessness. I am terrified of aging and dying obsessively and constantly. I am 48. I tried everything but nothing helps.

I am constantly worried about my health. I am paralyzed in fear. I cannot function. I am afraid that I will die soon. I have severe health anxiety.

I need to heal for my kids! They need me!!!! Psychiatric medications makes me worse. I cannot find ANYTHING to help me.

I am scared of everything. I have no life whatsoever. I have nothing to do all day. I lost my driver’s license, cannot find a job, have no friends or partner. My kids are 17 & 13 and are independent and busy with their own lives and I hardly see them. I am useless to them. I share half custody with my ex-husband. I have so much trauma from domestic violence and abuse by my ex-husband and recent ex-boyfriend. I have no schedule or routine or safety or certainty or comfort or hope.

I am constantly bracing for death every second. Please help me!! I have no idea what to do.

It is absolutely impossible to get over this fear of aging and dying. I feel like I have no purpose or meaning to my life.

PLEASE HELP ME. I cannot continue this way. I have so many issues. I have no idea what to do. Please help me!!!!!

[am6985]

We are here to talk with you and help you. How has the medication made it worse? Have you discussed that with the doctors?

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[Skeezyks]

I'm sorry you are having such a difficult time. Anxiety, fear & paranoia are things I struggle with a bit as well although not to the extent it sounds like you do. Unfortunately, I don't have any secret remedies to share with you. The technique I employ to deal with my own concerns is one that is referred to as "compassionate abiding". It's a Buddhist technique thoroughly delved into in the writings of the American Buddhist nun Pema Chodron. However, here's a link to a mental-health-oriented description of the practice:

Relieve Distress By Allowing It: Compassionate Abiding 101 | Mindset: Perspective Is Everything

Given what you wrote, though, my inclination would be to say this technique may not be adequate to address your concerns; and I would think seeking the help of a skilled mental health therapist might be the way to go. My best wishes to you...

[darkfeary]

I just cannot find the proper solution anywhere. I tried all medications and many other treatments but no results. I really want to end my life. It is silly too unbearable to go through this even one more day.

[ArmorPlate108]

Hi darkfeary,

I wish I could reach through the computer and give you a hug. You sound like you have gotten lost in the forest of anxiety and are trying to find a way out. It's tough. So much of what you spoke of was something that I can relate to.

In the past I used cognitive behavioral therapy to start quieting down the anxieties, though mine have come up a bit again. I've been talking to another member on a different board about the book I used to work through my initial anxiety (I was paralyzed with fear and agoraphobic). If you are interested, I can post some of that information. I credit this woman's work with changing my life- and I was feeling pretty hopeless at the time.

I also have a teenager and she is one thing that keeps me going. Hopefully we have that at least.

Sending you all the love and compassion that can come through the forum...

[darkfeary]

No way to heal or get better for me at all. No way to conquer an intense fear of aging and dying and feeling in danger every second!!!!!!!

[ArmorPlate108]

Sending you thoughts and prayers. I am so sorry that you are feeling this way.

I am also sorry you are feeling like this.

hugs if wanted

[Marie123]

Would you consider getting therapy?

[MaverickLovesYou]

Very sorry for your high anxiety. I know the feeling. You should ground yourself with logical reasoning/self-talk. Like tell yourself you've lived up to this day & will most likely tomorrow, which proves your thoughts of dying are irrational fears. That one has helped me a lot.

Also "allow it". It's from the book Dare. When you feel anxiety, tell yourself you allow it, you allow the anxiety to hang around & continue going about your business. That gives you control & should lessen your feelings of anxiety