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darkfeary
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Default Dec 21, 2022 at 04:27 PM
  #1
I am 49. 18 years with this obsessive relentless fear of aging, disease, dying. Impending doom and dread the future constantly. No effective treatment or solution. I tried everything. I simply do not want to ever age and die. My mind just will not allow it. I do not want my looks to fade and they already have. This fear never will let me live. I wish I could end my life.
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Default Dec 22, 2022 at 02:53 PM
  #2
I'm sorry you are struggling with this. I hope that, in some way, you may yet find a path to inner peace.


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"I may be older but I am not wise / I'm still a child's grown-up disguise / and I never can tell you what you want to know / You will find out as you go." (from: "A Nightengale's Lullaby" - Julie Last)
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Default Dec 22, 2022 at 05:50 PM
  #3
Quote:
Originally Posted by darkfeary View Post
I am 49. 18 years with this obsessive relentless fear of aging, disease, dying. Impending doom and dread the future constantly. No effective treatment or solution. I tried everything. I simply do not want to ever age and die. My mind just will not allow it. I do not want my looks to fade and they already have. This fear never will let me live. I wish I could end my life.
I'm so sorry you're feeling like this, @darkfeary.....If you feel comfortable sharing, do you perhaps have a therapist you could talk to about these fears?

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Diagnoses:
Major Depressive Disorder (treatment-resistant)
Anxiety/Panic Disorder (treatment- resistant}
OCD (treatment-resistant)
Agoraphobia (treatment-resistant)
Chronic Insomnia (able to sleep with current medication)
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Default Dec 23, 2022 at 06:26 AM
  #4
Seeing a therapist might be able to help.
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