[doodlecat]

When I was young I was diagnosed with ADHD, and its sort of been a constant source of headaches in my life. For the most part my mom never put me on medication so I ignored anything having to do with ADHD my entire life. Only now that I find my boyfriend has BP am I actually delving into research and learning that I'm actually still actively suffering from the symptoms of this neurobehavioral disorder.

My biggest problem has been pragmatic language impairment (shiny new word I found on the web, but it fits exactly what I've been going through). I have difficulty recognizing voices and a hell of a hard time following and making sense of long conversation. Fast conversation, forget it. After a few moments all the words just sound like nothing. I can't get any meaning from them, and once I realize this is happening I panic and then lose track of everything. To make matters worse my boyfriend snaps very easily, as is common with BP though he's getting medication and seeing someone now. So my anxiety that I'll set off his BP always makes me anxious and unwilling to talk, which makes him snap anyway. It's been tough, and I'm trying to communicate this to him, but for all his experience handling his own disorder, for some reason the vices of mine are hard to believe for him. I don't know if that's a BP thing or not. But it makes just talking to him so difficult sometimes. We're not always like that though, just during situations where I know I have to pay attention to a song or watch something satyrical (which I have immense difficulty with).

Mostly I wish I knew what to do about this. How to fix it, or cope with it, or convey whats going on better. It helps to have a word to associate it with but with all the back and forth of taking care of my boyfriends BP its hard for me to find time to focus on my own problems. I'd like to see a therapist at least, but I don't even know if I'm covered for that or if one could even help me with this. Ugh, I guess I'm just at a loss right now.

[Travelinglady]

Hi, doodlecat, and welcome to Psych Central! I am wondering if your boyfriend is being treated for his borderline personality. Or do you mean bipolar? I want to know for sure before I answer.