40mg of Vyvanse is too low and 50mg is too high

My doctor put me back on 40mg of Vyvanse from 50mg because I feel like the 50mg was depleting my dopamine yet 40mg isn't enough and I have to take a 1 hour nap every evening on it. I'm wondering if I should just live with 40mg. He and the pharmacists let me keep the 50mg pills so I can test which one is better.

I took 40mg of Vyvanse this morning instead of 50mg.

Took me an hour and a half to get out of bed. Feel less focused but also less "crazy" - If I can put it that way.

50mg yesterday morning gave me depersonalization but not derealization last night when it wore off because my focus was so bad during the crash so I went to bed at 12am to prevent a panic attack from lack of focus. The night before that, I was taking 40mg and tried to play guitar that night (The night before the morning that I took 50mg) and I couldn't focus. When I took the 50mg, I woke up and played guitar for an hour! I also didn't take a nap in the evening..

I don't know which is better. They both have negatives and positives that fulfill each other. 45mg would be perfect but that doesn't exist.

I met a student doctor and he was very interested in my dissociative panic attacks (Made worse by psychedelics even though I had positive effects from them in my life and don't regret taking them) and Vyvanse. He said one of his patients was having panic attacks and he couldn't focus so he put him on Vyvanse and it worked (His panic attacks went away).

"DPDR disorder produces a disturbing sense of detachment from one's body or surroundings, often as a result of psychological trauma. DPDR shares high diagnostic co-morbidity with attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) due to overlap of clinical features such as inattention and lack of cognitive inhibition."

My moms friend with bipolar and ADHD zones out all the time, always on her phone in the middle of a conversation and we have to shout her name and catch her attention for her to talk to us. She has ADHD way worse than me. I think she gets depersonalization because she gets panic attacks too and she's usually the one to tell me at the dinner table with everyone because we always talk about mental health. This is why she loves cocaine so much because it helps her. It's not her fault.