[wadoido]

Hello. I have a relative who lives with me whose father was autistic and mother is schizophrenic. I can't tell if he is normal and lazy, or affected by either of what his parents had.

He refuses to see a psychiatrist because he hates talking to strangers and he is also too lazy to get up and go anywhere unless it's life or death. He just stays home and sleeps or plays video games and nothing else. He literally never leaves the house unless forced to by necessity.

He won't live at his real house because he hates our family. Specifically, they have habits that annoy him until he is enraged and storms out of the house. Small habits like talking when he doesn't want to hear a voice or burping. He says he hates everyone and doesn't like me either, but he lives with me because I'm less annoying than the family in his real house.

If he gets annoyed he is silent and won't even respond to people speaking to him, he just folds his arms and pouts until they leave. He has failed job interviews because they asked him uncomfortable questions and he pouted until they hung up. When I ask him to do something he doesn't want to do, he will tantrum by crossing his arms and pouting until I leave the room.

He cares a lot about the impression people have of him, even down to the clothes he wears. He won't wear certain clothes if he thinks someone will criticize it. He is too shy to even reply "hello" to strangers, he won't call people on the phone or order pizza, he absolutely refuses to see a doctor. He talks about joining school again, but he failed the last two times he tried to go to school because he wouldn't do his work. When I put him to get a job, he just ignores me. I think it's because he's too shy to do more interviews.

When I try to get him to go to a doctor he pouts and changes the subject and tries to do anything to make me forget about asking him to call a shrink or set up job interviews.

I honestly am sick of this behavior and I can't take it anymore. I let him stay with me because I feel sorry for him, but he is ungrateful and doesn't care how much you do for him, he still hates you and gets mad and pouts when he doesn't get his way. It doesn't matter how much I spend on him he still acts like he runs the house and gets mad when I enter my own house when he wants to be alone or when I speak to him when he wants to play video games uninterrupted. At the moment he's pouting because I asked him to actually get up and do something (we're out of food, I asked him to buy some bread) and not speaking to me.

When I say that I won't be around forever and neither will the other family, and he will need to take care of himself eventually, he just says oh well i'll just kill myself when that happens.

He also says very cruel things and expects you to just accept them and doesn't care if anyone's feelings get hurt other than his own. He will make me feel guilty when I talk about sending him home (you're abandoning me, you lied, ect) but when I say it hurts when he says he hates me he just replies oh well that's just how I feel.

Is this a symptom of autism or schizophrenia or is he just a spoiled brat? I'm willing to work with mental illness but if it's just selfishness then I think I am done with it, period.

[Turtleboy]

could be all three, autism and schizophrenia can often be co morbid and both are on a scale of severity, but it sounds like he certainly seems to have an attitude too, i wouldn't put up with it, mental illness or not, get him to a therapist and if he pouts send him home, just my 2 cents,

[-jimi-]

Well it is very possible he inherited a bunch of genes that makes him quite unable to cope with things well. I think there is more than just bad habits going on.

Schizophrenia can make you very, very passive. People can even inherit those genes without having the obvious symptoms of schizophrenia. Some schizophrenias are negative symptoms only. Being so frightened socially he would maybe be diagnosed with something like schizotypal (not that I "believe" in that diagnosis personally...).

You are correct he probably needs health care. It's very hard to make people go against their wishes, I know that first hand. I'm not sure about what system you have over there, but if he could be assessed at home that would be easier. IDK if a social worker could help where you're at?