The other day I was crying in my room & I was beating myself up because I have no social life! I'm labeled an Autistic person. To be labeled an Autistic person makes me feel depressed I'm diagnosed with Autism spectrum disorder ASD or Aspergers which is an old diagnosis name. I fear judgment & the stigma surrounding Autism. Some people don't understand Autism, they need to have a perspective, put themselves in other people's shoes. There is something wrong with me the fact that I have no social life at 22 years old. I've never had a girlfriend either & I'm a virgin which is not a big deal to me. Sex is not all that cracked up to be. But I only mention that because having Autism can make it difficult to socialize with people especially woman I never really hang out with people. I tend to be by myself, I'm an introverted person. I compare myself to many people & I feel inferior. Other people who don't have Autism have more of a social life than me. Growing up I was a dweeb. In school I had no social life I didn't hang out with kids outside of school. I'm a young buck 22 years old I know I have my whole life ahead of me but I don;t know how I can live the best life with no social life I need help how can I have more of a social life with Autism?

It's ok if no one hears me out

I do have contradicting thoughts. One side of me is saying have sex & another side is saying sex is not that cracked up to be. Sex or losing your virginity is not that big of a deal in life. There is more to life than sex in other words.

Not only do I have ASD, but I also have depression & I have had history of anger issues, & I have some ocd tendencies. The best thing for me to do to be less depressed is to get out of house & not isolate so much. I have to remember keep in mind that Getting out of house socializing with positive people is really beneficial

[Apollite]

^ Depression is very common in people on the spectrum; I suffer with it very badly from time to time. It is incredibly hard when you are trying to function in a society that values a mindset that is completely alien to your own. I'm in my 30s and female, so my general experiences will differ to yours but I understand your predicament.

I've never had a boyfriend either and it didn't really bother me when I was in my 20s, but once I hit 30 it worried me. I wish that I'd made more of an effort to socialise when I was much younger instead of shutting myself away, because your youth is such an important time regarding your emotional development. You're only 22; that's so young, you have a lot of time to get your life together.

Do you have any friends or relatives you could talk to? Do you go to college? I know you are an introvert but are there any autism groups you could join? They may be beneficial to you. I live in a small town in the UK and there are no such groups where I live unfortunately, or I'd be happy to give them a go.

Have you heard of Wrong planet? It's a forum for autistic people and you might think about joining. There are lots of young men your age on there, some of whom have girlfriends and social lives, and I think they would be better qualified to give you advice.

[Anonymous37919]

I don't have one either. I see a 56 year old friend a lot, although he's very picky. Sad!

[avlady]

I feel for you, my brother and sister in law found out that their son is autistic and is only 6 yrs old. She the mother works with these types of people too. I hope and pray for you that you can join a group or meet someone who understands, i know you will. there must be alot of people out there in your shoes but they are hard to get to because they have the same fears you have. Do you have a doc or t? Good luck

[ptangptang]

Check out meetup.com, I'm guessing that in New Jersey there will be a social group for shy and socially awkward people. Good luck

[eskielover]

It might help to find activities you are interested it & get your social interface around that.

Honestly whether ASD or NT

I also have depression & I have had history of anger issues, & I have some ocd tendencies.

those tendencies would create problems in any close relationship. Until you can get that better under control, it will be difficult to find someone who is willing to have a close & intimate relationship with any person having those tendencies. Being ASD doesn't make anger issues ok any more than its ok for an NT to have anger issues. It tends to put off people rather than attract.

Work on these issues with your T....then maybe you will find someone you can connect with when you get involved in activities of things that interest you.