[Cowa2534]

I am a 31 year old female. I have some reason to believe I might be on the autism scale. I'm not sure what the proper and polite terms are, so I apologize if this post might seem offensive. I definitely do not mean to come across that way, I am just looking for help. I have had sensory issues with touch throughout my life, and it was not until recently that I noticed the severity and stopped to think, "This is not "normal.""

-I scored a 36 on the Autism / Asperger's Screening Quiz.
-I've been diagnosed with agoraphobia, generalized anxiety disorder, and depression in adulthood. I was going to go back to see about OCD, but the sensory issue is the one I notice affecting my life.
-I am overly jumpy. I have been asked by war veterans if I have PTSD due to how jumpy i am to sudden movements near me, loud noises, or someone touching me.
-I can not stand gentle touching. It makes my skin crawl. I need to be touched very firmly for it to not bother me. I have almost fallen down stairs do to being gently touched on my shoulders.
-I have been described as overly ticklish by all of my family.
-I am so clumsy. Could be my height as I am tall for a woman. I spilled almost every cup as a child bc I would knock them over. This was more than my cousins who were younger.
-My ears are so sensitive. I wore hearing protection a lot as a child to events that other kids did not.
-It feels as thought I can physically feel sound waves in my ears, which can be both nice are irritating.
-Was painfully shy as a child. I have memories spending a lot of time hiding behind my mom's leg in social settings, yet I crave community and belonging.
-I've struggled to make friends.
-I obsess over the things I truly love and care about.
-I obsess over dates. My wedding anniversary is 9-1-19, because it is a palindrome. Having a date that's numbers were patterned actually affected my wedding date.
-Numbers. I have obsessed over numbers since childhood while excelling in math.
-I struggled in college. Writing is very difficult to me. I am obsessive about perfecting what I say. I can't simply think a thought and write it down. I have to overly evaluate that thought to make sure it's even a logical thought to have. I don't mean "fact-checking". I mean evaluating it obsessively.
-I truly dislike fiction. It's a waste of time unless it is humor or emotionally comforting. I believe laughing is necessary, but the rest is not.

The problem is, I've struggled as an adult. I was smart as a kid. School was overly easy for me, until college. I struggle socializing and act out social situations in my head after leaving each one. I know I have terrible anxiety, but it feels more complex than that. The way I think is not "normal". My reactions are more irritable than they should be to simple changes in plans.

What do I do now and what would this mean for my future. I'm 31, and this is really starting to interfere with my life. Whatever "this" is. I get treatment through the Veterans hospital for my other issues, but I am not sure if they have help fro this.

[Skeezyks]

Hello Cowa: I see this is your first post here on PC. Welcome to Psych Central. Since you mentioned struggling with terrible anxiety the Anxiety forum, here on PC, may be of interest to you. Here's a link:

https://psychcentralforums.com/anxie...c-and-phobias/

We here on PC cannot offer anything in the way of mental health diagnoses. Plus I'm not a mental health professional. So I can't really offer anything insightful with regard to your concerns. I know you wrote you've been diagnosed with agoraphobia, generalized anxiety disorder, and depression in adulthood. You didn't mention, as I recall, if you're currently receiving any mental health services. If not seeking the services of a mental health professional, a psychologist or perhaps a mental health therapist, may be the best way to finally come to a conclusion regarding what's going on with you.

In the meantime here are links to 9 articles from PC's archives. The first 4 are on the subject of Asperger's Syndrome. The remaining 5 are on anxiety & ways to cope with it:

Asperger's Disorder Symptoms, Types & Treatments | Psych Central

Adult Asperger's: The Relief of A Diagnosis

Asperger's Syndrome

Debunking 6 Myths About Asperger Syndrome

https://psychcentral.com/anxiety/

https://blogs.psychcentral.com/life-...dium=popular17

https://psychcentral.com/lib/9-ways-...ere-right-now/

https://psychcentral.com/lib/15-smal...iety-symptoms/

https://psychcentral.com/lib/top-10-...s-for-anxiety/

I hope you find PC to be of benefit.