[ShyGuy7462]

So I just found out this last week that I am probably on the spectrum of Autism. I dont have an official diagnosis and there is a possibility that I dont have this disorder. But I came across a youtube channel that talks a lot about aspergers and autism and what its like to have aspergers and be on the spectrum and almost everything that was said and everything I have researched so far resonates with me so well it just makes too much sense not to be true. It explains all of my struggles and what I am going through. I dont feel the need to get an official diagnosis at least at this point. I am going to research this topic more and try to figure out what exactly I struggle with and what I can do to help me the most. Before I had no idea what was wrong with me or if there was even anything wrong with me but now I see that there are other people struggling with similar things as me and I have a name to research and find understanding.

[ShyGuy7462]

I dont think I stim and at first I thought maybe I am not on the spectrum because of that fact but I guess everyone on the spectrum is different thats why its refered to as a spectrum and that I can still be on the spectrum even if I am not exactly the same as anyone on the spectrum.

Now I do have problems with porn and masterbation and I am wondering if this could be considered stim. Any time I am depressed, anxious, or frustrated I usually have the urge to view porn and masterbate but I cant just do that whenever. I usually try to resist the urge maybe it builds and I give in when I have the oppertunity. I always figured that I used porn as an escape from depression and anxiety but could it have anything to do with Autism? Or could I replace porn for some other type of stim? If it is stim how likely is it for me to cut it out or stop doing it completely because Ive been trying to cut porn from my life ever since i started but I try to replace with some other type of stim instead?

[Skeezyks]

Best wishes for success with your research. I don't have any official diagnoses either. And realistically I know I don't need one at this late stage of my life. But I often think there would be some comfort in just having that label I could hang my hat on, so to speak. If nothing else, I'd then know which forum to post in here on PC.

[The_little_didgee]

This realization is life changing.

I discovered ASD/Asperger’s about 8 years ago. It seemed to describe my experiences, so I researched it in depth. Eventually I sought a formal diagnosis for healing and self-understanding. It turned out to be the right choice for me. - You definitely don’t need to go this route.

I’ve met a lot of people with ASD/Asperger’s. We are definitely different but there are similarities.

[Bat_Orchid90]

Originally Posted by ShyGuy7462

So I just found out this last week that I am probably on the spectrum of Autism. I dont have an official diagnosis and there is a possibility that I dont have this disorder. But I came across a youtube channel that talks a lot about aspergers and autism and what its like to have aspergers and be on the spectrum and almost everything that was said and everything I have researched so far resonates with me so well it just makes too much sense not to be true. It explains all of my struggles and what I am going through. I dont feel the need to get an official diagnosis at least at this point. I am going to research this topic more and try to figure out what exactly I struggle with and what I can do to help me the most. Before I had no idea what was wrong with me or if there was even anything wrong with me but now I see that there are other people struggling with similar things as me and I have a name to research and find understanding.

This is how I feel as well! I dont know if it’s better to do research or ignore it until I get an official diagnosis. I dont know how to seek an evaluation as an adult though:/ ive seen some people say go to a primary dr ( but i dont trust mine) but to have them refer me to a psych who specializes in autism/aspergers ... it just really sucks if youve gone so long undiagnosed that once youre out of childhood years, you kinda miss the boat :/

[Bat_Orchid90]

Originally Posted by The_little_didgee

This realization is life changing.

I discovered ASD/Asperger’s about 8 years ago. It seemed to describe my experiences, so I researched it in depth. Eventually I sought a formal diagnosis for healing and self-understanding. It turned out to be the right choice for me. - You definitely don’t need to go this route.

I’ve met a lot of people with ASD/Asperger’s. We are definitely different but there are similarities.

How did you go about getting a formal diagnosis? If you dont mind me asking..:/

[The_little_didgee]

Originally Posted by pandabear0927

How did you go about getting a formal diagnosis? If you dont mind me asking..:/

When I discovered Asperger's (by accident) I contacted my old psychiatrist, who felt an assessment would be very helpful in self-understanding. She recommended I either get assessed by a psychologist or psychiatrist. I ended up seeing a psychiatrist, since I couldn't afford the $1500 psychologist fee.

The psychiatrist I saw did ASD assessments. Mine was done over 4 appointments. We talked about my life, my developmental history and social difficulties. I filled out a few questionnaires and so did my mother, who was also interviewed to verify my developmental history.

Local autism organizations often have resources for adults who are interested in getting assessed.

[paladin313]

Indeed, what led me here is research on Autism Spectrum Disorder. Though I am an adult and a touch long on the tooth, particular things have led me to believe that I was misdiagnosed with ADHD as a teen and I've had what they used to call Asperger's. I grew up in a time where little, if anything, was known about the disorder. Let me tell you, my childhood was a living nightmare, and it is amazing I got out of it with any sanity intact. At first, I was curious about the matter, then I started to do some research. I presented this to my cousin who raised a child with ASD and now works with autism awareness groups. She and I were very close to one another growing up, so she knows quite a bit about me. I started probing about ASD with her and myself after she posted a poster dealing with signs an adult has ASD and were misdiagnosed or never diagnosed at all. For about 80% of it I could say was still true about me, and almost all of it was true in my youth. I have taken several diagnostic tests, including the one on this site, and all indicate a high likelihood of ASD. I presented that to her and she was all, "Yep, I always suspected that of you." Now, I am looking for a solid answers and I hope I can find them.

[paladin313]

Okay, so I've now began the process of narrowing things down and study. I am now %90 sure that I am on the spectrum, and that it is what was called Aspergers, and now I believe is called High-functioning autism. The whole COVID thing has made it hard for me to contact my doctor at the VA to get assessed, so I have to do what I can. My God, this has given me closure on many things, and it explains so much of why my childhood was a living Hell.

[Bat_Orchid90]

Originally Posted by paladin313

Indeed, what led me here is research on Autism Spectrum Disorder. Though I am an adult and a touch long on the tooth, particular things have led me to believe that I was misdiagnosed with ADHD as a teen and I've had what they used to call Asperger's. I grew up in a time where little, if anything, was known about the disorder. Let me tell you, my childhood was a living nightmare, and it is amazing I got out of it with any sanity intact. At first, I was curious about the matter, then I started to do some research. I presented this to my cousin who raised a child with ASD and now works with autism awareness groups. She and I were very close to one another growing up, so she knows quite a bit about me. I started probing about ASD with her and myself after she posted a poster dealing with signs an adult has ASD and were misdiagnosed or never diagnosed at all. For about 80% of it I could say was still true about me, and almost all of it was true in my youth. I have taken several diagnostic tests, including the one on this site, and all indicate a high likelihood of ASD. I presented that to her and she was all, "Yep, I always suspected that of you." Now, I am looking for a solid answers and I hope I can find them.

All the quizzes i took say im likely to be as well!!! The issue is as far as verification... no one knows im going on this journey to discover so when it comes to assessing my parents for my history.. they are not available... and the cost is so high :’( i feel like ill never get answers or help. Every place ive contacted for an assessment ignores me...

[paladin313]

Originally Posted by pandabear0927

All the quizzes i took say im likely to be as well!!! The issue is as far as verification... no one knows im going on this journey to discover so when it comes to assessing my parents for my history.. they are not available... and the cost is so high :’( i feel like ill never get answers or help. Every place ive contacted for an assessment ignores me...

Because I have the VA, I am sure I can speak to the counselors there. However, with the whole COVID thing going on, that's going to be a while before that happens.

[Bat_Orchid90]

Originally Posted by paladin313

Because I have the VA, I am sure I can speak to the counselors there. However, with the whole COVID thing going on, that's going to be a while before that happens.

You could always do virtual

[paladin313]

Originally Posted by pandabear0927

You could always do virtual

With who, and how much would that cost. Forgive me, but I am Scot-Irish by blood. I used to like to drink but didn't like to pay for it.

[ACJP]

With you in spirit I am in the same situation here. I had to start my own businesses just so I could work alone and avoid as many interactions as possible. Each time I try to socialize or have a conversation I am exhausted for hours and sometimes for the remainder of the day. I had to attend a meeting for business yesterday and by the end of the meeting I felt like I was shattered into pieces and needed to go home and reassemble myself. I always knew that I was very different but as I got older I realize just how different I really am. A family member learned about Aspergers as a job requirement and immediately knew that I had it. After reading about it myself I had no doubt and my score on the test was solid confirmation of what I already knew. I have kept it a secret for many years and sometimes just want to tell people so they understand that I just can't help it - I just don't want people to know. I was hoping to speak with others who have Aspergers so we can support each other in this sometimes lonely existence.

[paladin313]

Originally Posted by ACJP

With you in spirit I am in the same situation here. I had to start my own businesses just so I could work alone and avoid as many interactions as possible. Each time I try to socialize or have a conversation I am exhausted for hours and sometimes for the remainder of the day. I had to attend a meeting for business yesterday and by the end of the meeting I felt like I was shattered into pieces and needed to go home and reassemble myself. I always knew that I was very different but as I got older I realize just how different I really am. A family member learned about Aspergers as a job requirement and immediately knew that I had it. After reading about it myself I had no doubt and my score on the test was solid confirmation of what I already knew. I have kept it a secret for many years and sometimes just want to tell people so they understand that I just can't help it - I just don't want people to know. I was hoping to speak with others who have Aspergers so we can support each other in this sometimes lonely existence.

Well, over the years, (and they have been many,) I have been able to condition myself to be able to handle groups well, but I am not as drained as I used to be. However, the other shoe drops when in that situation: diareha of the mouth, and on one subject on which I like at that moment. The spotlight is on and now I am the star. It's just as draining, but at least I'm socalizing. However, it's not always to the liking of those there. With Aspy's, that can happen. I'm at the point where, if I am awake and have had a self talk before going into a situation, I can stay on my toes and keep myself from doing socially awkward things. However, if I am tired, or becoming so, its ASD default setting that kicks in, and here we go again.

[Mountaindewed]

Even though I was non verbal until I was 4, a classic ASD sign and I had behavior issues and sensory issues and everything It wasn’t suggested until I was 15 and I didn’t get an official diagnosis until my early 20’s. Now I’m 27 it’s on paper, and all my therapist talks about is “well you feel like this because of the autism, and it’s a sensory issues, etc” All my medical providers specialize in autism and no one will work with me who doesn’t specialize in it. I feel like my case is more then mild but not quite moderate. It bugs me I was diagnosed so late when it was obvious I had it my whole life.

[paladin313]

Originally Posted by Mountaindewed

Even though I was non verbal until I was 4, a classic ASD sign and I had behavior issues and sensory issues and everything It wasn’t suggested until I was 15 and I didn’t get an official diagnosis until my early 20’s. Now I’m 27 it’s on paper, and all my therapist talks about is “well you feel like this because of the autism, and it’s a sensory issues, etc” All my medical providers specialize in autism and no one will work with me who doesn’t specialize in it. I feel like my case is more then mild but not quite moderate. It bugs me I was diagnosed so late when it was obvious I had it my whole life.

I feel your frustration. Try being 50 and just finding out. I haven't had it put on paper officially, but all the signs are there, and every assesment I've found has me so clearly on the High Functioning area of the spectrum that to say this is not the case would be odd. All I'd need it for is something official that shows it. In any case, what was worse for me was they, like your era, knew nothing of the thing. They, in your time, knew a bit, but not what they know now. What I don't care for is them telling you that that's just your autism as if that was an excuse of some sort; that you can get away with certain things because of it. Well, depending on how severe it is for you, from my experience, though I can't change the wiring in the ol' noodle, I've learned to work around it in some areas and I am starting to learn how to turn things to my advantage. Yes, there are things that will never go away and will always be the default setting in how I function in this world, but that does not mean I can't work around it. I think we all can.

[paladin313]

Here's a thought. Knowing now that I am on the spectrum, (level 1,) I've been doing research. Of course, I have run into things that try to make the claim that ASD is fake, it's not real, it's just doctors trying to find ways to make more money--the usual nonsense. I have a cousin with a daughter who is now 21, but with a mind of a 13-year old, who is somewhere between levels one and two, and I have family that have put her through the wringer. They tell her she doesn't know what she's talking about, it's all nonsense, and they have been rather harsh and rude to her daughter. They tell her she just needs to get over it, to grow up, to stop hiding behind a fake disease, and that gets my blood boiling. It's worse that it's her own blood. It's really angering now that I know that I also am on the spectrum. Nevermind my cousin has binders loaded with data from doctors analyzing her daughter. How did all this, "It isn't a real thing," get started? I want to tell these idiots to spend time living inside my brain and then tell me what is and is not real. However, I want more sensible responses to give them and let them know they don't know about what they speak. (P.S. If I am ever at a family gathering and they start in on the pair, I'm getting inbetween them and warning them to back up or else feel pain.)

[RoxanneToto]

Anything along the lines of “X disease is fake/harmless” really gets my goat. As for the doctors making stuff up to get more money... it’s not like they’d actually be out of work if autism and all the other “fake” conditions didn’t exist. I know if I were a doctor I wouldn’t be making unnecessary work for myself!

[lark265]

Originally Posted by Skeezyks

Best wishes for success with your research. I don't have any official diagnoses either. And realistically I know I don't need one at this late stage of my life. But I often think there would be some comfort in just having that label I could hang my hat on, so to speak. If nothing else, I'd then know which forum to post in here on PC.

For years I didn't want to have Aspergers. Though, like the above poster said, it made a lot of sense that I did. I have always been asocial and felt F****** WEIRD about it. And thought I was flawed just b/c I didn't want to be around people much. But now I know. I admit I did want to either confirm or rule out a diagnosis so I went to Kaiser. A Psychiatrist there said "Autism Spectrum Disorder Level One." Used to be called Aspergers. It is STILL hard to accept but the more I start to accept it the better I feel......to be cont.

[Bat_Orchid90]

Originally Posted by lark265

For years I didn't want to have Aspergers. Though, like the above poster said, it made a lot of sense that I did. I have always been asocial and felt F****** WEIRD about it. And thought I was flawed just b/c I didn't want to be around people much. But now I know. I admit I did want to either confirm or rule out a diagnosis so I went to Kaiser. A Psychiatrist there said "Autism Spectrum Disorder Level One." Used to be called Aspergers. It is STILL hard to accept but the more I start to accept it the better I feel......to be cont.

I feel this. I’m pretty 50/50. Im eager to get to the bottom of this. To get confirmation. However there are days When I’m like “ wait no i dont want that to be written in stone on my record”.... i know I’m “different “ . But there’s something bittersweet about getting that diagnosis when you finally do find someone willing to hear you out:/... ( imo)

[Hulalady1992]

I didn't realize I was Autistic until I was 13. It explained why I did certain things like hide in corners, being scared of certain things even if it was mostly harmless and why I was placed in special ed classes from pre K to 7th grade. Middle school was horrible. My early high school years were bad too. Sometimes I wish I went to a special school so I wouldn't have been teased for being in special ed classes or for being awkward. But, my mom was stubborn and wanted me to be "normal."

[Ceara1010]

Both me and my sister think our family is teeming with people on the scale. An uncle is most certainly autistic and our father beeps, so did their father. I've taken the autism quiz at PsychCentral and so has my sister and we rank "possibly." If we are, it will explain a lot of things we both have struggled with throughout our lives. I'm sure my sister is on the scale, not so sure about me. Anyway, I think people on the scale can be pretty cool.

[RoxanneToto]

I have an ‘official’ diagnosis, from when I was 17. Some things fit, or used to, but I’ve always kind of questioned it, so I’m thinking of getting a new and more specialised assessment from either a trauma or autism expert (someone who knows about both would be even better, but I’m not sure I’d be able to find such an expert... I want to go that direction because some PTSD symptoms overlap with autism symptoms and I’d have a better chance at getting a more accurate result, I think).
I’d accept it if it still came back as me being on the spectrum, though. Every self test I’ve taken indicates at least a moderate possibility (including the one I took with my counsellor who was starting to query it. It was her suggestion lol!)