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Grand Magnate
Member Since Nov 2014
Location: Spain ( the land of flowers and gladness, lol!)
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Nov 14, 2014 at 10:39 AM
#1
Have you ever followed this kind of therapy?
I did it and it was a great help for me. I avoid even looking at people in their eyes. I felt so little thing. I remember my first step was greeting dogs in the parks and streets. You have to begin by the less difficult step. Then, I had to stablish a conversation with the dogs' owners and so on. From the easiest to the most difficult task. I had to sit at a coffee shop and eat something in public and such. Have you got any experience to tell? |
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Legendary Wise Elder
Community Liaison
Member Since Jun 2011
Location: somewhere, out there
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Nov 14, 2014 at 12:01 PM
#2
my pdoc made me try exposure therapy. I went along with it. it caused me to have nightmares.
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Nov 2014
Location: Spain ( the land of flowers and gladness, lol!)
Posts: 3,825
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Nov 14, 2014 at 02:54 PM
#3
Quote:
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Grand Magnate
Member Since May 2013
Location: Gallifrey
Posts: 4,166
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Nov 14, 2014 at 05:37 PM
#4
I did that with myself. Decided when I was 16 that I WAS going to change my behaviour to fit in better (and decided that I wasn't going to let depression or my family win...).
So by now (omg it's been about half my life) I've met a lot of challenges... that have taken a looot of small steps to reach. Eating out on my own was really tough. Started with food courts, then fast food places, then take out, then a restaurant that's fairly busy/quick, and now I can eat at almost any restaurant on my own. Still need to have a book or my phone out though. Also once or twice have managed to go into a pub and get a drink at the bar by myself - once I even talked to the bartender!! (Startled myself on that one! They started the conversation but still!) A big one for me was going to the movie theatre on my own. Holy moly was that hard! And making a hair appointment. And going to the doctors. And travelling. And using a taxi. hahaha. So many things that shouldn't be a challenge but totally are. __________________ "The time has come, the Walrus said, to talk of many things. Of shoes, of ships, of sealing wax, of cabbages, of kings! Of why the sea is boiling hot, of whether pigs have wings..." "I have a problem with low self-esteem. Which is really ridiculous when you consider how amazing I am. |
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Nov 2014
Location: Spain ( the land of flowers and gladness, lol!)
Posts: 3,825
9 1,758 hugs
given
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Nov 14, 2014 at 06:09 PM
#5
Yes, they are challenges for an avoidant.
You were really strong to make this decission at 16. I did just the oppossite. I decided to be alone in my room since I was 17. |
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Grand Magnate
Member Since May 2013
Location: Gallifrey
Posts: 4,166
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Nov 14, 2014 at 08:44 PM
#6
well, I'd OD'd when I was 15. My family's response was.... less than supportive. And I hadn't wanted to get busted about it, so I needed to sort out how to fake it just to survive daily again.
And then eventually realized that well, f*** them. I can't please them, and it was literally killing me. So I decided it was do or die, so I went to war with my brain and decided that I would prove my family completely wrong. I had to stop trying to meet their expectations because it would never happen. __________________ "The time has come, the Walrus said, to talk of many things. Of shoes, of ships, of sealing wax, of cabbages, of kings! Of why the sea is boiling hot, of whether pigs have wings..." "I have a problem with low self-esteem. Which is really ridiculous when you consider how amazing I am. |
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Member
Member Since Nov 2011
Location: 1000 miles from nowhere.
Posts: 311
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Nov 15, 2014 at 08:08 AM
#7
I have taken on Facebook as my social exposure, although I am very selective to what I post... plus the saving grace is the delete function should i need to use it.
Another Avie friendly technique i enlist is to limit the amount of friends to only a handful. __________________ Diagnosed: AvPD. It’s never alright. It comes and it goes. It’s always around, even when it don’t show. They say it gets better. well I guess that it might. But even when it’s better, it’s never alright. |
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Grand Magnate
Member Since May 2013
Location: Gallifrey
Posts: 4,166
10 882 hugs
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Nov 15, 2014 at 10:39 AM
#8
That's a great personal challenge Snap!
 (I do the same with numbers. I try to keep it around 100, and every year or so I go and purge the list. Currently at 98!)
__________________ "The time has come, the Walrus said, to talk of many things. Of shoes, of ships, of sealing wax, of cabbages, of kings! Of why the sea is boiling hot, of whether pigs have wings..." "I have a problem with low self-esteem. Which is really ridiculous when you consider how amazing I am. |
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Nov 2014
Location: Spain ( the land of flowers and gladness, lol!)
Posts: 3,825
9 1,758 hugs
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Nov 15, 2014 at 12:07 PM
#9
I'm very reluctant to be in social pages such as Facebook or Twiter. I'm afraid of someone breaking up my intimicy. I have a few on-line friends, all of them are avoidants like me, so we avoid ourselves each other. Lol!
But, good for you. I guess is a good step for you since it's a hard step for all of us.
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Member
Member Since Nov 2011
Location: 1000 miles from nowhere.
Posts: 311
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Nov 15, 2014 at 12:22 PM
#10
98!! wow!! my head would explode Red lol.
4 is my number and that even fluctuates.
__________________ Diagnosed: AvPD. It’s never alright. It comes and it goes. It’s always around, even when it don’t show. They say it gets better. well I guess that it might. But even when it’s better, it’s never alright. |
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Grand Magnate
Member Since May 2013
Location: Gallifrey
Posts: 4,166
10 882 hugs
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Nov 15, 2014 at 03:55 PM
#11
I've moved around a lot, so have had a lot of people from different places. It's pretty much the only way I keep up with them - seeing what each other is up to. And then family - which is a pretty big chunk. Would delete them... but... repercussions for that! Also have colleagues and aquaintances in my current city that I couldn't decline the friendship for... nor delete.. without risking offending them!
__________________ "The time has come, the Walrus said, to talk of many things. Of shoes, of ships, of sealing wax, of cabbages, of kings! Of why the sea is boiling hot, of whether pigs have wings..." "I have a problem with low self-esteem. Which is really ridiculous when you consider how amazing I am. |
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