Have you been diagnosed?

Yeah, recurrent depression too. Someone told me that if a professional hears the diagnosis is recurrent derpession, they already presume some kind of personality disorder. I dont know if that is true. In my case it is.

At this very moment, I don't know if I fit in a whole personality disorder.
I know I always found hard to be with people bc of my feeling of inadequency (I always felt the outsider). You never will see me in a group of people unless I have no way out, in that case, I try to do the very best to be unnoticed. That is: avoidance.

If I look at the past I always could live bc I have someone beside me. Someone I layed on. And I try to look for excuses for my behaviours and others' ones. Dependency.

I can ideolized people in my life and being terrible disappointed by them. You know, noone can fix to an idea. Borderline.

So, much to work on here. But, it doesn't matter. I already lived with it for many years and I'm not gonna put my hands down now.

I know we're covering old ground here, but I believe a majority of us have a few symptoms of multiple PD's, probably very few of us fit perfectly in 1 single PD. A lot of these mental "illnesses" overlap their symptoms. It's guesswork for even the most experienced professionals. Like you said, we have to keep on keeping on.

I have..
(agrees with the above re guesswork )

Hey Azul,

Good question!

I recently received an Avoidant PD diagnosis in combination with Borderline and Dependent, and I absolutely did NOT trust the psychologist or anyone for that matter. Essentially I was forced to do a psychological assessment in order to determine my psych profile. (Long story) Keep in mind - this is after I was abandoned by my DBT therapist - whom I DID trust... I thought the psychological assessments would brand me with something terrible - but after getting it - it makes perfect sense.

I don't know a whole lot about Avoidant PD - but I do know it would make perfect sense that someone with Avoidant PD would be much less willing to open up. I would be interested to see some statistics about Avoidant PD sufferers willingness to seek help compared to other illnesses.

I know that for myself - therapy was very hard and even a joke. My parents tried to force me to go to a therapist when I was a teenager but I didn't open up because my parents saw the same therapist! As if I would open up. Especially since most of my issues pertained to them. The irony is - after being tossed around for several years and being misdiagnosed - I ended up seeing a therapist whom I really bonded with and I suddenly saw the merit to therapy for the first time. This when my borderline traits really came out.

Right now - after being abandoned for the third time - I am VERY hard pressed never to trust another therapist ever again. But I know that my need to attach is going to override any lack of trust that I have...

thanks,
HD

Don't let past bad experiences stop you trying your recovery.
I don't remember well but in which sense did the terapist abandom you?
If you don't mind I ask you.