Therapy, and how to change

I don't think you can ever have it "under control." What's there to control? The urge to stay away from people? If anything, a "cure" would probably look like someone who had less self control, who kept themselves less contained. You can't control your avoidance anyway. Even if you ignore the urges and go out into the world interacting with people, the thoughts and impulses would still be there inside your head, and there's no way to stop or adjust them, not really. They always come back.

I don't like the idea that my personality is a flaw or a handicap. One has a handicap, one is not a handicap. When it comes down to it, a person is their personality. Maybe my personality has some odd quirks by other people's standards, but my entire self is not flawed because I think differently, or because I approach the world differently.

I also don't think that the only solution is just to learn to live with it. That's a very dark and hopeless scenario. Although it can't be cured, one can't recover from it, or however you want to state it, one can learn to manage it better. First by learning about it, then by paying attention to what your limits are and figuring out how to stay within them in a way that gives you the most of what you want from life. Everyone's life is a jigsaw puzzle. No one gets exactly what they want, it's all compromise after all.

The point of therapy is to figure out what is most important to you and then figure out a way to get it. It could very well be that "connecting with others" is too big a concept to start with. Perhaps "I'd like to create a relationship with this one person I know of whom I admire" or "I'd like to figure out what type of person I should look for to have a relationship with" might be a more manageable starting point.