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Member
Member Since May 2010
Location: Sacramento, California, USA
Posts: 58
14 2 hugs
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#1
I was diagnosed with APD a year or two ago and depression for many moons now. I have not had a face to face friend for over a decade. When I think about it, it bums me out. I don't know what to say to new people.
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Anonymous45521, Fuzzybear, Goforward, stahrgeyzer, zapatoes
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#2
I have lots of acquaintances but no friends. I think about 50% of people these days don't have ONE solid friend. I don't. Not one.
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zapatoes
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Magnate
Member Since Jul 2014
Location: VA
Posts: 2,053
10 799 hugs
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#3
A good friend is hard to come by... especially with people in our situation. I know I’m not the most outgoing of people. I was very lucky I met my wife, she is my best friend! Good luck in your search!
__________________ “Then what is your advice to new practitioners”? “The same as for old practitioners! Keep at it “. Ajahn Chah Bipolar 1 PTSD Social Anxiety Disorder Panic Attacks Parkinsonism Dissociative Amnesia Abilify 15mg Viiibryd 40mg Clonzapam.05mg x2 Depakote 1500mg Gabapentin 300mg x 3 Wellbutrin 300mg Carbidopa/Levodopa 25mg-100mg x 3 |
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zapatoes
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Member
Member Since Nov 2017
Location: Michigan
Posts: 106
6 115 hugs
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#4
[COLOR="Ma i am the same way and i am really thinking i have this disorder even though i am not diagnosed. I have no friends because i think everyone is better than me and i dont know how to talk to pepole, so i stay home by myself. This has grown worse in the last few years i have been like this. I get lonely but i cant bring myself to go out anywheres because i have a fear of trying to talk to people i dont even know what i would say and then i would make a fool of myself trying to talk to people when i dont even know how
__________________ Stephanie ------------------------------------------------------------- Borderline personality disorder, Agoraphobia, Social phobia, Depression, Anxiety, Pre-menopause, Sleep apnea, Fibromyalgia, AVPD Meds- Cymbalta, Latuda, Aderall, Nuvigil ------------------------------------------------------------ |
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zapatoes
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Member
Member Since Dec 2017
Location: Canada
Posts: 167
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#5
Do you have any interests like hiking, skiing, ice skating, or foreign languages? In my area we have a variety of related meetup groups, and some such meetings are quite suitable for people with social anxiety. In hiking you don't need to talk much and you may walk off anxiety at the same time. Some meetups are just walks in local parks or gardens without any too lively conversations.
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zapatoes
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Wisest Elder Ever
Member Since Nov 2002
Location: Cave.
Posts: 96,458
(SuperPoster!)
21 81.4k hugs
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#6
(((((((( hugs ))))))))
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Hobbit House, zapatoes
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Magnate
Member Since Feb 2018
Location: literally hell
Posts: 2,357
6 5,660 hugs
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#7
I wanted to tell you that the intense pain of loneliness eventually fades. At least for me. Unfortunately I haven't had a friend in real life here in like 18 years. I had a few online friends during my intense spiritual peak years. After losing spirituality I lost all of those friends which led to serious depression and suicidal thoughts on a daily basis, which lasted for like 7 or so years but the good news is that the pain and loneliness eventually fades.
I hope you find friends that you feel comfortable with. If not then it's not the end of the world. You can learn to be friends with the best person in the world for you, yourself. |
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zapatoes
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Louise54
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Junior Member
Member Since Apr 2017
Location: Tortuga
Posts: 11
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#8
Really relatable. I have an avoidant personality disorder aswell and I can feel really lonely. I have a hard time with social contact and opening up, so I don't have a social network... It isn't easy.
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Fuzzybear, zapatoes
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Wisest Elder Ever
Member Since Nov 2002
Location: Cave.
Posts: 96,458
(SuperPoster!)
21 81.4k hugs
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#9
I can see why I may appear not to have this since I am quite ''social'' online, went to university etc... anyway. I wish everyone well. Maybe I have proved that labelling t (therapist) wrong
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zapatoes
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Sep 2018
Location: Islandia
Posts: 4,263
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#10
Yes @PsychoPhil I like meetups and you can attend with a large group or not so large, but if it’s 6 or more people it’s not so bad as can be the quiet person and visit with a few people or listen more.
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Account Suspended
Member Since Feb 2021
Location: Southern California
Posts: 37
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#11
I've never had a friend my entire life. People have always been hostile to me, and I don't know why. I spent most of my life being nice to people only to have that niceness ruthlessly taken advantage of. I've lost most of my interests precisely because other people got interested in the same thing and crowded me out.
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Louise54, zapatoes
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Grand Member
Member Since Jan 2015
Location: USA
Posts: 771
9 111 hugs
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#12
Me too. I'm so bored, I wish I had people to hang out with but it's hard to open up and bring my personality out.
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zapatoes
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New Member
Member Since Jun 2021
Location: los angeles
Posts: 1
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#13
now i know what i have. it ruined me ... AVPD. it is devastating when all my life, i knew my behavior was off. i told the therapists and psychiatrists. it is too late. life passed me by. friends left me not understanding my behavior and i had no clue either....and i did not participate in life in any way except for working it away and ending up with nothing in the end. sorry, i know this is depressing, but it is the truth. i do not want to die alone and am living in so much fear...and yet frozen....and not willing to take a chance to put myself out there because i have lived my entire life like this. but, now i am not working, and can't hide behind workaholism any longer. i am exposed and feeling extremely disconnected from earth.
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dzrtgirl, Louise54, zapatoes
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