Research is starting to understand AvPD

Avoidant PD quote from WikiPedia, including peer reviewed reference:
The underlined parts is 100% match for me. I score 100% on all Avoidant PD tests. I see a lot of personality disorders that caused by people who abnormally high amounts of good qualities such as empathy or intelligence being traumatized by coming to this world and interacting with "humans." That's why I love the animals and all of nature so much, and avoid earth humans like the plague. Is there anyone here who feels the same?

This sounds like me too. I realized in therapy recently, that I's be raised in essentially a loveless household. I never saw my parents exchange so much as a single moment of affection for each other, no kissing, no hugging or carressing. I thought this was normal and I feel now that I've been trying to invent love from a place of parched earth where nothing would grow. I am a loving, sensitive, passionate and yes, loving individual but I don't allow my emotions to bubble to the surface, keep them tamped down. It's cost me one relationship after another. Now I know what it is, can name it, I'm determined to fix it. I too, love animals and prefer their company to people. I'd like to change that too.

Studies have shown that a distinguishable group of aspies have significantly higher IQs. In a 100 years a lot of disorders will probably have sub-groups to distinguish bright souls who have disorders because humanity is like poison to them. The father of physics, Isaac Newton, is believed to have Asperger syndrome. He's the genius of geniuses.

Borderline personality disorder surely seems like another one where bright souls are traumatized by being forced to closely interact with earth humans.

I relate to the parts underlined too..
I didn't see my parents exchange a single moment of affection for each other either...
it was like a parched earth ..

It's good that research is FINALLY starting to understand this disorder

I too am a loving, sensitive soul

Get professionally diagnosed first then do the research working your information back and forth with your psych.
Forget all the BS in-between or you're going to struggle or waste time on something you don't have.

Research what you have been professionally diagnosed with.
Because what if someone like me asked you "what is AvPD?.... you should be able to answer it right if your diagnosing yourself with it!
Plus what's the difference between the symptoms of Depression and AvPD because Depression will make you withdraw and avoid....but that's not AvPD.
Can you see what I'm getting at?
Don't use the AvPD forum as research either because most of what's written comes way of those who don't have the disorder, but by those who only connection to AvPD is the word "Avoiding.

I'm sure other sections within this forum is brilliant but in-regards to research using the AvPD forum is not a true example of AvPD.
Sorry- just being honest.

I agree a diagnosis is important, so you know what's what.. and what isn't
I thought I had bipolar for about a year, and stressed out over it a ton.. turns out I didn't, so getting a diagnosis will help you avoid 'barking up the wrong tree' i presume is what you mean Snap66.

I've been diagnosed, there is precious little information on this illness.
Things like this small thread are incredibly valuable for someone such as myself. Partly as 'all the information' out there is rehashed. The same thing said over and over again - just copy pasted and paraphrased a bit.
Anectdotal information is what I'm looking for as research isn't particularly forthcoming and all the while I'm suffering in silence.
This does lead to the problem of anectdotal reports being anecdotal.
But without them, you can read wikipedia or a paraphrasing of wikipedia...
I want to know how real people are effected by this, in their own words... so I can try and relate and understand what they're going through,,,, so that I may come to realisations about myself and how this disorder came to be and how it influences my life.

I can totally relate to never experiencing intimacy on any level in my family.
My parents were together for 19 years of my life and I've never once seen my parents kiss or even hug.
I too thought this was normal. The normal. I figured everyone was so guarded and ashamed of love, or scorned it.... I think I may have come to think of needing love as a shameful self-indulgence as a result..

I've strived for love,,, and missed every time. I don't even really know what it is... I never received it.. not in a manner that was 'digestible' never witnessed it being given between members of my family.
Yet I really care about other people, so much - I want to be there with them and for them. I think I could love others much more than myself.
Somehow through my childhood experience I learnt I was un-loveable..
I went through CEN like more than 50% of people with AVPD have done.

It makes sense - the above; that being attuned to the needs of others and having high levels of empathy - in an environment were those things were deemed worthless or just not even on the radar of importance..
Would leave you feeling like your love and care and desire to connect with others; was a flaw, or that you were so flawed that regardless of your desire to connect - you were not desirable, and so your desires to connect were just fantasy and no one else shared your fantasy.
If that's who you were and it was totally shunned.... .then naturally you would internalise this as a failing on your part.
As when we are young we don't have the capacity to blame our parents.... we don't even have the 'theory of mind' until we're 8 years old.

So personally I completely agree with this. It makes sense and feels very familiar. I feel like my interpersonal 'social tendrils' / desire to connect have been burnt, scarred.....
I felt so rejected in all my attempts to connect with another, that I decided it was my fault..... that I was truly un-loveable or undesirable. And so I avoid all interpersonal contact on anything but the superficial as I'm sure I'll be rejected.
I can trace this directly to my un-loving family home.
It just makes sense. And it's ****... I hate that my life is like this.

Aye.
It's important to know which tree to bark at!

I learnt I was ''not loveable'' through my childhood experience, and then a therapist with Narcissistic Personality Disorder ''taught'' me again how ''unloveable, undeserving, unendearing''…. etc.. I was. At least I spotted them all as Narcissists, eventually

I too have looked up this disorder, which the therapist dxd me with, online, and have only found copy pasted copies. Not helpful..

''guarded and ashamed of love... scorning it'' - a good description of PUs (my parental units)

I've been wondering about this myself, too. I haven't been officially diagnosed with either AvPD or SPS, but I seem to fit the bill in both respects. I have been diagnosed with Complex PTSD. My abuse was intense, with no non-abusive behavior to act as a contrast. Everyone's hatred of me feels like a firehose in my face, all the time. They say we're "too sensitive" when in reality they're insensitive.

Yes when I was a kid I had to wear a back brace from the time I was 7 to 17. 24 hours a day. In fact they don't have people wear this type of brace anymore because of the trauma.

I have blocked a lot of it out, but, I was a target everyplace I went. For mean people... for quietly mean people... and even my family.

Now I am avoidant and that keeps me away from people and even that... it another reason for people to be jerks.

It makes complete sense that you are avoidant after a lot of abuse.