[leah0306]

I am totally completely losing it. am on meds. but i have for like 3 weeks doing something that i was once able to deal with and is now nearly making me crazy. I see or hear words, and go over the letter in the words over and over..like trying to make the sentence or whatever divide by five...so say "the bear" well in my head im taking the 7 letters and rearanging the over and over to the point that i think i cant take it anymore. Im driving myself crazy,and i understand logically that its a total waste of energy but am not able to stop... wondering if anyone else deals with this and if so what works for them, im desperate to stop these thoughts...would really appreciate anything that might help still these thoughts......

[perpetuallysad]

I do a lot of mental repetition of things too. Sometimes I will repeat the exact same thing for DAYS, I mean every moment my brain isn't occupied with a specific and consuming task I will repeat something. Lately I have been repeating this line from a Stephen King book "He thrusts his fists against the post and insists he sees a ghost." I mean I say that so many times a day to myself that its like a never ending record.

I am actually hoping typing this out will help me get past it. Sometimes if it is just one word, or a concrete idea I will try looking it up in a dictionary or a book or whatever. If I read what it is a few times, a lot of times it will let go of me. Of course, I just pick up something else.

My pdoc says these are part of my intrusive thoughts that come with ocd, but they are also a part of my racing mind and bipolar. I guess they are co-morbid?

Wow, I suppose nothing I've said is useful. Maybe you could try writing out whatever's stuck in your head?

[Anneinside]

They are obsessive thoughts. I know when I am under stress I start counting my steps and sometimes just counting. My therapist and I worked out that when I start counting I try to think of a list of things like vegetables - lettuce, radishes, cucumbers.... and the counting stops for awhile. It breaks up the repetitive thoughts as you don't repeat and you really have to think to come up with more for the list.

[BNLsMOM]

I do it all the time with digits. I will add up all the digits of a number that I see, a phone number, house number, whatever... and then add the digits that the answer comes to until I am down to a one digit number. Then I decide if I like the number or not. If I like it, I am satisfied with the effort. If not, I just mentally throw it away. I never thought it was obsessive, just something to occupy my mind. I guess if it is not bothersome, then it isn't a problem. If it bothers you, it is maybe something to talk to your T or p-doc about.

BTW, I hated math when I was in school.

[upperbaboonistan]

I used to translate for the hearing impaired, so I stealthily spell out in sign language letters with one hand one word over and over and over. Not where anyone can notice, but I will literally do it until my hand cramps. Sometimes the word I am signing creeps into my conversation. For example, if it is "reality", then I will say something like "Hey when you go to the store, will you pick up a jar of reality?" when what I really mean is pickles. Sometimes this can be embarrassing if the word I'm signing is a person's name or a word like M*****F.

Like Anneinside says, I had to work through it by signing something terminal, like a list of items (not numbers). I don't know why, but that sometimes works for me. Like instead of signing numbers nonstop all the way to infinity, I sign Robert Frost's "Stopping By The Woods On A Snowy Evening." Sometimes I get hung up on the last word, but usually i can find something else to occupy my mind by then. I'm a writer, so having an outlet that allows cohesive thoughts to flow from my brain through my fingers really works, too. If I get locked on, I can work on my book, and eventually I move past it without even realizing it. I hate to even ask this, but have you and your doctor ever talked about Aspergers?

[leah0306]

hi, no i havent mentioned it to my pdr. kinda dreading the reaction!! thanks for the support take care

[leah0306]

i never did well in math either!! so its weird, and next time i see pdr. i think i need to mention this. just dread what hell say..... take care