[Dr7119]

So I haven't gotten help yet, but the wife and I have finally convinced me that I need it. Was anyone else terrified about being "zombified"? I almost want to keep the mania (I get so much done) but I could do without the intermittent episodes of worthlessness and wanting to cry all the time. Am I alone in this part?

[grizmom]

Originally Posted by Dr7119

So I haven't gotten help yet, but the wife and I have finally convinced me that I need it. Was anyone else terrified about being "zombified"? I almost want to keep the mania (I get so much done) but I could do without the intermittent episodes of worthlessness and wanting to cry all the time. Am I alone in this part?

For me, my episodes are generally on the depressed or mixed side with rare hypomania so before the dx I already felt like a zombie most of the time; sometimes a very irritable zombie! It took a long time, but I finally have meds that are working fairly well and I'm grateful for that.

It would probably be a good idea to get evaluated and at least try some medication options; remember that you can always go back to no medications if that is what you prefer. I wish you the best!

I never really feared feeling like a zombie because of meds. I already felt that way because of depression. As far as the meds go, if they are well-chosen they will stabilize your moods. Yes, you may miss your mania's, but the stability you can gain will make life better. Get evaluated. Keep in touch as you go through this journey.

[Maxime]

I don't regret starting meds 13 years ago. Even it has been hard to find meds that work I think it's worth it. I probably would have killed myself by now. If you find the right you won't feel like a zombie but just more balanced and in control.

Good luck with whatever you choose to do.

[sugahorse1]

I agree that with right combo you shouldn't feel too much like a zombie.
I'm feeling like one, but it's probably a mixed episode and probably a sign i need to see my pdoc to make some changes

[RRU96]

Originally Posted by Dr7119

So I haven't gotten help yet, but the wife and I have finally convinced me that I need it.

That is a Great Decision. I am currently going through some difficult times and without my choice to get back on medications and to seek help again, I would probably be living somewhere else besides with my wife.

Originally Posted by Dr7119

Was anyone else terrified about being "zombified"?

Certain Medications may give you those "Zombified" experiences. This just means you may need to try other medications. I had those Zombie feelings on Symbiax. Quickly got it changed. Many medications are out there and with the right combination, you will not have to worry about those side effects.

Originally Posted by Dr7119

I almost want to keep the mania (I get so much done) but I could do without the intermittent episodes of worthlessness and wanting to cry all the time. Am I alone in this part?

Yes, the productivity in those manic/hypomanic moments can get many things accomplished. But what happens when they are gone? What happens when those manic/hypomanic moments turn into Irritability and you do things or say things that later regret. This is something I have recently faced.

Stick with it! You've already taken the hardest steps.