[maryjain lockhart]

Hi, I'm 29, and diagnosed BPD@17. I never took anything for it long term cuz I don't like how it makes me feel like I have no feelings. They gave me prozac but that wasn't good. Gave me Cymbalta but it made me sick all the time. But now I'm getting more&more outta control with my feelings. Also starting2get off methadone4heroin addiction&that's creating anxiety. I also have panic attacks once or twice a wk&I take ativan but only 0.5mg&it doesn't do anything unless I take4or5pills. Anyway, I'm all over tha place emotionally&I wonder what should I do? MD gave me a psych referral&I'm waiting4an apptmt but its gonna be another4wks b4I see anybody....HELP!! What can I do before then2cope?

[Moreta]

If you feel that you can't make it the 4 weeks, and that you need medical attention now, go the the ER and they can help you.

Or see if you can see your regular MD and ask them what you should do.

[Skully]

Take a deep breath and try to relax. Are you bipolar I or bipolar II? Different medications are used to treat the two. If you are bipolar II then a anti depressant wasn't such a good idea. Try to hang on until your appointment but if you can't, do what Queen said and go to the ER. They should be able to help you out there.

[Shakti]

See if your area has a mental health emergency services organization of some sort. If it gets bad enough, go to the ER. I recently did this out of desperation (for suicidal depression) and it was the best thing I've done for myself in a while. They set me up with an NP at emergency services and they referred me to a pdoc. In the meantime they set me up on meds and gave me samples until I got insurance. I realize for some people this is a huge deal due to the bills that result. I'm in MA (we have universal health care) and an unemployed, so I have free insurance, but while I waited for my insurance to come through I was put in a program called "health safety net." This covered the bill for me. A huge relief! My point is that no matter where you are they likely have options available for financial difficulties. Even if I had not qualified for health safety net, I could have applied for a financial hardship waiver. Or, if I was employed, a payment plan. Just an idea. Probably much more feasible in some areas than others. Of course this is all assuming you are in the US.

I noticed you said you were on Prozac and Cymbalta but not a mood stabilizer? People with bipolar should not take antidepressants alone because they can induce mania (at best) and/or cause severe depression or even mixed states. Were you just treating the depression? I was completely out of control until I started a mood stabilizer as well. For four years I took only antidepressants and it was HELL. But a mood stabilizer and an antidepressant together? Perfect. Well, as perfect as it's going to get. And it could always change. My point is--you should check with a pdoc or any other doc who is comfortable treating bipolar and see what he/she thinks about this.

For what it's worth, SSRIs like prozac are like poison in my body. A lot of people have this reaction to it. I tried Cymbalta and it may as well have been tic tacs--did nothing. We are all different and our body chemistries all differ, but bipolar people have distinct reactions to anti-depressants. It sounds like you definitely should to get in to see a pdoc asap.

Oh and for me, ativan is like taking nothing. My doc prescribed it once and I flushed it down the toilet. The ONLY anti-anxiety meds that have worked for me have been valium (which seems to be one they don't like to dole out) and klonopin (old faithful).

Body chemistries definitely differ but keep at it and eventually it will get better. In the meantime hang around here for support.

[maryjain lockhart]

I took a "test"@my pdocs&he said it indicated that I'm probably bipolarII and I have been reading up on prozac cuz I also take methadone&discovered that the2aren't exactly good together. And the clinic NP gave me the cymbalta cuz I have pain a lot&I don't think that was good. Both made me end up going out&buying benzos&other pills&getting all messed up&doing things I hadn't done since I was young&dumb&totally outta control. It was scary&I ended up throwing my pills away.
Ativan helps me when I have panic attacks but I need like2mg for it to work, but it also helps with irritability. I work with idiots&I swear id love2just go off on them everyday but I'm their superior&it'd look bad.
U guys are so nice2write back&offer advice. Thanks so much, I appreciate it! I had2work all day so I couldn't get on earlier. I'm about2go4a walk2calm down&then get ready4bed.
((((((((((Hugs))))))))))

[Maxime]

If you have bipolar an antidepressant could make it worse. Maybe you need to be just on a mood stabiliser. Some people combine mood stabilisers and anti depressants and that works well.

If you feel like you are unsafe please take yourself to the ER.

Hang in there.

[Skully]

Originally Posted by maryjain lockhart

I took a "test"@my pdocs&he said it indicated that I'm probably bipolarII and I have been reading up on prozac cuz I also take methadone&discovered that the2aren't exactly good together. And the clinic NP gave me the cymbalta

Oh no, very bad for bipolar II! No wonder you are in the shape you are in. You need a mood stabilizer like Lamictal, Geodon, Abilify, lithium, Depakote, and the list goes on. Any good pdoc knows better than to give a bipolar patient an anti depressant!!!

[Eloise42]

I'm not at all surprised those pills didn't help you. Opiates are highly addictive but it's really possible that you were self-medicating for a reason: because you needed medication. Addiction and BPD can co-exist but I've also known people with bipolar who found it a lot easier to not do hard drugs once they were getting the right treatment for bipolar.

I think Ativan is a benzodiazapene like Zanax and Valium etc., which a lot of us take for anxiety but it isn't a mood stabilizer. Walking and exercise are good, creative outlets are good, I think you need a doctor who understands how to treat bipolar.

[sugahorse1]

In response to Skully and Maxime: I take the equivalent of I think Depakote (Sodium Valporate) and either it's not working, or the fact that I take an anti-depressant is making this a useless combo.
Please help with some advice (And I know you aren't pdocs!) I go thro major depression, anxiety every now and again, and only very rarely hypomania. Often my brain races and I cannot function 100% due to that either

[Shakti]

"Any good pdoc knows better than to give a bipolar patient an anti depressant!!!"

I would say that any good pdoc knows not to give a bipolar patient an anti-depressant alone in almost all cases. But most of us do take an anti-depressant. They are not a total no-no at all. Skully, I know you knew this, but I wanted to clarify the statement for the original poster.

Without an anti-depressant added to my mood stabilizer I'm an absolute MESS...completely nonfunctional.

[sugahorse1]

Thanks for clearing that Shakti! I first dx'd with Major depressive episode, which was helped by anti-depressants and some anti-anxiety meds. After some fluctuating moods, and the depression not lifting, the pdoc had to relook at my dx.

I think it may often be the case that the first issue dx'd is depression, which only later is changed to bipolar (Assuming the symptoms are present) so those patients have initially been treated solely with anti-depressants

[maryjain lockhart]

The psychiatrist says I'm bipolarI&I'm starting 100mgs of lamictal next week after starting out @25 and working upto 100,perhaps even going up2 200@some point manias goin away but still having depression.