[FitPrk3]

Well i talked to my ex just now and now I'm pissed off. Why? Why do I let her get under my skin like this? All weekend I didn't talk to her and I was fine. Didn't have any episodes, any mood swings or anything...but as SOON as i talk to her, my blood almost starts to boil. My heart starts pounding like its going to explode...the hair on my neck stands up, and I just get filled with adrenaline cause I don't like talking to her anymore with her attitude towards me...

She is trying to keep pushing back her coming to get the rest of her stuff from the apartment so she like has a reason to check up on me...Im not checking up on her so why would she do this to me? I don't understand her anymore. She watches my every move and screams and yells if I do anything wrong, but yet, we are not together anymore and are soon going to filling for a dissolution. If we can agree on anything anymore...

UGH!!!!!!!!! I just want to go explode...Im tired of dealing with her. I know I made mistakes and I owned up to every one of them and decided I needed help so that it doesn't ever happen again to anyone. I took the reponsibility of my actions. I've apologized and nothing works. She is still a complete ****** to me. I don't get it anymore. She's coming over at 3p today so hopefully I just won't talk to her. Silence is best between us now...

I don't know what to think when it comes to this situation anymore. I just want it over and done with so I can move on with my life. I want this all to be finished. I NEED MY TIME ALONE so I can get my life back on track. And seeing her like every other day is not/does not help(ing)

Patience I guess is the key here...hopefully she can find some and act like a normal human being when she gets here...

[blueoctober]

FitPrk3; have you tried to set boundaries with her? If she wants to pick up her stuff have your family or a friend present and you can leave the house, so you don't need to see each other. Perhaps suggest any communication between you is done over e-mail.

[FitPrk3]

Originally Posted by blueoctober

FitPrk3; have you tried to set boundaries with her? If she wants to pick up her stuff have your family or a friend present and you can leave the house, so you don't need to see each other. Perhaps suggest any communication between you is done over e-mail.

I would try the family member thing, except, my mom doesn't like her. My dad is gone today. Her mom lives like 50 miles away, and her dad is probably with his girlfriend. The only people that could be present are the married couple that she moved in with. And I told her that they are not allowed anywhere near this apartment...They hate me and i don't like them so...

But im telling her today, (cause its supposed to rain so she can't move everything like I want her too) that she has to have it all out by wednesday. (she has class tomorrow) Im not putting up with this anymore. Im putting my foot down. She wanted this and now she is procrastinating...so whatever. Like I said, I'm just gonna tell her when she gets her not to talk to me, unless its about a box she wants me to grab...

I don't know how this is gonna turn out but I can't avoid it like she is, I need to move on for me and if it takes having to see her 2 more times, then I guess thats what its gonna take...

~A

[PT52]

Hope it goes okay for you..one thing I am still learning is that it takes two to argue. If she's yelling at you, of course you're going to get angry, but take a deep breath and remind yourself that you have a choice to respond or not. Break the cycle - I believe that you're strong enough to do that.

[FitPrk3]

Originally Posted by PT52

Hope it goes okay for you..one thing I am still learning is that it takes two to argue. If she's yelling at you, of course you're going to get angry, but take a deep breath and remind yourself that you have a choice to respond or not. Break the cycle - I believe that you're strong enough to do that.

And i did. She came over and we were both civil with each other. No yelling no screaming no arguing. It went better than I expected it to. She almost has everything out. She just needs to pick up her dishes on friday...(MY BDAY!!) but anyways, this is difficult, but everyone keeps inspiring me not to get myself down, and I'm doing a good job I believe...
So thank you everyone for your support. This all will get better in time for me, and I will move on. I'm taking one day at a time. So we'll see where this twisting road leads me...hopefully to the light at the end of the tunnel...

~A

[PT52]

Many years ago, I had a boyfriend break up with me on my birthday...it really sucked. Luckily, a friend showed up with a pizza and a bottle of Crown..made it bearable, anyway. Do you have something planned for your birthday?

[FitPrk3]

Originally Posted by PT52

Many years ago, I had a boyfriend break up with me on my birthday...it really sucked. Luckily, a friend showed up with a pizza and a bottle of Crown..made it bearable, anyway. Do you have something planned for your birthday?

I wanted to have a party, but A) im broke until whenever I get paid, and I don't know when exactly that is... and B) like I said in previous posts, I really don't have any friends that would want to show up...so I want to but its doubtful....

Off to work...let you know if I talk to the owner of the new job offer today...

~A

[PT52]

I've had lots of birthdays that I spent by myself...heck, when I was a kid, my parents even forgot my birthday one year. Anyway, even on a Friday evening, you know there will be plenty of us here - we can have a virtual party!

[FitPrk3]

Originally Posted by PT52

I've had lots of birthdays that I spent by myself...heck, when I was a kid, my parents even forgot my birthday one year. Anyway, even on a Friday evening, you know there will be plenty of us here - we can have a virtual party!

Thanks PT, I will probably have to settle for a virtual party...cause as of now im broke. I don't get paid till next tuesday. And I've had a terrible day...so I don't know about anything right now...just extremely aggrivated....

~A