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#1
Oct 07, 2010, 03:24 PM
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So one of the main things that led to me being on medical leave for the past three weeks was that my Dad died in May. Right before my Dad died I ran out of Seroquel and I also missed an appointment with my old Pdoc and he canceled me as a patient because when I realized I had missed the appointment it was already passed the time to call and cancel. Long story short. My Dad dies and I have no meds for the past 4 months that really helped. I found another Pdoc and they put me on Abilify, Trazadone and Topomax. The Abilify made me very ill and I call the Dr back and said I can't take these and they told me to keep taking them I will get past it. I couldn't even stand up without throwing up so I stopped taking them. So since May all I have been taking is Topomax, Trazadone and I added Melatonin to help me sleep.
I started having huge issues at work, home and pretty much everywhere. I am doing a lot better now that I have a new Pdoc and I am back on Seroquel, but I am still very depressed and October 10th is my Dad's birthday. I am glad that the 10th is on the weekend and that I won't be alone all day. My Dad and I were very close, but I did not get to see him before he died or be at the funeral. He lived in the Dominican Republic (he moved there 2 years ago) and was buried there. We had a Memorial Service for him in D.C. where he used to live this summer, but it was not the same. |
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#2
Oct 07, 2010, 03:36 PM
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Hi LaraLynn, I'm so sorry about the loss of your Dad. Like many of us here, I've lost my Dad too, and I know how much it hurts. It must have been even more difficult to get through without your usual medication. I'm really glad you're back on the Seroquel again and that you're doing a lot better.
Are you in therapy? I'm also wondering about a Grief Group. Do you think something like that would be helpful? If you don't like the idea of a group, then I really hope you're able to explore the possibility of some one-on-one counseling. Wishing you all the very best and sending you hugs for this painful anniversary 
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#3
Oct 07, 2010, 06:55 PM
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LaraLynn; I'm sorry for your loss. I'm glad you have a new p-doc and I hope the depression lifts soon.
__________________
Favorite book on bipolar "Living with Someone who is Living with Bipolar Disorder" by Chelsea Lowe, 2010 Check out my blog The Bipolar Roller Coaster: http://blueoctober.psychcentral.net/ New Post March 23 "New Therapist" |
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#4
Oct 07, 2010, 10:07 PM
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 It sucks losing your dad...I guess it gets easier, I lost my dad 20 years ago. But I still miss him a lot...
__________________
"Better not look down, if you want to keep on flying Put the hammer down, keep it full speed ahead Better not look back, or you might just wind up crying You can keep it moving, if you don't look down" - B.B. King Come join the BP Social Society on Psych Central Everyone is Welcome! |
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#5
Oct 08, 2010, 02:51 AM
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(((((LaraLynn))))) Sorry you are feeling so bad.
My dad passed on in January, and I too miss him each day. I hope you have/get the help you so much need 
__________________
 DXD BP1, BPD & OCPD  "The best way to make it through with hearts and wrists in tact, is to realise, two out of three aint bad" FOB...
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#6
Oct 08, 2010, 10:42 AM
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LaraLynn. I'm sorry you're feeling so badly. Thinking of you and hoping you can make it through this as well as possible and that you can gets your meds working right. 
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#7
Oct 08, 2010, 10:54 AM
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LaraLynn--
I too am sorry to hear what you're going through right now. I lost my grandmother 10 years ago and thought I was over it. I'm back seeing a therapist now, realizing that I really wasn't. Talking to the therapist really helps me. Keeping seeing someone if you can. Hope you feel better soon. |
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#8
Oct 08, 2010, 01:33 PM
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((((((((((laraLynn))))))))) Sorry for your loss.
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#9
Oct 08, 2010, 09:56 PM
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Thank you all so much! No, I do not have a therapist right now. I found a BP support group that meets 2x a month near me, but have not joined yet. Been really wanting to, but nervous. I have 5 free therapy visit, but have to find a new therapists and well I hate using the phone and setting things up and I know I need to do it, but I haven't, but I have so much stuff in my head that I need out so I have been trying to force myself to find one that will take patients in the evening. I have 4 children and the youngest is 30 months and is with me all day right now while I am not working so evening would be the only time I could go.
I have planned my Dad's favorite meal on Sunday and we are going to watch the musical "The Man of La Mancha." My Dad was an Actor and that was his favorite musical he played Don Quixote. When ever I listen to the CD it sounds exactly like my Dad signing. When I went to his Memorial in D.C. it was at a Piano Bar and everyone got up and sang songs that my Dad sang or songs that reminded them of him. I sang "I Dreamed A Dream" from Les Miserables that was one of his favorites too. I miss him so much. |
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#10
Oct 08, 2010, 11:00 PM
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What you have planned for your Dad's Birthday sounds wonderful. So does the Memorial for him in D.C.
 I'm so very sorry for the pain of missing your Dad It's great you've found a local BP support group, and I hope you're able to get together with them soon and that you get a lot out of it. |
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