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#1
Feb 28, 2011, 02:45 PM
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Rant about ex and mom trouble...
So for the past few years my mother has been forcing my ex on me. She always says 'he has stood by your side through everything'. She invited him to my 'birthday dinner' this week which pissed me off. Then yesterday was my birthday and she had my son, who is 'best friends' with him, call him to go out to brunch and spend the day with us. I went to brunch, then my son spent the rest of the day watching cartoons with him, he stayed until I went to bed. Peeked his head in and said 'I love you.' Today I told my mom I was going out for dinner and she said 'call him and make sure he knows you won't be home.' I felt a rage inside of me I told her I only tolerate him because he is constantly forced into my life. Then she started throwing things telling me how stupid I am and how he is such a great guy and good with my son. To top things off he is my dads buddy too, he comes to the house almost every day. I have tried to cut ties with him many times, my parents say it is not fair to take a friend from their life. They say it is not fair to take my son from him (he is not the biological dad). I left my family for about a year because they chose him over me, but eventually I was broke & homeless and had to come back. We have been broken up for over 4 years. He always is trying to touch me and get with me any way he can. He keeps telling me that we are supposed to be together & gets my son to tell me that he wants me to marry him, and that he wants him for a dad. That infuriates me, I don't like this guy no mixed signals I tell him all the time I don't want to be with him, and that there is no future for us. My mom will eventually get what she wants, she already said 'I have so much in my past', meaning mental illness, that if I left again she would make sure he gets my son. How sick is that? I do not love him, I do not want to be with him, I do not want every day to be ruined by his presents, he makes me sick. |
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#2
Feb 28, 2011, 03:11 PM
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Ugh. I'm sorry. My mother is a trip, too. I can't believe yourom played the "taking a. Friend from us" card. You know you'll be miserable if you go back with your ex. And the terms of yoyr divorce should be between him and you abd the lawyer(s).
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#3
Feb 28, 2011, 03:22 PM
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Quote:
 Ha ha we were never even married! He is so manipulative he has them wrapped around his finger. 
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#4
Feb 28, 2011, 03:30 PM
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that bites :-( Sounds like "I would have words with a few people". ... If it was only that easy. Unfortantly untill you get away from the situation I don't see it coming to any end. Sounds like your talking to a wall, and thats a hard feeling. Wish you the best. ((hug))
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Always Keep Fighting 
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 Amura
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#5
Feb 28, 2011, 03:36 PM
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Amura, that sounds like a really lousy situation you are in and I really feel for you.
Have you ever had a family counseling session to try to get your entire family to join you with your therapist? If you talk to your therapist in advance and have them set ground rules for the meeting then they can help protect you and make sure that you can tell them your side in a neutral, and hopefully safe environment. If they love you then hopefully the therapist can help them understand what this situation is doing to you. I hope you can work something out with them soon. Peace, Mac
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 Many times I've been alone and many times I've cried anyway you'll never know the many ways I've tried DX: Ultra ultra rapid cycling bipolar 1 depression with frequent mixed episodes Meds: Lamictal 400mg Geodon 160mg Concerta 18mg Klonopin 1mg prior meds: Trileptal, Risperdal, Celexa, Lexapro, Zyprexa, Invega, Abilify, Lithium, Effexor, Ativan |
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#6
Mar 01, 2011, 08:57 PM
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Can you get a consult with a lawyer who specializes in custody cases? Maybe you could get a legal document that says somebody neutral (of your choice) will be guardian of your son if you're incapacitated. And this is probably really hard to do, but if you have no choice to be around him, be clear with him about boundaries, but as far as your parents go, just smile and nod even if they throw fits - no one can make you be with anyone, and you can avoid the arguments at the same time.
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"Better not look down, if you want to keep on flying Put the hammer down, keep it full speed ahead Better not look back, or you might just wind up crying You can keep it moving, if you don't look down" - B.B. King Come join the BP Social Society on Psych Central Everyone is Welcome! |
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#7
Mar 02, 2011, 03:36 PM
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I agree with PT52, a guardian would be best to set up now. It sounds like you have very controlling parents. I can see where they would want you to be with someone they consider stable, but total controlling behavior by a man who can't move on is not the way. You need to take care of your emotional self and make arrangements for your son if you need extra time to take care of yourself.
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Rainy BiPolar Survivor...
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