[cybermember]

I live in a house with three other people; two are 25 and a couple, myself 48, and the other 55 y.o. I lead a very structured life to keep stress a minimal as it exacerbates my symptoms if I don't. I'm an isolationist and become more so when stressed. I'm having difficulty adjusting to the two 25 y.o. since they moved in about 5-6 months ago. It seems their lives are always full of drama and is full of highs and lows (one minute they're laughing, the next they are bickering). My room is right next door so I hear most of it to no end.

I need to get away, and have even gone as far as considering hospitalization to get a break from it all but I'm not sure I currently fit the admittance criteria for such a hospitalization. I have been hospitalized in the past due to being severely ill. I'm just afraid of this simmering for a period of time which would make me more ill. Currently, I feel stuck and always on guard and don't know what to do.

Well, there has to be some kind of crisis intervention plan or some non-emergency inpatient programme, so you can get your head on straight before facing that situation again. But until you can find something like that, I'd suggest a good set of headphones & some music. Whether you're in your room, taking a bath, whatever. You can totally tune them out until you can prepare yourself to face interacting with them. I get the same way, as I'm an isolationist myself. I used to live in a house with 8+ other people for 2 years, full of drama & ********. But I got out of it just fine by ample doses of meditation & distraction. I liked to spend a lot of time on the driveway, drinking a coffee & listening to the quiet cacophany of outdoors.

[BuggsBunny]

Audio books are another option for when you get tired of music. Free at the library. Any way you can drown out the drama will work. I have an MP3 players loaded with about 40 songs that I use when I need to get away from it all. I can even use it doing dishes, as it is so small it tucks in my pocket.(about 30$ at your local walmart). A portable CD player with headphones will be necessary for the audio books, if you are going to fully drown out your housemates. (About 20$ at the same walmart)

You have my sympathies and hugs at your situation.

Do you have plans for a long term solution? Or someone who can help you plan?

[cybermember]

Currently, I've been using two "white noise" sound machines and the "whirl" sound of a fan to drown out some of the noise. It works well in general, but not so good when wanting to listen to the computer or tv.

My T suggested that I leave the house to go to a library for a few hours. It's quiet and no one would bother me. But although it's away from the drama and the 4 barking dogs that are also in the house I find myself struggling to leave the confines of my room to experience an alternative to my situation, even if that time is only brief. I still have a good amount of insight to be aware that something needs to be done or changed so that things don't get progressively worse, just that moving beyond the confines of my room is the biggest challenge.

I could so use some extroverted mania at this point.

[lad007]

This sounds like a miserable way to live. Can you have a house meeting and be honest about what is bothering you? It's your house too. Do they have a lease or is it month to month? I own a house and had a bad roommate and gave her a 30 day notice to leave, it was a tense 30 days, but it was over quick.
I know in a situation like this we have a tendency to isolate and try to avoid the problem but the only way to really solve it is to get it out in the open.
I would have a house meeting and say you are used to quiet and are having trouble adjusting to the noise, and ask them for solutions. Write down what you want to say if you get nervous or don't want to forget something.

[tattedmommy75]

Originally Posted by cybermember

I live in a house with three other people; two are 25 and a couple, myself 48, and the other 55 y.o. I lead a very structured life to keep stress a minimal as it exacerbates my symptoms if I don't. I'm an isolationist and become more so when stressed. I'm having difficulty adjusting to the two 25 y.o. since they moved in about 5-6 months ago. It seems their lives are always full of drama and is full of highs and lows (one minute they're laughing, the next they are bickering). My room is right next door so I hear most of it to no end.

I need to get away, and have even gone as far as considering hospitalization to get a break from it all but I'm not sure I currently fit the admittance criteria for such a hospitalization. I have been hospitalized in the past due to being severely ill. I'm just afraid of this simmering for a period of time which would make me more ill. Currently, I feel stuck and always on guard and don't know what to do.

Nice idea on the headphones but I think you also need to work on getting out. There is always a way out, we just don't always see it. Some suggestions: look around for other roommates whether you stay in that house or find another. They can't be the only people out there who pay enough for you to afford a place. Find a place with more privacy or people you click with better. Maybe you can find your own with a studio if you're strapped for money. Some places have a mother-in-law suite attached to a home and you can rent that for cheap. Ultimately, you will suffer the illness in a poor living environment so you must find a way out. Good luck!

[cybermember]

Moving out is actually not an option. I'm on SSDI so I think where I'm at is pretty good deal except for having two 25 y.o. in the next room. I don't think the new housemates are bad people (I understand no one is implying this), it's just that I can't deal with the ups and downs of drama. On the emotional aspect I think I've been fairly stable but going through someone else's rollercoaster ride is almost as unpleasant as if I were going through my own. On the flip side to all this is that when stressed for long periods of time I become psychotic, so I'm trying to avoid going down that path by thinking of ways to get away even if it means a stay in the hospital. But I'm not sure I can even get in a hospital just as a reprieve because at this point in time I am not a threat to myself or others. Well, at least not yet. Can you be hospitalized for other than being a threat to yourself or others, mentally speaking?

[BuggsBunny]

You can be hospitalized for medication changes, I know that. Otherwise, you might want to check with your pdoc and look at your insurance. Sometimes you can get into a day program, which would get you out of the house, and maybe help you with some coping skills for your current situation.

[cybermember]

A med increase of Geodon was suggested last session but I would rather wait and revisit this option for when it comes out in March as a generic and by far cheaper. I see my pdoc the second week of Feb. so I will discuss the option of a day program with her. In the meantime, I'll be incorporating headphones, white noise and the library to try and keep my stress level low.