[hartbroken]

I was wondering how many people with bipolar here also have delusions, and what areas of life they delude about most?

[AniManiac]

I don't know how I would tell if I was delusional, so I'm guessing that I don't have delusions.

When I'm depressed I get some warped thinking and when I'm hypomanic I get some grandiose thinking, but I'm not sure that any of that would count as "losing touch with reality" or whatever the specific definition is for delusions.

[kykid]

I have suffered with delusions in the past. They were primarily with respect to my job performance and my relationship with my supervisor and led to my diagnosis of bipolar disease.

Since then, I have been on a cocktail of medications (lamictal, abilify, and nortriptyline), and these have enabled me to live a reasonably normal life with no delusions.

[forever]

Before being diagnosed I had a manic episode that included delusions. I had delusions of grandeur believing among other things that I was the Presidents spiritual advisor, eventually I began suffering paranoid delusions. After a ten day stay in the hospital I was diagnosed Bipolar with psychotic features.

I didn't know I was delusional until I had been medicated in the hospital for about five days, suddenly I knew something was very wrong, it was confusing and terrifying to realize I had believed 100% in something that was absolutely not true. It took a long time to separate the delusion with what truly happened.

[moremi]

I have been delusional a few times, sometimes worse than others. One time last summer, I thought I had figured some things out. That our lives were like video games in a way to someone else. It was very strange I remember actually seeing them look out through my eyes or maybe like someone else was watching my life from inside me. Little people. It was the strangest thing, I was terrified that they were just going to want to stop playing or watching and my life would be over. It was like our bodies were avatars and when they shut us off we werent supposed to be able to feel but I did, I had developed feelings outside of their game. Hard to explain. I know nuts right???

[hamster-bamster]

I had delusions of sexual nature in the manic episode that led to a massive suicide attempt.

[hanners]

I don't know if this counts as a delusion or not.

One time (and it only lasted an hour), I believed that the people walking behind me were hired to follow me and find out where I lived. I thought each time someone went a different way, I'd switch to someone else, thinking they were all working in concert. I remember being absolutely convinced this was true, and yet at the same time I had enough insight to realize that this was absurd and probably a delusion.

Thoughts?

[Beebizzy]

Two things stand out, but I experienced both only mildly (but of course at the time it 'was real'): one time when I was hypo I thought I could read people's thoughts - like their minds were a lit up electricity grid or something. And recently when depressed I believed everyone had been told to watch me when I went outside - all eyes were on me.

Delusions are the thing that even when I read about them, and seem to understand, I still have trouble recognizing what truly counts. "Irrational beliefs held with a high degree of conviction." Things like religious dogma or things that are consistent with one's culture don't count.

Apparently they are sub-divided into 2 types: bizarre and non-bizarre. Bizarre is pretty straight-forward - impossible in reality. A read-about example of bizarre: a man believing he is pregnant with German Shepard puppies. (Lol, ok, that's an easy call! l)) It's the non-bizarre types that are harder to see where the line is. It's a belief that might ever-so-possibly be true, but extremely unlikely. Enter paranoia (among other things).

Like AniManiac, my thinking gets pretty warped when depressed and rather grandiose when hypo. I can recognize them as such when I'm balanced, but at the time? Not so much. It seems real. Yet I don't really count them.

But then there's paranoia. Sometimes, it's very "active", I guess you'd say. That happens far less often for me, something like... being convinced I'm under camera surveillance. Not just a passing feeling or a sense of "the creeps". It can go on for a fair while, but I don't think it all the time in day to day life. There are just very occasional spells of it. In day to day life however I do feel more closely scrutinized and monitored than could be realistic. So I am told. That it's ridiculous, that is. But to me it is most certainly NOT ridiculous, I do believe it, and base my actions all the time on it. It's hard to explain, because it's complicated. Depends on the realm. But someone will be on it if I screw up. It'll be bad. Mind you, I'm not talking about me doing anything wrong, but somehow I will pay the price. If you don't want to think they're out there, fine. But I'm not taking any chances. Sooo, are these delusions? One? Both? The second is the regular state of affairs for me. I never stop believing it. Does that level of belief then spill over into my OCD somehow, compelling me to do things because I am sure bad things will happen if I don't? Which came first, the chicken or the egg? For sure it was the chicken. Scrutiny is forever. The rest is just backup. Whatever the verdict, they are in dicier territory.

Ahhh, speaking of dicey territory... delusions of parasitosis, especially in regards to a particular incident involving spiders. Spiders that definitely didn't exist. It wasn't hallucination in that I didn't see them. But I so very much believed that they were upon me and in my hair. I was really flipping out. On and on and could not stop checking, shaking, scratching. I have issues with invisible bugs in general. But... on the more general one, where is the line? OCD fear of contamination? But what of the fact that I'm convinced that what is not there is there?

What was the question again? Yes, I think so, primarily in paranoia, some in parasitosis.

[BlackPup]

I don't struggle with delusions... When my thinking gets warped I sometimes get them but at the time I believe them and then when my meds get fixed and I'm back to 'normal' I think WTF was I thinking!!! really they don't mess me round much so I wouldn't say that I struggle.

[Tsunamisurfer]

Yes, occasionally. Grandiosity most common. Paranoia with bizarre ideas of what happened to me, or what people where plotting - supernatural stuff.

[hartbroken]

Looking past the political correctness, I have had strong delusions that were religiously related.

[Junerain]

I always have the feeling others are talking about me, snickering, or laughing about me..I guess paranoia would be the correct term. Whenever I hear laughing, I am always afraid it's about me

Comes from many years when the laughter really WAS about me..I used to have an odd mindset/behavior, I have learned to tone down my oddities, took many years and failed job attempts..

[AniManiac]

Originally Posted by Innerzone

That happens far less often for me, something like... being convinced I'm under camera surveillance.

Good thing you don't live in the UK. There's CCTV everywhere there.

[Secretum]

I've had weird religious/sexual delusions. I've also been mildly paranoid, and I've believed that I was separate from everyone else in a deeper sense than could ever be true.