[ishy]

I am 27 years old. My parents believe I am making up my symptoms for goodness knows what reason. They do not believe I need treatment.

I had a psychotic episode two years ago. Before my psychotic breakdown I was so irritable around my parents it was unlike me. I was also writing to a colleague continuously and revealing EVERYTHING about my life. I was unable to stop writing and cried in the toilets several times at work because of this. My brain would not shut down. It just went on and on and on. This guy I was writing to didn’t block me from writing to him for 3-4 months even though I asked him to block me off facebook. So it continued that way, every single day. It was almost as if I was stalking this person but to be honest all I was doing is writing. I feel so ashamed and completely take responsibility. This is a guy I hardly knew. I never spoke to him. Only wrote. Then I became psychotic. One of my delusions was that I thought my colleagues (who were doctors as I was working in a hospital at the time) had seen special potential in me because I had special healing powers. They were going to invest in me to become a doctor. When I told my parents I was going to become a doctor and was going to earn big money and was soon to move out they believed me. Of course none of that happened. And even though it happened right in front of their eyes, they deny anything is wrong. They actually believed my delusions. They don’t know about me writing to my colleague btw.

Anyway, I accepted treatment. And have been on meds ever since and have been diagnosed with schizophrenia.

But then two years later they put me on an antidepressant. My psychiatrist believes it has made me slightly hypomanic. When relatives came over I used to hide upstairs, never came down, answered the door or the phone. Now I do all these things. I am not as withdrawn. My parents see this as an improvement from my past behavior. And they question why a psychiatrist would put me down by attributing this improvement to mania. I’ve became more talkative, more productive at work, more sociable, ... thats a good thing right? But I spent close to £3000 on junk like I bought a domain name for £900 or a pendant for £820 and a bunch of other stuff.

[bipolarmedstudent]

It is good in some ways, but the overspending on junk is a CLASSIC sign of mania. I know, I have it too.

Sometimes parents can be in denial when their kids are sick. They don't want to face it. Don't let them convince you that you aren't ill. Listen to your doctor. He's not 'putting you down'. He's concerned about you. Your mania could get even worse. Today you are spending money on junk. Tomorrow, you could be hurting yourself. You need to listen to him and treat your mania.

[BuggsBunny]

I have to agree with the above post. Parents are soooo good at denial. So are family members, often times. Stick with your pdoc and let him know you are doing better socially, but showing signs of mania (Let him know what you bought and for how much. He'll get the picture.) Also, if you haven't, let him know about the writing, if you are still doing it.

You sound like a good candidate for a journal. If you feel funny about writing to no one, Don't title it like a letter. I used to call mine Hmn Notes. They were just things I wanted to get out of my system or tell someone. Writing can be therapeutic, if used properly. Just be sure to keep it hidden when you aren't writing.

[ishy]

Thanks I always tell my pdoc everything even though my parents tell me to keep it all to myself. They just feel she will keep increasing my meds if I tell her anything.

Originally Posted by BuggsBunny

Also, if you haven't, let him know about the writing, if you are still doing it..

I have told her. But she said it was part of the psychotic process rather than mania. That's why she diagnosed me with schizophrenia the first time round.

[Secretum]

((ishy)) I don't think that you have been faking your symptoms. Unfortunately, as bipolarmedstudent already mentioned, it's hard for parents to accept when their kids are ill. Please continue to take care of yourself. I hope you and your pdoc can get the mania under control soon!