[hamster-bamster]

I am considering, for the first time in my life at 41, roommating with someone. I am interested to learn about bad experiences people have had sharing space - all sorts of bad experiences. I want to know what the extra couple hundred bucks cost in reality. Thanks!!

[BuggsBunny]

Don't get your roommate off the psych unit. And don't room with anyone else with MI/MH issues. It's hard enough with your own head, you don't need someone else's emotions running amok. Get references and actually call them. If you have computer access run a legal check. At the very least, Google them. Make a rent contract (who pays what to whom, and when, and how much.) sit down ahead of time and determine who will pay what bill, or how bills will be covered. How is the food going to be handled? community fridge, or you get one side, I get the other, and you don't eat your roomie's food without permission.Write it all out so when there are conflicts you have a written document to back up up in an argument. If it's an apartments, who's name will it be in? don't let it be all yours, or you will be responsible for all the rent if your roomie moves out early. Watch out for things like phone bills, that can be run up sky high by one person who may not have the money to cover it. (my advice, get a cell phone instead of a land line.)

[LiteraryLark]

My ex best friend, who is bipolar schizoaffective, made life miserable for her roomates. Everyday was meltdown after meltdown after meltdown, dumping all of her problems on to her roommates who were also her landlords and expecting them to act as their caregivers. She got kicked out and was begging to come back, last I heard of her. Moral of the story is don't be a burden on someone else!

Roommates can be great. Of course, bad roommates can consist of: drug use, excessive partying conflicting personalities, sloppiness, and can flake on paying bills. But I would be more concerned about your own personal well being.

Ask yourself:

Am I ready to move out with another person?
What are my expectations with a roomate?
Why do I need a roomate?
Can I handle another person knowing my disabilities?
Would I expect them to take care of me or inform me when I am acting strange?
Would I take advantage of my roommate in any way?
Can I function normally with my meds and be able to work and pay bills?

Those are just the questions off the top of my head, but really, you have to ask yourself firstly if a roommate is necessary, if you could get along with a roommate, and if you are stable enough to not become a burden to your roommate.

[touchingsaturn]

i was the bipolar roommate many years back.. i was not well medicated at the time & looking back i was a nightmare to live with... i'm very fortunate that my ex-roommate is still my friend... though we did go for a few years without contact after she moved out... and i don't blame her one bit..

if you're planning on moving in with someone, definitely ask yourself all those questions suggested by drskipper... that's a great starting point... also consider how well managed your illness is right now & whether or not it's a good idea to add so many variables into the mix by moving in with someone... also, be prepared to tell whoever you're considering moving in with that you have these issues and how they affect you & could possibly affect them at some point... don't sugar coat it.. better to let them know ahead of time, than move in and face a living disaster because they had no idea what they were getting into..

whatever you do, i would advise against moving in with a friend... it's the one of the best ways to ruin a good friendship... never understood why people always said that until after i had a few roommates and almost lost a best friend...

i have determined, i can't do the roommate thing again.. might save me money, but it's not worth the cost to my sanity level...

best luck to you!