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KarmaRules
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Trig Apr 19, 2012 at 03:03 AM
  #1
I am not sure really what to do anymore. My family is driving me insane!
Just some background info...due to my husband needing to miss almost 3 weeks of work in Feb due to emergency surgery which left our finances in tatters, then our daughter having to be hospitalized 8 days for being suicidal (she's bipolar) and then a month later for another 9 days for swallowing a handful of pills...then our son had a psychotic episode from not taking his meds while at a friend's for a week so HE was hospitalized for a week...

Anyway, I have been battling a severe mixed episode for the last few months. psychosis at times, other times just wanting to blissfully fall asleep and maybe just stay asleep for a good long while. I am tired yet so full of nervous, agitated energy all the time. Plus, I have recently been worked up for the fibro, carpal tunnel, and chronic nerve pain in my back.

The problem is, my healthy (mentally & physically) husband has left every aspect of trying to maintain our household to me. The fact that he missed so much work still has me digging us out of a hole, the kids are all over the place, he has completely shut down and I am just so f'ing mad and sad and overwhelmed...

I saw my pdoc today, and he asked me if i had any thoughts of hurting myself... without even thinking about it, i replied, "of course, but I'm too damn busy to kill myself right now."
That scared me because it was almost a relief to have said it. My husband just won't hear me...

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Karma...

“Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.” Dr. Seuss


Diagnosed Bipolar I with bouts of psychosis, PTSD, ADD, anxiety...also diabetic, battle chronic migraines & fibromyalgia.
psych meds include Lamictal, Zyprexa, Lyrica & Ativan
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Default Apr 19, 2012 at 03:35 AM
  #2
That is one incredible struggle, Karma.
Well done for being so determined to win.
I really hope your burdens lift soon.
TS

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