I am going to a birthday party for a friend on Saturday. Ya ok I have some friends sort of no not really. These are more my boyfriends friends. I went to reply that I would be attending on the Facebook invite and saw that my nurse from the psych ward was also attending. I know they are friends so not shocked.

This is soo embarrassing tho. I was hospitalized for acute mania and psychosis. I was the only psychotic or manic patient on the ward at the time. I fainted three times in the halls that's a bit memorable. This psych nurse told me I looked like Lady Gaga to which I took offence and let him know, if I wasn't manic I would likely have brushed it off. He later apologized. Haha and for the record the only similarity is that we both have blonde hair . I also have very identifying tattoos. I have a tattoo of around my neck of being decapitated and stitched back together. I have one near my eye, and large ones on my arms that look like henna so they are pretty recognizable.

I know he will recognize me, I am already socially awkward and have a hard time in social situations. So I'm getting all worked up over this. How embarrassing. He is good friends with these people, so I'm worried that he will tell them afterwards how he knows me. And how awkward the evening will be. Not to mention these are my boyfriends friends not mine really, I've known them for 5 years but not that well.

I don't drink because it makes me extremely depressed afterwards, I don't know if this is a time where I should have a few to be able to get through this evening or what.

I don't really have a problem with people knowing I have bipolar. Being in the psych ward and psychotic tho, while seeing me at some of my worst, that's what I feel embarrassed about people knowing. These people are not exactly the least judgmental people around, there are reasons why we haven't become close friends.

Okay I keep overthinking this. The girl who's birthday it is recently joined up at my yoga studio that I attend. She does like to gossip, that I know, I love my studio because it's my tranquil place that I get to go and escape from everything else. She knows a lot of people there as well. I live in a small place, everyone seems to know everyone. I don't want this to be new gossip or gossip at the yoga studio Contrary to belief yogis gossip.

Unfortunately I know she is the type of person that will tell everyone if she finds out.

[Seaswept]

Hi Anika

If this nurse is a true professional, he will not say a word. These people risk losing their job if they talk about patients.

I have run into staff from the psych ward but not at a party, just in passing.
It felt akward and we both just said hi- no more.

I think it will be okay. I don't think he will say anything; he has probably been in this situation before. Confidentiality is huge in this field.

Do you happen to have any Xanax or could you get some? I can only speak for myself but Xanax has helped a lot with social anxiety.

Good luck

I hope he's professional, but he is also good friend with my good friends brother. Yup small place, I don't know that he actually sounds very professional at all. I hope he is.

I don't have any Xanax or any benzos at all. I have a heck of a time getting any either. I was thinking just do lots of yoga, mindfulness and try to just put it to the back of my mind. But I know once I get there it will be difficult. It's a party in their house, drinking, hot tub ect. More of an intimate type setting.

[Seaswept]

Even though you already rsvp'd you still have the option of not going. The way you describe it, I wouldn't go. You're just going to drive yourself crazy. You are worrying about it now and you'll still be worried after. Its not worth it. Say you are sick.

[Trippin2.0]

How do you feel about inboxing him on fb? 2 birds with 1 stone the way I see it. You could end up agreeing to pretend you just met bcoz none of your friends know your dx, and he will undoubtedly know, that should gossip start, HE was the 1 to break confidentiality, AND you'll have it in writing, should you have to report him. So that's 3 birds!

I thought about not going but I hardly get invited anywhere ever. I actually got a personal invite this time, not just to my bf and assuming he can invite me. That felt kind of nice. So I will face up. My boyfriend told me today that three other people we know are nurses at the hospital now. Oh brother, maybe my next visit I'll go to the next city.

Hmm didn't think about msging him. I'll think about that. I'm really trying to challenge myself with this. I mean I could go and maybe he wouldn't say a thing. I could end up having a fun time even. I've really been trying to be more social. I've chatted this girl up a lot at yoga, I think that's why I actually got my own invite this time, so I don't want to back out. My bf and I could use some socializing forsure.

I talked to him about and he said he doesn't care what his friends would think, that he loves me and knows me and that's that. He hasn't hung out with these people either in a long time. Could be I'm worrying about nothing.

Maybe this is a good time to practice my self esteem and confidence. Yup I'm going to approach it like that. I might have some quirks but I'm a good person, I'm nice and I try my best. Silly because I know people at the yoga studio and they even seem to like me. Why am I worried about that ?

[unaluna]

Originally Posted by Anika

I fainted three times in the halls that's a bit memorable. This psych nurse told me I looked like Lady Gaga to which I took offence and let him know... He later apologized. Haha and for the record the only similarity is that we both have blonde hair . I also have very identifying tattoos. I have a tattoo around my neck of being decapitated and stitched back together.

Umm... I get a LITTLE temporary tattoo at the local summer art fair and people (strangers AND non) treat me differently. I kinda think... I know what I'm getting THIS summer! Go to the party and have a good time!

I do notice that in some situations you do get treated a little differently. I got most of mine when I was young, starting at 16, if I could go back in time I might change some of them. The henna ones I would not change, I think they are beautiful and feminine. The neck one is kind of funny, when I was a hair stylist I had a few senior women tell me they really liked my necklace . I think they might have had poor eye sight.

It's exciting getting them tho, Hankster what are you getting? I hope it turns out great for you.

Sounds like you have a great plan, Anika!

[BuggsBunny]

Anika, my T of many years became my friend and used to invite me to her family parties. Birthdays, holidays, and once even a wine tasting (LOL< I don't drink!) We came up with a mutually agreeable explanation on how we knew each other (at one point we happened to attend the same church) and we stuck with that. To this day the only people that know the truth are her husband and oldest son, who also invite me to important events.

At first, I looked on it at social skills practice. (I'm not the most socially mature person, and I just didn't know how to handle groups of people.) Later as I began to know her extended family, they became enjoyable occasions.

Having our agreed on explanation made the situation safe while I practiced my skills and learned to just be me, but not talk about the psych aspect of my life.

Talk to this nurse ahead of time and agree on a limit or "how you know each other " for what you both will say. With this safety net in place, you can go and enjoy yourself.